The Paradigm Alteration
by FireTigerSoul
Summary: After a slight head injury, Penny comes to realize how much the boys care for her well-being. She also realizes a certain someone might care more than they let on...
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I've crawled out of my cave and started writing again! Amazing, I know. Sometimes I'm just too lazy for words. In any case...this little story would not leave me alone until I started writing it. It hasn't been checked over by a beta, and I haven't written anything in quite some time, so...go easy on me.

**The Paradigm Alteration**

If her head hurt any worse, Penny thought she just might fall over and die. Clutching her forehead with one hand and her keys in the other, she slowly made her way to the entrance to her apartment building. Her apron hung loose on her hips, but she couldn't find the strength to reach down and tighten it. She had gone in for her shift and stayed for just two hours before a searing pain in her head made her drop a tray of dishes in the kitchen. Luckily, Bernadette and several others immediately ran over to help her pick everything up before the manager could come in and see the mess.

"Are you okay?" Bernadette had asked Penny once everything was picked up.

"I'm fine," she had answered and managed to give a convincing smile before slowly getting back to her tables, ignoring the massive headache that was still pounding in her head.

Twenty minutes later, she knew that she wasn't going to last the entire shift. Her manager was disappointed, but reluctantly allowed her to leave early. After her remaining customers had left, Penny immediately went home, driving five miles under the speed limit and clutching her head the whole way home.

"Asprin. Bed." She whispered over and over as she walked up to open the entrance. Staring at the ground as she passed through it, she turned and was about to reach the first step when a familiar voice reached her ears.

"Oh, hello Penny." A mailbox shut with a loud clang.

Sheldon.

"Hey Sheldon," she replied, her voice barely above a whisper as she began climbing the stairs. As much as she hated to be rude and walk away, her head was throbbing to the point where she felt as if she could burst into tears at any moment.

"Why aren't you at work? It's Tuesday night. We eat there on Tuesday nights. Why are you not there on a Tuesday night?" His voice began to climb higher and higher, alarmed at the sudden change to his regular schedule.

"Sheldon, I'm sick," She whispered, still climbing. She could hear him climbing the stairs right behind her.

"What kind of sick?" He immediately backed away, and she could see him in her mind pulling a sleeve over his nose and mouth.

"I have a massive headache," She explained slowly. "And can you please lower your voice? It really hurts," She closed her eyes and let the wall guide her, hoping that a lack of light would lessen the pain.

"Nothing contagious?" He whispered loudly, still following her but from much further behind.

"No, Sheldon, I'm not contagious. I just have a headache," She sighed and stepped onto the second floor landing.

"Oh," He was suddenly back at her side. "Well if it's just a headache, then why aren't you at work? It's Tuesday."

"Yes, Sheldon, I realize that it's Tuesday," She snapped and immediately regretted it. Her head throbbed and she had to stop on the stairs to recover from the pain. "Ohh, this is the worst headache ever."

They reached the third floor. Sheldon had thankfully stopped talking, but continued to match her pace as they slowly ascended to the fourth floor.

"Sheldon?" She sighed as she reached the final step on the fourth floor and held out her hand in his direction. "Bernadette is working tonight. She knows to keep an eye on your food to make sure nobody touches it. Ask to be seated in her section. I'm going to bed."

"But,-" he sputtered behind her, most likely trying to wrap his brain around the idea that Penny would not be serving his cheeseburger that night.

She quickly opened the door to her apartment, trying to get inside before Sheldon could stop her again. Unfortunately, she was attempting to move at a faster pace than her limbs were able to function in her present condition. As she stepped inside and attempted to turn around and shut the door, she tripped over her own foot and fell forward.

Penny barely saw the corner of her coffee table as her head came crashing down upon it. Her vision immediately blacked out.


	2. Chapter 2

**The Paradigm Alteration**

Chapter Two

"Penny? Penny? Penny?"

Penny heard her name, but couldn't find the strength to open her eyes. A faint beeping was coming from somewhere behind her, and she felt something bumping the end of her nose.

"Ngnmmm," was all she was able to get out. Her mouth wasn't moving the way it should, but she couldn't summon the energy to care.

"She's awake," She heard another voice. _Leonard_, she faintly thought to herself. "Go get a nurse."

"On it," a third voice. _Howard_. Footsteps rushed away, and a sliding metallic sound reached her ears.

"Penny, can you open your eyes?" Leonard's voice was coming from right above her face.

She could hear the concern in each of their voices, but she couldn't seem to figure out where she was or why she was there. She made an effort to open her eyelids, but they were heavy and it took several attempts to open them at least half-way.

Three blurred figures stood over her, and it was clear she was lying down. She blinked several times to try and clear her vision, but the blurriness would not go away. It was at that point that her mind began to panic slightly. Self-preservation reared its head and her heart started pounding.

"Ngnnm," She tried to speak, but only a moan came out.

"It's okay, it's okay," Leonard quickly assured her, reaching out and touching her shoulder. "The nurse is on her way. Don't worry."

"Her heart rate and breathing has increased exponentially," she could hear Sheldon's voice coming from her right. _Sheldon_. "She must be experiencing some sort of panic." A pause. "Something must be wrong."

The monotonous voice was more soothing than Leonard's concern and physical touch. Sheldon was a genius, analytical. Emotions wouldn't cloud his judgment of the situation. Surely he would be able to figure out what was wrong.

"Is she awake?" A rough, female voice filtered through as another blurry figure appeared on her left. The figure pushed aside Leonard and moved closer, taking out something from her pocket and shining it in her eyes. The light hurt, but Penny couldn't summon the energy to protest.

"Pupils look better," the nurse said as she put her instrument away. "Penelope, are you able to open your eyes all the way?"

Penny blinked, closed her eyes for a few moments, then pushed her body to open them again.

"Good, very good," the nurse praised.

Penny felt a small rush of relief as the previously blurry figures were now a little clearer. She could make out the shape of the bodies that were surrounding her – the nurse, Leonard, and Howard on her left side, Sheldon and Raj on her right.

The nurse reached out and grabbed her hand. "Okay, now I need you to squeeze my hand."

She did...weakly.

"Much better," the nurse praised. "Now, are you able to talk? Try saying your name, sweetie."

Penny struggled to move her tongue, but it was thick and heavy inside her mouth. She formed the first syllable with her lips, but nothing came out after "Pe-". Panic came back full force and she focused all she had into moving her tongue.

"Penny." It came out slow and slurred, but she did it.

"Doing well, Penny," the nurse nodded. "Much better from last time."

_Last time?_

"Is it a concussion?" Sheldon asked from above her.

"Is anyone here actually family?" The nurse interrupted him, looking around at each of the boys.

"Um, I'm sort of family," Leonard spoke up in his hesitant way, slowly raising a hand in the air. "If you count ex-boyfriends." He finished lamely, putting his hand down and nervously rubbing it with his other hand.

"I don't think anyone counts ex-boyfriends," the nurse retorted. "I'm sorry, but you're not family."

"But,-"

"I don't even know who let you in here," the nurse shook her head. "You are not supposed to be here."

Suddenly a curtain opened and Penny could make out a figure with red hair enter.

"It's okay," another female voice joined them. "These are all my friends. Penny doesn't have family in the state and these boys are very close to her. I allowed them to visit for a few minutes."

_Doctor. Stephanie. I'm in a hospital?_

Suddenly it came back to her. The door, the headache, the coffee table.

"Ohhh," she moaned and closed her eyes. It was if everything was coming back to her at once. The medical bills were going to be through the roof. Her crappy insurance wasn't going to pay for anything.

"Are you awake now?" Stephanie replaced the nurse at her side.

Penny opened her eyes and sighed in relief when Stephanie's face was crytal clear. "M'kay," she managed to slur her response.

"Clearly you sound okay," Stephanie chuckled and went about checking Penny's vitals.

"Was it a concussion?" Sheldon asked once more.

"Penny? Can they stay here while I discuss your medical information?" Stephanie asked Penny as she was jotting down notes in a file.

"Kay," Penny responded. Single syllable responses were easier to get out. Her body was doing much better from a few moments ago, but she was still lethargic.

"What's with all the hospital mumbo-jumbo? Can't you just tell us what's going on?" Howard spoke up from the end of the bed, clearly irritated.

"Legal mumbo-jumbo," Stephanie corrected. "Yes, I believe it was a concussion." She finally answered Sheldon.

"Then why is she still having difficulty speaking? Are you sure it isn't a contusion?" Sheldon persisted.

"Sheldon," Stephanie replied slowly, as if speaking to a child. "The MRI scan showed no damage to the brain. It's a concussion. A major concussion, but a concussion nevertheless."

_MRI scan?_ Penny started to panic. When did she have an MRI?

"MRI?" Penny spoke, still slurring.

"You don't remember?" Leonard frowned, concerned.

"Does she have amnesia?" Howard asked, slightly hopeful. "Hello there," he slid easily into the spot where Sheldon was previously, having pushed him out of the way. "I'm Howard. Your boyfriend."

"Howard!" Stephanie and Leonard shouted. Raj shook his fist in the air, his face filled with disgust.

Penny was about to try and say something to the little creep when Sheldon beat her to it.

"Kindly remove yourself from my spot," He insisted, reaching for Howard's shoulder and pushing him away.

_Sheldon's using physical force?_

"Your spot? This isn't your spot, Sheldon, it's a hospital bed. _Penny's_ hospital bed," Howard retorted, clearly annoyed at the intervention.

"Yes, and this is my spot," Sheldon reiterated, stepping back up to Penny's side. "It's under the air conditioner vent. Furthermore, I called dibs."

"Oh good lord," Leonard groaned, his head falling into his hand.

"Okay guys, I think Penny should stay here for another couple of hours, just in case," Stephanie cut in, putting away Penny's file. "She's doing much better from the last time I came in here, but I just want to be sure before I release her."

The boys nodded.

"So, out you get! Back to the waiting room. I can only pull so many strings, you know," Stephanie shooed them away from the bed. They followed reluctantly.

"Feel better, Penny. We'll be waiting here to take you home later," Leonard turned and smiled reassuringly as he was pushed away by Stephanie. Howard nodded, and Raj waved goodbye. Sheldon said nothing, following behind everyone else.

As Penny's eyes drifted downwards, exhausted from the mere ten minutes she was awake, she could have swore she saw Sheldon turn and glance at her as he walked away. Chalking it up to the concussion, Penny drifted back into a dreamless sleep.

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_A/N : Reviews are love. :3_


	3. Chapter 3

**The Paradigm Alteration**

Chapter Three

When Penny finally woke up hours later, she felt much like her usual self. Her vision was clear, her head felt fine, and she was able to swallow and move her tongue around much easier than before. She took a careful look around her.

It was clear she was in the emergency room, as she could hear people rushing around and talking from behind the curtain that surrounded her bed. Underneath her sheets, she could feel that she was wearing a hospital gown. Made sense if she did, in fact, have an MRI. How come she couldn't remember getting here? Or having an MRI?

She seemed to vaguely remember reading somewhere that concussions could lead to amnesia, but she always thought it was for a couple of minutes, not a couple of hours.

Shaking her head to try and clear it, she felt an oxygen tube bump the end of her nose. Annoyed, she reached up slowly with her arm and tugged the tube off her face and from behind her ears. This little hospital trip was going to cost her a small fortune in medical bills.

Sighing, she slowly sat up in bed and took the time to make sure everything was in working order.

_Able to move? Check._

Feeling like she had just woken up from a 12 hour nap, Penny swung her legs weakly over the side of the bed, waiting for her body to realize it was time to get moving. Just as she was about to hop down, the curtain was pushed back and Stephanie walked in.

"Oh, you're up," Stephanie seemed surprised. "Well, that's a good thing. How are you feeling?"

"M'okay," she answered, then frowned. "Still slurring?" She asked, more to herself than to Stephanie.

"No, not too bad," Stephanie assured her. "Remember, you just woke up."

"True," Penny nodded, then watched as Stephanie began writing things in her file again. "Can I leave?"

"Not yet," Stephanie turned over the file and handed her a pen. "I need you to sign here."

Penny didn't even bother to read it. "What is it?"

"Just papers saying that I've released you and that I'd like you to follow the directions that I have here on this paper," she held up a small packet of papers. "Your after-care information." She explained.

"Oh," Penny nodded and signed the paper, handing it back to Stephanie.

"Okay then," Stephanie perked up and pulled out a bag of clothes from underneath the bed. "Here are your clothes. You can get changed and I'll walk you out to the waiting room. Do you need help?"

Penny shook her head vehemently. "No, no, I'm fine." She reached for the bag and began taking her clothes out.

Stephanie waited outside the curtain while Penny dressed as quickly as she was able to. She wanted to get out of the hospital before any more charges went on her bill. It was bad enough she was going to be late on her rent this month, but now with this hanging over her head?

"Ow," Penny sighed and held her head. Her head no longer hurt, but it felt like it should. The money problems were becoming a huge issue in her life, and she just couldn't take it anymore. She'd been working overtime at the restaurant lately, thankfully able to despite how slow it had been at the Cheesecake Factory. Even working overtime had not been enough to cover her expenses for that month. She needed a new job...working as a waitress just wasn't cutting it anymore. On top of all of that, her acting dreams were slowly becoming further and further away with each passing day and no word on any audition opportunities.

"Penny?"

"Oh, right," Penny slowly stood, fully dressed. "Sorry." She moved the curtain aside and walked past it. She looked back to her bed, but she had everything from the bag. "I feel weird walking out of here without my purse."

"I believe the boys have it in the waiting room," Stephanie placed a hand on Penny's upper back and slowly directed her towards the waiting room.

"They do?" Penny asked, incredulous.

"Yes, it was on your shoulder when they brought you in."

"Oh," Penny frowned, confused. "I still don't remember what happened between hitting my head and waking up a couple of hours ago."

"That's okay, I'm sure the boys will fill you in," Stephanie smiled and opened the waiting room door.

"Listen, Stephanie, thank you so much for taking care of me," Penny turned and reached out for Stephanie's hand. "I couldn't think of a better doctor to have."

"Oh, don't thank me," Stephanie gave a small laugh. "The boys actually dragged me over to the emergency room from the surgery department."

"They did?" Penny's eyebrows went up a notch.

"Yeah...Leonard tried buttering me up, Howard played the wounded puppy bit, Raj, well...Raj just stood there, and Sheldon gave me a long speech about some study conducted that had some positive correlation between familiar doctors and faster healing times," Stephanie shrugged.

A short laugh burst from Penny's chest and she found herself smiling for the first time in weeks. "Yeah, I can see all of that happening."

"Hey Penny," Leonard's voice came from behind her.

She turned around and found a wall of nerds lined up behind her. She smiled again. "Hey guys." She turned around and hugged Stephanie. "Well, thanks again for taking care of me."

"No problem," Stephanie gave a small smile, clearly uncomfortable with the hug. "I have to run. I'm sure I'll see you guys again." Penny could see now that she was avoiding Leonard's eyes.

"You can see a lot more of me whenever you'd like," Howard leaned forward and raised an eyebrow suggestively.

"Howard," Stephanie's voice fell to a flat tone. "You're still creepy." And with that, she walked back into the emergency room.

"I see you're able to talk again," Sheldon broke the silence with his comment, his hands resting behind his back.

"I am!" She smiled and leaned over to hug Leonard. "Thank you so much, you guys." She hooked an arm behind Howard's neck and gave him a brief half-hug before he could grab at her. "I really appreciate you helping me out." She hugged Raj, ignoring the slight squeak that came out of his mouth. "It's nice to know I have people that care about me." She hesitated before hugging Sheldon, knowing full well he probably wouldn't appreciate physical contact.

_Well he could just suck it up._

She leaned forward and put her arms around him, resting her cheek lightly on his chest. As expected, he went completely stiff. After a second or two, she let go and stepped away, prepared for some sort of lecture or scolding.

Instead, she was pleasantly surprised by a short nod of the head, though his eyes were downcast and she could see the muscle above his jaw was twitching like mad. No doubt he was pondering the implications of coming in contact with someone who had been in a hospital bed surrounded by sick people for hours.

"We're just glad you're okay," Leonard's voice came up behind her and his hand rested on her shoulder. "Are you ready to go home?" He asked.

"Yes please," she replied, shrugging his hand off lightly. She couldn't explain it, but something just didn't feel right with his hand there.

"Well, I don't know about you guys, but I have seriously worked up an appetite from Trestling for four hours," Howard puffed out his chest slightly and put his hands on his hips, rocking back on his heels. "I could go for some Chinese."

"It's Tuesday," Sheldon interjected as they began walking out the door. "We eat at the Cheesecake Factory."

Raj leaned over and whispered into Leonard's ear.

"Yeah, Raj has a point. Penny should be resting in a quiet environment," Leonard pointed out. "I'm sure the Cheesecake Factory isn't exactly an ideal option here."

"Well," Penny spoke up. "We could get Cheesecake Factory to go." She offered.

"Really? You'd be okay with that?" Leonard asked.

"An excellent compromise," Sheldon spoke up as they reached Leonard's car. "Penny, I believe that head injury has finally done you some good. To the Cheesecake Factory, Leonard. I'll call along the way and place our order."

A collective groan went through the group.

Penny just smiled.

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_A/N: Yep, it's moving slowly, but it's moving! :) I promise the next couple of chapters will pick up._


	4. Chapter 4

**The Paradigm Alteration**

Chapter Four

"Call it whatever you want," Howard pointed a fry at Raj and Leonard. "But chicks watch that show."

"What does that have to do with _you_ watching it every week?" Leonard asked, taking another bite of his barbeque burger.

"Women are really into this show. Therefore, if I watch it, I'll have a really great conversation starter next time I cruise the bars for hot chicks!" Howard explained.

"Okay, but that doesn't explain the reason for the 'True Blood' t-shirt you're wearing," Leonard countered.

"Well, hello," Howard threw his arms out, showcasing the t-shirt. "Chick magnet, right here."

Leonard and Raj rolled their eyes and shook their heads at the same time.

Sheldon, seated in his spot, turned to the girl seated next to him on the couch. "I take it back. I'd rather listen to a conversation about shoes."

Penny snorted and leaned back further into the couch, staring off into the distance.

"Are you okay?" Leonard asked, noticing that she hadn't touched her food.

"I'm fine," she finally responded. "I'm just really tired for some reason."

"That's expected," Sheldon spoke up, picking up a fry from his take-out container and examining it before dipping it lightly into the small cup of ketchup and bringing it to his mouth. "You'll most likely be tired for the next few days."

"Yeah, well, I'll just have to get over it," Penny sighed. "I have the dinner shift tomorrow."

A heavy pause settled over the group and Penny sensed tension immediately.

"What?" She asked, confused.

"No, you don't," Sheldon answered, picking up his burger and taking a bite.

"No, I don't what?" Penny turned her head and looked up at the man sitting next to her.

"No, you don't have the dinner shift," he explained, not even bothering to turn his head and look at her.

"What do you mean?" Penny was confused. "Today is Tuesday, right? I offered to pick up the dinner shift tomorrow. I remember that talk with my manager. I'm sure I have the dinner shift," she insisted, frowning to herself.

"Yes, but we canceled it," Sheldon's offhanded remark immediately caused a reaction in Penny.

"You did what?" She asked in a low tone, dangerously.

"Well, Penny," Leonard tried to explain, but Penny held up a hand to stop him.

"No, no, I want Dr. Whack-a-doodle to explain to me why he felt the need to give away my shift without even asking,-" she paused, ten indignant replies forming in her head at once. "No, no, he doesn't have the right to,-"

"I," Sheldon stressed, "had no right to inform your manager that you would be out sick for the next three days. You are absolutely right. However, Stephanie and several other doctors concurred that the busy and complicated environment of a restaurant, not to mention the perceived vast mental activities that are involved with taking simple dinner orders, would be too much for you after your head injury, and therefore strongly advised that you stay home for the next few days."

He took another bite of his burger. Penny stared at him for a few moments.

"What?"

"Oh, my apologies," he placed his take-out container on the coffee table and turned slightly so he was somewhat facing Penny. "I've forgotten that your head injury makes it difficult to follow complicated trains of thoughts this soon after the injury." He paused and looked up to the bandage that was covering a cut on her forehead. "I will attempt to slow down my speech to the rate a child might understand."

"...what?" Penny looked at him as if he were insane. "Sheldon, I understand what you're saying. I just don't see how it possibly concerns you! How could you just cancel my shifts for the next three days?"

_Oh, hello headache. There you are. You weren't away for long, were you?_

"Ohh," she groaned and put her hand over her forehead.

"Is your injury causing you distress?"

"Penny, are you okay?"

"Want some drugs?"

Sheldon, Leonard, and Howard all spoke at once.

"Yes, my injury is causing me distress, no, I'm not okay, and _yes, please_ Howard," Penny groaned again. "Man, I never thought those words would pass out of my lips."

"Like sweet manna to my ears," Howard sang dreamily before gliding out of his chair and walking towards the bathroom.

"Asprin is in the medicine cabinet," Leonard shouted after him.

"Tylenol," Sheldon countered. "Penny is only allowed to take asprin-free medications at this point."

"Oh, really?" Leonard scooped up the after-care sheet that was perched on Sheldon's arm rest. "What else does it say she should do?"

"Rest, light activities, and she needs to be woken up every two hours," Sheldon responded, taking the bottle of Tylenol from Howard's outstretched hand and opening it, allowing two pills to fall into his hand.

"Um, I was handing that to Penny," Howard blinked. Raj immediately stood up and whispered into Howard's ear.

"Yeah, Raj is right. Who's going to wake her up every two hours?" He seemed to perk up at this thought, but before he could say anything further, Penny spoke up.

"Not you," She glared up at him from under her hands. "Don't even suggest it."

"Penny," he protested lightly. "I'm hurt that you would even think that I would take advantage of you in this situation. I'm purely interested in making sure you're okay."

"Yeah, sure you are," Penny responded tightly before jerking her head back and away from the outstretched hand that was suddenly in front of her face.

"Here," Sheldon was holding out two Tylenol in one hand, and Penny's bottled water in the other.

"Oh, um," Penny frowned, confused. Was Sheldon actually helping her? "Thank you?" It came out more of a question than a statement, but she took the two pills and swallowed them quickly. "My head still hurts," she finally admitted, closing her eyes and leaning back. She allowed the water bottle to be taken from her hand and placed back on the coffee table.

"Do we really have to wake her up every two hours?" Leonard asked, looking over the paper again. "Can't we just...set her alarm?"

_Gee, thanks Leonard._

"What if she sleeps right through it?" Sheldon picked up his container again and began searching for an acceptable fry. "The whole point of waking someone who has just received a concussion is to ensure their mental abilities are fully-functioning and not in need of further medical assistance."

"I'm sure I'll be fine," Penny spoke up, her eyes still closed. She felt like she was floating, but the conversation was keeping her awake. Her head pain was lessening, which was a relief. Although she was upset over the fact that she was going to lose three days worth of pay, she couldn't find the strength to care at this point. If it came down to it, she would just max out another credit card. She still couldn't believe that they canceled her shifts without saying anything to her. No wonder they wanted her to wait in the car with Raj while they picked up their meal.

"Well, what if we checked every four hours?" Leonard offered, clearly put off by the idea of having to get up every two hours during the night. "That could work, right?"

"Well, I suppose." Howard sat back down in his chair. "I mean, if her brain is toast at 2:00 AM, it'll still be toast at 6:00 AM." He offered lightly.

"Thanks Howard," Penny replied. "I could have done without that image, thank you."

"Nonsense," Sheldon spoke up once more. "The paper says every two hours and she will be woken up every two hours. Penny will simply sleep here on the couch and we'll wake her every two hours."

"She'll what?" Howard and Leonard's eyes widened slightly. Raj dropped the pizza crust he was munching on.

"Well I'm certainly not going to wade through the disaster area she calls a 'home' across the hall," Sheldon remarked sharply, finding another acceptable fry and dipping it lightly in ketchup.

"Well, yeah, I mean...it was kind of implied that Penny was going to stay here," Leonard began.

"But _you _suggested it," Howard finished for him, still staring at Sheldon as if he had grown horns.

"Yes, I did," Sheldon replied before putting the fry back down and straightening slightly. "Should I have not? Have I crossed some social boundary that I am not aware of?"

"Well, I think you crossed over into the human boundary," Penny offered, opening her eyes and looking up at him. "That was very nice of you to offer, Sheldon. Thank you."

_Wow. Maybe there's hope for him yet._

"You're welcome," he cocked his head in acknowledgment before picking up his fry once more.

"What the frack just happened here?" Howard asked, still staring at Sheldon.

"I don't know," Leonard replied, shaking his head. "He's actually being...nice." He spat out the word as if it were a curse.

Raj got up once more to whisper into Howard's ear.

"No, we're definitely sure it was Penny with the head injury," Howard assured his friend.

Penny sighed and closed her eyes. She wasn't sure why Sheldon was being so involved in her recovery, but she didn't really want to fight it. After all, she had taken care of him plenty of times when he was sick. Maybe some sort of internal voice was reminding him that it was time to repay the favor.

_I wonder if I can get him to rub some Vicks on my chest._

Woah. Penny's eyes opened and she frowned. Where did that come from?

"No, I'm not getting you a shirt," Howard was arguing with Raj. "What if we end up wearing it on the same day? How stupid would that look," he scoffed. "No, we'll get you one of those _Twilight_ books to carry around."

Raj whispered in his ear.

"Fine, fine, we'll get you one of those 'Team Jacob' shirts." Howard threw his hands in the air.

Raj beamed happily and bit into another slice of his pizza.

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_A/N: I just want to point out that I am not a Twilight fan and therefore not a "Team" anything, so please don't flame me. :P Twilight and True Blood are only used in the context of providing light humor._

_The next chapter is going to be a bit more Penny/Sheldon-centered, so stay tuned!_

_And again...reviews are love. :3_


	5. Chapter 5

**The Paradigm Alteration**

Chapter Five

"Penny?"

Penny gasped and jumped when a hand caught her shoulder and jerked her awake.

"Oh god," She caught sight of Leonard's face and fell back on her pillow, clutching her chest and taking in deep breaths.

"Sorry," Leonard offered a sheepish smile. "Didn't mean to scare you. It's been two hours."

"Uh huh," Penny reached up and felt around her bandage, wincing as the bruising still hurt to touch it. "Well, I'm awake and feeling okay, so you can go back to sleep now," she said as she settled back down and pulled the blanket over her. She was eager to go back to sleep. She wouldn't admit it to anyone, but their couch was actually more comfortable than her bed.

"Sheldon said I should ask you one of these questions," Leonard trailed off as he picked up a piece of paper that was on the coffee table. "Um, where were you born?" He asked, feeling a bit silly.

"Nebraska," she muttered.

"I think it's supposed to be the city...but that's good enough for me. Good night!" He gave her a quick smile before putting down the paper and hurrying away, obviously eager to return to sleep.

"Mhmm," she trailed off as sleep claimed her once more.

...

"Penny?" A soft tapping on her shoulder. "Penny?" Tap, tap, tap. "Penny?"

"Mph?" Penny's head lolled to the side and she opened her eyes. "Sheldon?" She croaked, blinking into the darkness.

"Yes, it's me," his voice came from above her in a whisper. "What's your address?"

She told him without hesitating and he seemed satisfied.

"Oh good, I was hoping you'd be recovering nicely."

"You were?" She frowned, rubbing her eyes and trying to squint up at him.

"Oh yes, a trip to the hospital at this time of night would put off tomorrow's bowel movements," he explained, turning around and walking towards the kitchen.

"Well I'm happy for you and your bowels," she replied sarcastically, sitting up on the couch.

"As am I," he opened the fridge and the light illuminated his face. She noticed the little smile on his lips.

Penny shook her head and smiled to herself. It was really the simple things that he valued the most. "What are you doing?" She asked him, fully awake now.

"I usually partake in a glass of warm milk before bedtime," he explained, pulling out the carton of milk.

"But that was hours ago," Penny pointed out, confused.

"Yes, and now I'm about to do it all over again," Sheldon pointed out before closing the fridge and grabbing a mug from the cupboard.

"You plan on doing this every time you wake me up and go back to sleep?" She asked, incredulous.

A pause. "Yes," he answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. He measured out exactly a half a glass of milk and placed the mug in the microwave.

"Sheldon," Penny stood up and walked toward the island in the kitchen. She stopped to turn on the single light over the sink. "You really don't have to do this. I'm fine, really," she insisted, feeling bad for all the trouble everyone was going through.

"Now, now," he insisted, putting away the carton of milk. "You already possess limited mental capabilities, and I would hate to be the reason should they be diminished even further."

"Gee thanks," she rolled her eyes.

"You're welcome," he replied hesitantly, clearly uncertain with his answer. His body jerked to a stop as he reached for the microwave. He turned his head back towards her and narrowed his eyes. "Sarcasm?"

"Yeah," she replied, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm getting so much better at that," he remarked, pleased with himself.

Penny's head slumped into her arms on the counter before jerking back and yelping. "Ow!" She immediately brought her hand to cover the injured area. "Ohh, that did not feel good." She screwed her eyes shut. What on earth was she thinking, doing that?

"Penny," Sheldon's voice came from right next to her. "I wouldn't suggest doing that again."

"You think?" She snapped, her bruised skull throbbing.

"Ye-...oh," he caught on faster that time. "Well, let me see."

"See what?" She barely got the question out before his hands were gently prying away her hand from her forehead and peeling the edge of the medical tape off her skin. She was a little shocked at how gentle his touch was.

_Screw that, I'm shocked he's voluntarily touching me!_

Penny stood perfectly still and looked up at him as he peeled back the edge of her bandage and examined the cut on her forehead. He paused for a few moments and she noticed the muscle above his eye had started twitching.

"Is it bleeding again?" She asked, already knowing the answer.

"It appears your actions have caused the scab to crack and reopen the injury," Sheldon finally spoke, his hands working to peel the rest of the bandage off. His eye started twitching like mad as he touched more of the bandage.

"Ow," she whispered as a hair was pulled out of her head, obviously caught from under the tape.

"My apologies," he whispered from above her.

_What the..._

Penny closed her eyes involuntarily as it replayed over and over in her head. It sounded like the softest...most heartfelt apology she had ever heard.

_From Sheldon?_

Reality came crashing in and her eyes flew open. It had to have been the drugs she was on. Painkillers made people think crazy things, right? Didn't they work like alcohol in that sense?

Except she had only taken Tylenol...

"Be right back," he suddenly spoke and started walking away, the bandage carefully pinched in his fingers and held aloft as far from his body as his arm could extend it.

"Okay?" Penny responded and watched him as he left. Frowning to herself, she shook her head lightly, attempting to sort out what had just happened. Sheldon was being...extremely nice about all of this.

It was all so...surreal.

Not only in the sense that it was _Sheldon_ that was taking care of her, but also because she had never had a man volunteer to take care of her...ever. Her past boyfriends had usually made themselves scarce once they found out she was sick, sending sympathetic text messages here and there, but never really doing anything nice for her. Certainly never volunteering to actually help her get better.

He had to have been doing it because of all the times she took care of him. Plus, the fact that she wasn't contagious in any way must have been a bonus for him. A way to repay the favor without having to actually help out a sick person, right?

Though he didn't seem thrilled about touching that bloodied-up bandage...

"I had some medical tape in my emergency kit," Sheldon walked back into the kitchen, carrying a square package of gauze, a cleansing wipe, and a roll of tape. He had already put on surgical gloves. "Hopefully this time it won't stick to your hair." He began opening the cleansing wipe and pulling out the gauze.

Penny watched him as he began unrolling the tape and breaking off four equal-sized bits of tape. "I can put it on," she insisted, reaching for the gauze. "I'm sure I can do it with the mirror in the bathroom."

"Penny," he looked down at her and spoke slowly. "I'm a physicist with two PhDs. I think I know how to apply a bandage."

"I never said you couldn't," she replied, confused.

"Hold your hair back," he instructed, grabbing the tape pieces with his fingers.

Suddenly too tired to argue, she reached up and carefully pulled her hair back from her face, holding it back for him.

He reached forward and gently placed the gauze over her injury.

"Shouldn't we clean it up first?" She asked, eying the wipe that was sitting on the counter.

"It's not that bad," he replied distractedly, placing the first piece of tape over the gauze and flattening it out with his long fingers.

"You know, it's okay if the pieces of tape aren't even," she teased lightly, watching his face in amusement as he carefully laid out the second piece.

He chose not to answer her, and carefully continued until all four pieces were covering the gauze, securing it to her forehead. "All done," he averted her eyes and quickly stepped back. She hadn't noticed until now that he had been uncomfortable standing that close to her.

She watched as he snapped off the gloves and immediately reached for the cleansing wipe, cleaning his hands.

Normally she would be offended that he was taking all of these precautions before and after touching her, but she knew that it was just because of the open wound and seeping blood on her forehead.

"Thank you Sheldon," she said, the corner of her mouth curving upward. "I really appreciate it." It was really touching that he was doing all of this for her. She knew he was a complete germophobe and avoided touching other people at all costs.

"Yes, well," he shifted on his feet and stared at the floor for a moment before collecting the tape and the discarded wrapping. "Goodnight," he said abruptly, turning on his heel and walking back towards the hallway. He quickly disappeared around the corner.

"Um, goodnight?" She called after him and threw her arms out, confused. Standing in the dimly lit kitchen, she frowned and finally shook her head after a few moments. She walked back to the couch and slowly made herself comfortable on it.

"Nope," she finally spoke aloud. "Still a wacko."

She turned her head on the pillow and inhaled deeply, unconsciously aware of the smile on her face.

00000

_A/N : Nothing like a sweet encounter mixed with a bit of awkwardness. ;D So what do you guys think...is Penny starting to really notice Sheldon? Or is it just the head injury?_


	6. Chapter 6

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Six_

...

"Okay, let's see what all the fuss is about," Penny said as she opened the case for season one of Star Trek: The Original Series. "Of course, it's not like I have much of a choice," she grumbled to herself.

The boys had insisted that she stay in their apartment for the day. Leonard reminded her that her phone service was cut off. It didn't make much sense to stay in her apartment if she wasn't able to contact somebody in case of an emergency.

Honestly, she thought they were all blowing the whole situation out of proportion, but she went along with it. Quite frankly, she didn't have any money for groceries. The boys had a fully-stocked kitchen filled with food. Couldn't hurt to stay for just one day and mooch a little, could it?

After all, it was their fault she wasn't working for the next couple of days.

Sighing, she popped the DVD into the player and sat back down on the couch, sprawling all over Sheldon's spot. It felt good to finally be able to sit on that end of the couch without those annoying complaints from Sheldon.

Penny popped her feet on top of the coffee table and started the first episode on the disk. "Heck, I think I could get used to this," Penny grinned and settled in.

_Riiiing._

"Oh, balls," Penny sighed and grabbed the remote. She quickly pressed 'mute' before picking up the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey Penny, it's Leonard."

"Hey Leonard," Penny replied. "What's up?"

"Nothing much, just checking in to see how you're doing," his voice sounded whiny, even through the phone.

"I'm fine, Leonard," Penny sighed, "You left here an hour ago. Not much has changed."

"Okay, just checking! Call me if you need anything," he added quickly.

"Sure, bye," Penny hung up the phone without waiting for a reply. She wasn't quite used to ex-boyfriends being so nice and friendly after a break-up. Normally, she would assume they were trying to get in her pants again, but this was Leonard. He really was a sweet guy. Unfortunately, he just wasn't the guy for her.

Something was lacking in that relationship, and she could never quite pinpoint the problem. She had tried pretending everything was okay for quite a while, but that seemed to only make things worse. Soon thereafter, she came to resent their involvement and his insistence on continuing the relationship.

After the relationship had ended, she then came to realize that Leonard had ruined other men for her. The men she used to be attracted to were suddenly unappealing. In fact, while tending the bar one shift, she found herself on the receiving end of a flirtatious encounter from a very attractive man. Yet somehow she found herself annoyed with his droning about working out, owning a motorcycle, and hitting up all the local hot spots. Instead, she found her gaze frequently falling on the quiet, semi-attractive man at the end of the bar with exceedingly polite manners and an awkward smile.

Sighing, Penny shook her head and pressed the 'play' button on the remote. She shouldn't be thinking about men; she was recovering from a head injury. Not to mention the fact that she was in a financial crisis. A real financial crisis. She needed a way to stall the bills for a while, convince the landlord the rent was coming soon, and most importantly of all: find a better-paying job.

Yep, she would get right on that.

...Right after she finished this episode.

…

_Riiiing_.

"Hello?" Penny didn't even bother to hit the mute button. She was completely engrossed in the TV series. She had flown through three episodes and was ready for a fourth. It really was amazing.

"Penny?"

"Howard?" Penny's finger hit the mute button on reflex. She stared at the phone as if it were playing a prank on her.

"The one and only," his voice came through the line. "What was that I heard in the background?" He asked, curiosity piqued.

"Uh...nothing," she replied. "Howard, why are you calling me?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were comfortable. I mean, I know that tiny, tiny apartment can't provide much comfort for a poor, injured beauty such as yourself." She could practically feel the leer through the phone line. "And I just wanted to ask if you would prefer to recover in, perhaps, a much larger space? Possibly one with a fantastic cook who has offered to whip up anything your little heart desires?"

Penny shook her head. Nothing slowed Howard down. "Yeah, no. Tell your mother I said thanks, but I'm fine here," Penny replied, rolling her eyes.

"Who said anything about my mother? Oh, and for the record, my fridge is fully stocked with strawberries, chocolate, several bottles of wine, and edible underwear-"

Penny slammed the phone down back in its cradle and pressed play.

…

_Riiiing._

"Oh God, this is never going to end, is it?" Penny sighed and pressed 'pause'. "Hello?" She snapped into the phone as she picked it up.

"Oh good, you're awake."

"Why would I be asleep, Sheldon?" Penny threw her hands up in the air, frustrated.

"I'm given to understand that you frequently nap on afternoons when you aren't working," he replied.

"Well, I'm not. Can I help you with something?" She sighed, staring at the frozen television screen.

"Actually, that would be very helpful," Sheldon's voice came through as slightly surprised with her offer. "You will find a pizza take-out menu on my desk. Our usual order is circled. Call the number and place the order for pick-up. We will be paying with cash. Leonard and I are going to pick it up on the way home in an hour."

Penny frowned. "Wait a minute. You want me to order the pizza?"

"Yes. It's Wednesday." He paused. "Halo and pizza night."

"Why can't you order it?" She asked, confused.

"Leonard neglected to bring the take-out menu with us on our way out this morning," he explained.

"You can't order without the take-out menu in front of you?"

"How can I order if I can't see the menu?" Penny could hear the slight Texan accent surfacing as his annoyance grew.

"You order the same things every week," she pointed out, grinning. This was fun. In her mind, she could imagine him sitting behind a desk, staring at the phone as if it were Penny and developing a slight facial twitch below his eye.

When the line grew silent, Penny chuckled. "What's the matter, Mr. Spock? Can't handle a little teasing?" She asked in a softer voice.

"Teasing is only fun to those who are not the recipients," he finally answered in a low voice after a pause.

A twinge went through Penny's heart and she suddenly felt bad. Did he think she was making fun of him?

"Aww, sweetie, come on," she smiled reassuringly even though she knew he couldn't see it. "I wasn't making fun of you. Friends tease one another. I was only trying to have fun with you."

"Yes, well," he trailed off again.

"I'll order the pizza."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Have a good rest of the day," she added, trying to make up for the teasing.

"I have no control over that, Penny."

_Click._

…

"How do you like THAT, suckers?"

"Didn't even feel that!"

"How would you like a taste of your OWN medicine?"

"Ahh! MED-PACK! I NEED A MED-PACK!"

"I need a partner that isn't completely incompetent, but I don't see THAT happening anytime soon!"

"Damnit, he's right on me!"

"Guys?" Penny spoke up above the rest of them. "What was the point of turning the volume down if you're just going to scream and yell at the screen?"

"The doctor said you needed to be in a quiet environment," Leonard replied, not taking his eyes off the screen. His tongue poked outside the corner of his lips. "Aw, man! I almost had him!"

"Leonard, MOVE!"

"Yeah," Penny stared at the four men sitting around her. "This definitely qualifies as 'quiet'."

Her remark went ignored.

"Damnit Sheldon, I need a med-pack!"

"Another one?"

"Okay," Penny stood up. "Leonard? I'm going to sit in your room for a while." She picked up her laptop and walked past Leonard and Raj, blocking their view of the screen for a few moments.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" They cried in unison.

"What?" Penny spun around, confused and alarmed.

"Haha, you MISSED!"

"And now you're out of life," Sheldon pressed a button on his controller, an oddly sadistic look on his face as Leonard and Raj's characters were blown to bits.

"Damnit!" Leonard sagged back into his chair, throwing his controller to the ground.

"We were so-eep!" Raj quickly turned around and looked straight at Penny.

"What? Just suddenly noticing I'm here?" She raised an eyebrow. "I've been here the whole time." She threw her arms out.

"Once he gets into the game, he doesn't really notice what's going on around him," Howard explained, setting down his controller. "Although how he could miss those tight sweatpants hugging those exquisite curv,-"

"Howard!" Leonard cut him off with a disapproving look. Raj snuck a peek at Penny's sweatpants.

"What? I'm just saying those,-"

"Penny, you've left your second slice in the pizza box," Sheldon cut him off this time, holding the pizza box aloft in his hands. He raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I wasn't really hungry," she placed her laptop back down on the coffee table.

"Then would you please wrap it up and place it in the refrigerator?" He asked, holding out the pizza box.

"Um, sure," she shrugged, reaching for the pizza box and turning towards the kitchen.

"Be sure to label it 'Penny'" He called after her, getting up to clear off the coffee table.

"Why?" She turned around and frowned.

"Oh, here we go," Leonard sighed.

"Why? Because that's your slice," Sheldon reiterated. "We each pay a portion of the pizza, and therefore each get an equal amount of its distribution."

"Oh, yeah, about that..." Penny trailed off.

"It's fine, Penny," Leonard held up a hand. "Don't worry about it."

"No, no, I'm tired of you doing this, Leonard," Penny sighed. It pained her terribly to grab her purse from the counter and reach inside for what little cash she had at the bottom of it. It had been an automatic thing to eat take-out with them. She had forgotten about that tiny detail of actually paying for it.

"Doing what?" Leonard asked, sounding confused.

"Here," Penny held out the cash, annoyed when he didn't take it right away. "Damnit, Leonard, would you just,-"

"Um, you don't owe me anything," he tried to explain.

"No, I do," she insisted. "You're not just going to keep buying me food because you feel bad for me."

"No, I mean...you owe Sheldon." Leonard trailed off, finger pointing in Sheldon's direction.

"I...what?" Penny's hand dropped back to her side.

"I paid your portion, Penny," Sheldon finally broke the silence with his admission. He picked up the last plate from the coffee table and carried them over to the kitchen, placing them in the sink.

"Oh," Penny stood there for a moment, then turned around and held out her hand. "Okay. That's weird. Here."

He turned from rinsing the dishes in the sink to glance briefly at the cash in her hand. His eyes momentarily skimmed over her face and then turned around, continuing with the dishes.

Penny sighed, annoyed. She was embarrassed by the fact that she had assumed Leonard had paid for her portion. She was further embarrassed by the fact that she was still holding out cash into empty air. Worst of all, she was near-crying inside once she realized that she was holding her last bit of cash. That was it. She was officially broke.

Trying desperately not to break into tears, she finally took four angry steps forward, grabbed Sheldon's pants by the pocket, ignored the awkward noise that came out of his mouth, thrust the money into his back pocket, and, taking pointers from Leonard's once-drunk mother, ran her fingers over his ass as she removed her hand from his pocket. Satisfied with her actions, she pat her hand over the back pocket and sauntered away.

"If you'll excuse me, I'll go brush my teeth and then I'll be back," Penny said, walking straight for their apartment door.

Once the door shut behind her, all three boys in the living room looked over to the kitchen, where Sheldon was still standing, facing the sink. He was rock-still, hands poised in the air as if for balance. The sink tap ran steadily in the background.

The three boys turned their confused faces towards one another.

"Seriously," Howard broke the silence. "What the frack was that?"

00000

_A/N: Bwahahaha. Sorry. That was too much fun. ;D Comments appreciated!_


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: How lame am I? I just realized you can reply to reviews. Awesome. Keep the comments coming, guys! They're great inspiration and now I can REPLY to you! :D Haha._

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Seven_

Penny sighed and pulled her knees closer to her chest, perched on her couch. Her teeth were brushed, her pajamas were on, and even though she told the boys she'd be back, there really wasn't any reason to. Her head, although bruised and cut, was in no danger of brain injury. It had been over 24 hours since she had hit her head. The boys had woken her up every two hours last night, and she was fine. There wasn't any reason to go back and sleep over again.

_Although that couch is comfortable_.

Shaking her head, she let her forehead fall gently on the tops of her knees. The worst part was she didn't want to face everyone after her little lapse in judgment with Sheldon's pocket. She could only imagine what was going on over there. Sheldon was most likely horrified and going off on some lengthy explanation as to why Penny should no longer be allowed in the apartment again.

_Strike three!_

Even though it was disheartening to think about being banned from the boys' apartment, she couldn't help but smile a bit. That man and his crazy ideas. She couldn't imagine anyone else in the world giving strikes to friends as if they were children.

Another sigh escaped her lips. What was getting into her? Why was she so interested in Sheldon lately? It didn't make any sense. Yes, the man was a part of her life, but...she should be wanting to tear her hair out thinking about Sheldon's rules, not smiling about them. Maybe it was because he was the only one at the moment who seemed to genuinely care about her health. Plenty of people cared about Penny as a person, even about her feelings or opinions. But her health? Her overall state of comfort?

Other than her parents, she really couldn't picture anyone else. Maybe that's why she was paying more attention to him lately.

_But that doesn't really explain the reason for feeling him up through his back pocket._

Groaning, Penny lifted her forehead off her knees and replaced it with her cheek. She was too impulsive for her own good. That was definitely going to have repercussions.

_Click._

"What the,-" Penny's head jerked up as the power went out in her apartment. Sitting in near-total darkness, she cursed. Loudly.

_Knock knock knock. _"Penny?"

_Knock knock knock. _"Penny?"

_Knock knock knock. _"Penny?"

"Damnit Sheldon, the door is open!" she snapped, not wanting to attempt to locate the door in the dark. Knowing her luck, she'd end up with another injury.

The door opened hesitantly and light from the hallway flooded her apartment.

"Well, I guess that answers that question," Penny sighed.

"What question?" He stood in the doorway, a tall shadow blocking out the light from the hallway.

"I was hoping the entire building was out of power," Penny sighed. "Now I see it's just my electric company catching on to the fact that I haven't paid my bills."

"Why haven't you paid your bills?" He asked.

"In case you haven't noticed, I'm not exactly working, am I?" She threw her arms out, frustration quickly bubbling in her chest. Her previous somber mood had dissipated, and her previous fear of how Sheldon would react to her little stunt went out the window. Now she was just frustrated, plain and simple. "What do you want, Sheldon?"

Her voice seemed to snap his attention back, because he suddenly brought himself up to full height and locked his hands behind his back. He was in full 'condescension' mode. "Yes, well-".

"You know what?" Penny cut him off and threw a hand up in his direction. She couldn't deal with him right now. "Never mind, I don't want to hear it. Am I banished?"

"Banished?" She could have swore she heard slight confusion in his voice, but maybe that was just wishful thinking.

"Yeah. Banished. Look, I'm sorry I stuffed the money into your pocket. I'm sure you have some stupid rule about your pocket like you do about your room-"

"My room?"

"Yeah. 'People can't be in my room, Penny'," she imitated. "'People can't be in my pocket, Penny.'" She continued. "'People can't be in my office, Penny.'"

"Unfortunately, I have no control over that particular area. The university seems to believe that anyone has the right to meander into my work space without prior arrangement simply because the university owns the space. Never mind the fact that they gave me express permission to use it as a solitary work space,-"

"Sheldon!" She cut off his ramblings. "Just...never mind!" She frowned and tucked her knees even closer to her chest. "What are you doing here?"

"You've been gone for over an hour. Leonard sent me over here to make sure you weren't injured," he answered.

"Of course he did," Penny replied wryly. "I'm fine, I just..." she took in a breath. "I was just...embarrassed over what I did." She tried to explain how she was feeling. She knew it would be lost to him, but she attempted to anyway.

His head turned toward the floor. "You are referring to the incident involving your hand and my right buttock?"

"Yeah, that one," she shook her head, feeling a warmth spread over the bridge of her nose and seep into her cheeks. "I shouldn't have invaded your personal space, Sheldon. I'm sorry."

There was a long pause, and Penny kept glancing in his direction to make sure he was still there in the doorway. She was expecting him to tell her at any moment that she was no longer allowed in their apartment, or that she now had two strikes, or-

"Apology accepted."

Penny's head snapped up at the quiet response. "Oh," she blinked. Wasn't expecting _that_. "Well, thank you," she replied, still reeling over the fact that Sheldon Lee Cooper was letting someone off the hook for groping him in the middle of his kitchen. _Without even a strike?_

"Are you planning on sleeping here with no power?" He ignored her response, and put his hands behind his back once more.

"Well, it might get a little hot with no air conditioning," she trailed off. "It's not like I can do anything about it, though." She shrugged lightly. Inside, she was crying. This wasn't the first time her power had been cut off. She closed her eyes and sighed. Maybe her dreams of becoming an actress were just a waste of time. Maybe she should start to think about getting a real job, one that paid more than just the bills. Having good health insurance would also be a bonus.

But...she'd be giving up her dreams.

"I find that," he started loudly, then seemed to realize his volume and coughed lightly. His head dropped to the floor once more, and he continued in a lower voice. "I find that your...presence in our apartment, provided you aren't engaging in loud coitus in Leonard's room, is not as much of an intrusion as I had expected."

"Were we that loud?" Penny bit her lip, embarrassed to realize that Sheldon had heard them.

"It created a need to purchase noise-canceling headphones," he replied sharply. "And interfered with my sleep patterns more than once."

"Oh, god, I'm sorry sweetie," Penny apologized, shaking her head. It never bothered her to think about interrupting Sheldon's daily schedule, but for some reason, it really bothered her now.

"Yes, well, that rude invasion of my sleep cycle has seemingly come to an end," he replied lightly.

"Yes it has," Penny nodded as well. "And it won't happen again," she added.

"You have no control over that," Sheldon replied.

"Considering I won't be sleeping with Leonard again? I think I do."

"Leonard may choose to take another sexual partner," he pointed out.

"Oh, well, yeah," she chuckled. "Obviously."

"Then you cannot possibly say with any authority that it won't happen again," he insisted.

"Well, how about this," Penny smiled up at him. "If Leonard does find another girlfriend, I'll let you stay over here to get away from any noise. Then you can have a good night's sleep and it won't ruin your sleep cycle." She grinned at him.

"I can't possibly get away from any noise if I'm over here," he stated.

"They can't be _that_ loud."

"I was referring to your snoring."

"Hey!" She frowned. "You know what? Just for that I think I _am_ going to sleep on your couch tonight. I'll snore extra-loud just to bother you, too." She stood up and started to walk out the door.

"Unlikely," he countered, looking down at her as she passed him. "The decibel at which you currently snore is already higher than most people." He shut her door.

"Yeah, well, get the headphones ready, mister. Tonight, I'm not taking my allergy medication."

00000

_A/N: Just a short chapter for now. ;D I promise the next one is going to be better. It'll be the first chapter from Sheldon's point of view. :O Wish me luck! :D_


	8. Chapter 8

**The Paradigm Alteration**

Chapter Eight

_Black. White. Black. White._

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

_Black. White. Black. White._

Sheldon blinked, then turned his head away from his laptop screen to glance at the clock. Noting the time, he then turned towards three white boards that were filled with equations and littered with string theory doodling. He had worked for exactly three and a half hours before it was time to break for lunch. He made his usual daily selection, listened to Leonard, Wolowitz, and Koothrappali as they regaled pointless tales of women-chasing, reminded them of the paintball strategy meeting in his office at 2:30 p.m., and returned to his office.

He had poured over his white boards for the past hour, attempting to devise an experiment that would detect very low energy coupling constants. Experimental physics was occasionally a necessary part in his work at the university.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

Bringing his eyes back to the clock, a breath escaped his lips. He could feel an annoyed expression reaching across his face. It was now 2:45 p.m., and his fellow paintball team members had not yet arrived for the strategy meeting.

_Black. White. Black. White._

He focused his attention on the open document in front of him and watched as the text cursor blinked over and over again. He hadn't quite rationalized the need for opening the document; he just knew it should be open. A notion was hovering over his head, and when the idea inevitably revealed itself to him, he would be ready.

It wasn't usual for Sheldon to bring his laptop to work. He usually preferred the electronic-free zone that his office provided. With only white boards, markers, texts, and his achievements surrounding him, he was able to work quite efficiently. However, on this Thursday morning, something seemed to be pressing upon him. It manifested itself in a physical abnormality, delaying his usual morning bowel movement and distracting him in maddening ways. It had been distracting him for several days now, and he could not seem to figure out what it was that was pressing on him and disrupting his work.

He had considered seeking medical attention, as nothing like this had ever happened before. Well, perhaps once, Sheldon conceded to himself. The incident involving the loss of his job certainly put his mind on a fast-track to anything that caught his attention. He wasn't able to focus on one particular matter for very long.

_Beep. Beep._

Sheldon's cell phone rang from his pocket. Awkwardly shifting in his seat, he managed to pull out the phone from his pocket. Examining the caller ID, he felt himself straightening immediately as soon as he saw his own home phone number across the screen.

"Hello?" He answered.

"Sheldon?" Penny's voice came through the line.

"Yes," he answered lightly, all the while pondering why it was she felt the need to ask. After all, she was the one who had placed the call.

"Hey, um, I just got a text from Leonard," she began slowly, and he could hear her hesitation.

"If you are calling for advice on appropriate social responses, I can assure you that I will be of no help," he responded immediately.

"No, not that," she replied, and in his mind, he could see her rolling her eyes. "It says that they've all left for a night out in Hollywood."

Sheldon felt his eyebrows furrowing. "But it's 2:45," he interjected. "The work day has not come to an end."

"Yeah, well, they said it was 'Anything-Could-Happen-Thursday', and they decided grab an early dinner before heading out to Hollywood to, quote, 'catch some good-looking fish'."

"I assume that particular text was from Wolowitz," Sheldon responded dryly.

"Naturally," Penny replied. "They also said that Howard's mother had a coupon for Olive Garden, so that's where they are now."

"Lunch was a mere two hours ago," Sheldon protested, flabbergasted that they would even think about having another meal so quickly.

"I don't know what to tell you, Sheldon," Penny sighed. "That's all the information they gave me. Apparently they'll be back late. Although, it's nearly 3. If they're getting started this early, I don't think they'll last very long."

"Well, I should hope not," Sheldon retorted, a bit louder than he intended. "Tomorrow is a work day. Leonard has to drive me to work." His shoulders straightened again and he gripped the edge of his desk as he came to a sudden realization. "Today is a work day. Leonard is supposed to drive me home!"

"I know, I know," Penny replied, and Sheldon could tell that she was attempting to calm him. "It's okay. I'm going to leave here in a little bit to come and pick you up."

"_You're _going to be driving me home?" Sheldon felt alarm rise in his throat. What was happening? When did everything suddenly change?

"Yes, Sheldon, _I'm _going to be picking you up," she snapped back at him. "If you don't like it, you can take the bus!"

"I don't have my bungee cords!" Sheldon protested.

"Then I guess you're just going to have to suck it up and ride home with me," Penny snapped, clearly upset.

Sheldon's mind was working three steps ahead, as usual. Today was Thursday. Anthing-Could-Happen-Thursday. Thursdays were quickly becoming the bane of his existence. Penny would drive him home. Penny is not a good driver. The bus has become a much more terrifying mode of transportation ever since they took away the seat belts. Penny's car had seat belts. Penny's check engine light was still on.

Penny's car can drive to the comic book store.

Sheldon blinked. "Alright, Penny, you may pick me up on the condition that we stop by the comic book store on the way home."

A long, drawn out sigh came through the line. "Sheldon?"

"Yes?"

"If I take you to the comic book store, will you promise to shut your hole for the rest of the evening?"

"Unlikely," he answered honestly. "I will, however, allow you to choose the take-out restaurant between the choices of pizza, chinese, or thai."

Sheldon waited as a short pause came through the line. "Um, Sheldon, I don't think I can really afford to eat take-out again," she replied hesitantly. "You know, I have some of that Mama's Spaghetti Marinara sauce that you like so much...maybe we can swing by the grocery store and get some pasta?"

Sheldon sat and pondered this response, mentally filing it away for future reference. "With little cut-up hot dogs?"

"Of course, sweetie," Penny chuckled.

"That would be acceptable. Pick me up in an hour." He replied shortly, bringing an end to the conversation.

"Okay, see you soon!"

"Not soon...in an hour!" Sheldon corrected her, but it was too late as she had already ended the call. He sighed and placed the cell phone back in his pocket.

Penny was refusing take-out?

Sheldon leaned forward and placed his elbows on the desk and interlaced his fingers, resting his chin lightly atop his linked hands. His mind went to work. Penny. Penny's lack of funds for take-out. Penny's lack of funds for her bills. Penny's injured forehead. Blood. Penny's fingers running over his buttocks.

Sheldon straightened once again and dropped his hands to his desk. A slight warmth spread up the back of his neck. That particular incident was most disturbing to him. His lack of an appropriate response to Penny's actions baffled him. He assumed his response would have been one of shock and disinterest, possibly even a mild annoyance to her touch. Instead, he was left standing at the sink feeling shock and what he later identified as a mild curiosity.

Perhaps his recent actions regarding her head injury had been perceived by Penny as some sort of social implication that he was seeking a more intimate friendship. Certainly he had baffled the other members of their group by assisting Penny in recovering from her head injury. He had even rendered Leonard speechless when he offered to pay Penny's portion of their pizza the previous night. He was certain that they were confused as to why he was suddenly taking an interest in her.

He, however, was not so confused as to the reason.

_Blood._

_Guilt._

"_Penny? Penny?"_

Sheldon shook his head lightly as if to erase the visuals that sprang to his mind. This was most likely the only incident where his eidetic memory was not something he found helpful. He had watched as Penny rushed into her apartment – _to get away from him –_ and turned to shut the door – _to get away from him –_ and fell, her skull bouncing off of the corner of her coffee table before falling to the floor in a heap.

Sheldon had stood there for exactly 2.5 seconds before rushing forward, although it had oddly seemed longer. Penny's forehead was bleeding, the blood falling backward into her blonde hair in a thin red ribbon, slowly seeping away from the cut. Sheldon stood frozen, eyes widened. Blood, in a general sense, did not bother him. The thought of touching blood, however, did.

"_Penny? Penny?"_

His laptop screen winked out, indicating that it had gone into sleep mode. Thankful for the distraction, he firmly put those thoughts and memories out of his mind. They had no purpose, and no meaning at this time. Penny had woken up and recovered from her injury. Sheldon had contributed to her recovery. Their increased involvement was now over and they could go back to the way they were before the incident had occurred. He, the genius, and she, the waitress across the hall.

…

"Sheldon, can you reach that box of spaghetti?" Penny's voice broke into Sheldon's thoughts.

Sheldon looked up to the shelf, and then back down to Penny. "That shelf is not beyond your reach," he pointed out, clutching his arms tighter across his chest, where he was clutching a bag filled with three new comic books.

"Not the front box, I want the one behind it," she replied, pointing to it.

"That's the generic brand," Sheldon stated.

"Yeah?"

"I don't eat generic brands," Sheldon shook his head.

"Then I guess you're paying for the pasta," Penny snapped, reaching up and grabbing the brand name spaghetti and placing it in the shopping cart.

"Alright," he replied, puzzled as to her violent reaction. "Penny, are you experiencing some sort of financial trouble again?" He asked. "I can loan you money," he offered.

"No, Sheldon, I don't want to borrow any of your money," Penny sighed, turning the cart toward the meat aisle. Sheldon followed.

"So you _are_ having financial difficulties?" He persisted.

"Just...some," she finally answered him. Stopping the cart, she turned around to look at him. "Do you have a specific hot dog brand you buy?"

His eyes grazed the top of the band-aid she had placed over her cut before turning in the direction of the hot dog selection. Finding his usual hot dog packaging, he picked it up and placed it in the cart.

"Whack-a-doodle," Sheldon heard Penny remark under her breath. He frowned, curious. He was under the impression most people only purchased one particular brand of food they enjoyed. Obviously Penny shopped according to price, not quality.

They approached the checkout, and Sheldon paid for their items. As they began walking out of the store, Sheldon brought up the subject again, not one to be deterred.

"Penny, I find it disturbing that you are not able to pay your bills on your income as a waitress full-time. Is there some reason why you are unable to afford your bills?"

Penny groaned, and quickly got into her car. "Sheldon, I really don't want to talk about it. I'm just...behind on my bills. That's all."

Sheldon folded his limbs and slid into the passenger seat of Penny's car. Taking great care not to hit his head on the door frame, he shut the door and put his seat belt on. He placed the bag of food at his feet and his comic books across his lap.

"Seat belt," he reminded her.

"Right," she nodded distractedly as she started the car, reaching back and putting her belt on.

"Perhaps waitressing at The Cheesecake Factory does not provide enough income for you," Sheldon continued, ignoring her huff of anger. "Have you considered finding a new line of employment?" He turned to look at her as she drove.

"I have, Sheldon," she snapped. "But unfortunately, waitressing is pretty much all I have, which makes my resume look pretty damn pathetic."

He considered that for a moment. "Not to mention your education heading would be considered quite thin," he added.

"Thank you for pointing that out, Sheldon," she bit out.

"You're welcome," he replied. Penny seemed to thank him for a lot of things that angered her, he noticed. "Getting back to the original conundrum, have you perhaps given some thought into searching for an entry-level position elsewhere?"

"Sheldon, I've been looking for jobs online all day," she finally admitted after a pause. "I've sent out resumes to several different companies, but I have a feeling they're just going to take one look at it and laugh."

"Why would they laugh?" Sheldon asked. "Did you preface the resume with some sort of humorous joke?"

Sheldon watched as Penny's head slowly turned in his direction, a glare in her eyes. Swallowing slightly, he awkwardly turned his head back to the road in front of him. He did not wish to be left on the side of the road, and so he remained relatively quiet the whole way home, speaking only to remind her of stop signs and traffic lights. These reminders were seemingly unappreciated, and he noticed that Penny took great pleasure in pressing too heavily on the breaks each time. Sheldon could have swore he noticed slight smiles as he flew forward at every stop and hit his head on the shade. Yes, it seemed that everything had gone back to the way it was before.

…

"Sheldon, I have to touch your food. I'm making it," Penny protested lightly as she looked up from cutting the hot dogs into small pieces.

From his perch at the island counter, Sheldon looked up above his laptop screen where he was currently searching for something. "I understand that you must touch the food, Penny, I'm not a child," he replied lightly. "I'm simply supervising the task."

"Supervising?" Penny stopped cutting and her voice dropped a register.

"Yes, much like a superior," he explained, baffled as to how she could go through her twenty-something years without understanding the meaning of the word 'supervising'.

If he had been looking above his laptop screen, he would have seen Penny narrowing her eyes and poking the hot dog bits several times with her bare finger.

As it was, he was currently occupied reading something he had found on the university website.

_Administrative Assistant needed for a temporary assignment in the Humanities department. The department is seeking an individual with superior organizational, time management, and problem solving skills. Position reports to the department chair. Please forward resume and references to Dr. Muller, Department Chair._

With the exception of the superior organizational skills, Sheldon thought Penny just might be able to muster enough effort to meet the demands of the position. The pay was modest, but based on a rough calculation of her rent and bills, Sheldon surmised it should be enough for her to live on and save a bit. Provided she could manage to actually save money before spending it on _shoes, _of all things.

He had never met this Dr. Muller, most likely due to the fact that he was working in the humanities department, a subject Sheldon found too elementary for his superior mind. Nevertheless, he would concede that for some lesser minds, heading a department such as humanities would be considered an honor and a position of worth.

Sheldon glanced up at the pot on the stove. "Water's boiling, Penny," he pointed out before opening up a new program window and easily hacking into Penny's email account. He shook his head in disappointment. queenpenelope123 was not a secure password. He would have to find a time to discuss that information with her later. Going through her sent folder, Sheldon located a copy of her resume and opened it up.

He couldn't stop his right eyebrow from rising up as he took a look at the _single, half-page_ resume that contained absolutely no proper formatting whatsoever. Sighing heavily, he went about fixing the document, formatting it correctly. He also added an objective, skills, and provided higher-level vocabulary to her existing current job summary. Near the bottom, he listed himself, Leonard, Wolowitz, and Koothrappali as references.

Finishing it up, he opened up a form cover letter and addressed it to Dr. Muller. Once completed, he saved the document to his desktop. Opening up Penny's email once again, he addressed an email to Dr. Muller and emailed both the cover letter and the resume. Quickly closing the window and shutting the cover to his laptop, he noticed that Penny had finished cooking the pasta, and was pouring sauce over the two bowls in front of her.

"Okay, all finished!" Penny smiled triumphantly and beamed at him, clearly proud of her cooking.

Thinking back to proper social convention, he gave her an awkward smile back. "Mmm mmm mmm," he stood up and reached for a bowl. "Now that's I-talian."

Penny laughed, remembering the last time she cooked this meal for him, and followed him to the couch, sitting next to him. "So, what are we watching tonight? Battlestar? Discovery Channel? Some boring physics lecture?"

"Oh no," Sheldon straightened slightly and reached for the remote. "This is 'Anything-Can-Happen-Thursday, Penny. We're going to watch the original series of Star Trek." A goofy smile slid across his lips. Pasta with little cut-up hot dogs and Star Trek. In his mind, there wasn't anything that could make this night any better.

"Ohh fun! Can we start on 'Dagger of the Mind'? I finished through 'Miri' the other day."

Sheldon's face fixed into an expression of sheer confusion and bewilderment as he turned slowly from the television to the grinning woman sitting next to him.

00000

_A/N: Whew! Sheldon's mind is a beautiful and complicated thing. ;D Will write for reviews! :)_


	9. Chapter 9

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Nine_

"So have you guys checked out the new lab assistant that works on Tuesdays and Thursdays?" Howard asked in between bites of his chinese food. "She is ho-ot," he sang as Raj nodded his head in approval of Howard's antics.

Leonard frowned. "The brunette with the little ponytail?" He asked.

"Yeah," Howard replied.

"That's a man," Leonard took a bite of his dumpling.

Penny and Sheldon turned slowly to look at Howard.

"What? There's no way," Howard protested, looking around as if looking for help.

"You ever talk to her?" Leonard asked.

"Well, no..."

"Do you just stare at her ass whenever you pass by?" Penny contributed.

"Well, yes..."

"Take a better look next time, Howard, his name is David," Leonard took a sip from his water bottle.

Raj pointed and silently laughed at Howard.

"What are you laughing at?" Howard narrowed his eyes. "At least I didn't buy him dinner and kiss him_._"

Raj's face paled at the memory of that particular incident at Comi-con.

_Riiing._

"Fascinating," Sheldon commented at the scene before him before reaching over and picking up the cordless phone. "Hello? Oh, yes, of course, just one moment." He turned towards Penny, handing the phone to her. "It's for you."

Penny quickly turned to face him, a spaghetti noodle dangling from her lips. She looked at him as if he were insane before slurping up the noddle, splashing bits of tomato sauce over her chin. "For me?" She asked, wiping her chin with a napkin. "Who would be calling me here?"

"Considering your cell phone is no longer functional, I can only assume you placed our phone number on those resumes you claimed to have sent out," Sheldon replied easily, nodding toward the phone once more. "Take it."

"Wait, what resumes?" Leonard spoke up, suddenly confused. "You're looking for a new job?"

"Long story," Penny replied before taking the phone and walking towards the door to the hallway. "I'll be right back," she told the boys before walking out and shutting the door behind her. "Hello?" She spoke cheerfully into the phone. Penny's rule number one to landing a job: appear cheerful and perky, even if you aren't.

"Hello, am I speaking to Penelope?" A female voice came through the line.

"Yes, this is Penny," she corrected slightly. Only her mother referred to her as Penelope. She suddenly frowned. She could have swore she only put 'Penny' on her applications. Shaking her head, she let it go. Perhaps she made a mistake on one of them.

"Hello, this is Dr. Muller from Cal Tech University," the voice continued. "I'm so sorry to be calling you so late. I just found a moment to review resumes, and I knew I had to call you right away. Your cover letter left quite an impression," Dr. Muller seemed pleased. "Not many people include a cover letter with their resumes anymore."

Penny gripped the phone tighter. University? Resume? Cover letter? "Oh, well, I'm...glad you liked it," Penny replied lamely. What the heck was a cover letter?

"I did, very much so," Dr. Muller replied. "Even though I see you don't have any administrative assistant experience, I do see that you've listed some valuable skills here. I'm also impressed by the fact that you listed four well-known employees here at the university as references."

Penny nearly dropped the phone. When did she apply to a university? And since when does anybody put skills on a resume? She listed four people as references? Penny's mind was working faster than she thought possible.

_Just go with it. It's a job opportunity. It doesn't matter how they got your information. It sounds like she wants to hire you._

Nodding to herself, Penny swallowed slightly. A university? Could she even work at one of those? She always thought a degree of some kind would be required to work there. Why on earth would this Dr. Muller be interested in her?

"I'd like to have you come in for an interview," Dr. Muller continued, and Penny could hear rustling in the background. "Would Monday be too soon for you?"

"Oh, no, Monday is perfect," Penny lied. She had a shift at The Cheesecake Factory on Monday.

"Great! What time would work best for you?"

"Whenever you're free," Penny replied quickly, hoping she would pick a time in the evening. She was supposed to work the lunch shift, but maybe she could switch with someone for a later time. She bit her lip. Then again, most people hardly ever wanted to give up a dinner shift.

"How about," Dr. Muller trailed off, and she could hear rustling papers once more. "11:30? Will that work for you?"

"It's perfect," Penny replied tightly. She would have to give up her lunch shift. Great.

"Great! I will see you then! If you don't mind, I'll just email the details to you."

"That's perfect, thank you so much," Penny replied. "I'm looking forward to meeting you."

"As am I!" Dr. Muller replied. "Have a good evening."

"Thank you, you too," Penny replied before hanging up the phone. Frowning, she stared at it for a moment longer.

She did _not_ apply to any university. She didn't even know what a cover letter was. She certainly didn't include any 'skills' on her resume.

_Four well-known employees at Cal Tech University..._

Narrowing her eyes, Penny felt her hand clench around the phone.

"SHELDON!" She roared, not caring if she was disturbing any of the neighbours. There was a crashing noise, and Penny heard the door open behind her.

"What's going on?"

"Is everything okay?"

Ignoring Howard and Leonard, Penny turned around slowly. Looking past the three boys standing behind her, Penny saw Sheldon, still seated in his spot. He was looking directly at her, chopsticks poised over his container of brown rice.

"Everything's fine," Penny bit out, her eyes still narrowed in on Sheldon. "I just need to talk to Sheldon."

"Sheldon? Why?" Leonard turned to face the man on the couch. "What did you do this time?" He sighed.

"It's nothing, Leonard, just let me handle this," Penny hissed, pushing his shoulder away so she could poke her head in the apartment once more. "Sheldon. Hallway. Now." She glared at him.

"Alright," Sheldon leaned over and carefully put down his brown rice. He stood slowly, reaching his full height. Taking great care to rearrange his shirts so that they were smooth against his body, he then lifted his head a centimeter higher than it should be and made his way to the door, ignoring the gaping curiosity on the three faces he passed.

Once he was finally in the hallway, he carefully closed the door behind him and placed his arms behind his back.

"Yes?" He asked finally, eyebrow raised.

"Sheldon, I'm only going to ask you one time. What. Did. You. Do?" Penny bit out her question, still clenching the phone in her grasp.

"Well, this morning I came one step closer to solving-,"

"I meant with _this_," Penny cried, waving the phone in his face. "Why is a professor from the university calling me about a job?"

"That was Dr. Muller?" Sheldon's eyebrows shot up in surprise, giving him away.

Penny's body drained of anger and was quickly replaced with frustration and disappointment. "Sheldon," she sighed. "Why? Just...please, answer me that. Why?"

"Well," she saw him glance up at her bandage for a moment. "You needed a new place of employment."

"Sheldon, how did you send out my resume? Why would you even bother to try and help me?" She pleaded, trying to make sense of it all.

"I located your resume in the sent folder of your mail account. I fixed the resume and added an appropriate cover letter. I sent it to Dr. Muller because the salary would more than cover the cost of your rent and bills," Sheldon rattled off the reasons in a clinical fashion. "In addition, the job requirements were not beyond your abilities."

"That's an invasion of my privacy!" Penny shouted. "How did you get into my mail account?" She demanded.

"I was able to deduce your mail password," he replied, blinking. "Penny, I'm not at all certain if I'm understanding this situation correctly. Are you telling me that helping out one's friends contains within it an inherent obligation to keep to the social construct of allowing one's friend privacy?"

Penny blinked, then shook her head. Sheldon was trying to help her? Wait...Sheldon _was _trying to help her. "Sheldon," her voice came out in a whine. "Sweetie, I understand that you're trying to help me in your own crazy little way. I appreciate it, I really do, but this job involves working for a university!"

"And?" Sheldon asked, clearly confused as to where the problem lay.

"I don't have a degree!" Penny cried, throwing out her arms. "I'm not smart!"

"Penny, I hardly believe answering phones, scheduling appointments, and filing documents hardly requires any sort of specialized degree," Sheldon replied. "Or a certain level of intelligence," he added.

"But-," Penny protested.

"Penny, this position is located within the humanities department," he continued. "English," he clarified in simple terms once he noticed the look of confusion on her face.

"Oh," Penny felt her body relax slightly. "Okay, well, that's not bad. I took English in high school."

"Humanities also covers such areas as philosophy and history," he added.

"Okay," Penny nodded. "Well, that doesn't sound too scary. I mean," she waved a hand in his direction. "It's nothing like what you guys do."

Sheldon remained silent as she continued speaking, seemingly to herself.

"Yeah, that doesn't sound so bad. I can answer a phone. I can schedule appointments. I can pretend I've read Shakespeare, I mean...well, I've read all the _Cliff's Notes_ from high school." She rambled on, nodding to herself with each statement. "But, what about my acting career?" She sighed.

"Penny," Sheldon interrupted lightly. "The position is from Monday to Friday. It is also a temporary assignment, most likely no longer than six months."

"Oh," Penny blinked. "Well, then I could still work at The Cheesecake Factory on the weekends...and I could continue looking for acting jobs once the six months are up." Her eyes widened slightly. "Wait! What about Tuesdays?" She looked up at him, shocked that he hadn't expressed any sort of argument over the fact that she wouldn't be serving him his Tuesday cheeseburger anymore.

"I have already anticipated the matter, Penny," Sheldon straightened once more. "Should you be offered the position, your work day will end at 4:00 p.m., which would give you approximately one hour and fifteen minutes to come home, change, and arrive at The Cheesecake Factory in time to take our order."

Penny's eyes narrowed.

…

"Well, fine, maybe the new lab assistant really _is _a man," Howard retorted, finishing off his food. "But you have to admit, from behind, he is pretty hot."

Leonard turned and frowned at Howard. "Are you even listening to yourself?"

"What?" Howard looked up, confused as Raj and Leonard shook their heads at him.

The front door opened and Penny walked in, smiling as she did so. Sheldon followed, frowning and clutching his upper left arm.

"Hey, what's going on?" Leonard asked, eyes going back and forth between Penny and Sheldon. "Are you looking for a new job? What's wrong with The Cheesecake Factory?"

"Yes, I'm looking for a new job. Nothing's wrong with The Cheesecake Factory...it just doesn't pay enough," Penny replied simply, falling onto the middle cushion on the couch. She waited for Sheldon to slowly sit down in his spot before handing him the phone. "Here."

Accepting the phone, he placed it back in the cradle.

"So, wait, you're quitting The Cheesecake Factory?" Howard blinked.

"Well, not yet, but hopefully. I have a job interview on Monday," Penny beamed at them. "At the university."

"What?" Leonard's face dropped into an expression of surprise. "You're going to an interview...at the university? Doing what?"

"Administrative assistant in the..um," Penny faltered and blinked. What department was it again?

"Humanities department," Sheldon supplied.

"Yeah, that," Penny grinned.

"Well, great! That sounds wonderful!" Leonard smiled encouragingly. "I'm really happy for you, Penny."

"Thanks Leonard," Penny smiled back at him. "Oh, speaking of which, _I,_" she stressed, turning around to look at Sheldon for a brief moment, "put you down as references, so if Dr. Muller calls you, you guys really have to play me up," she said, reaching for her plate of food once more.

"Will do," Leonard replied as Raj made a thumbs up gesture and nodded enthusiastically.

A silence fell over the group as they all continued with their dinner.

"Hey, can I have your work uniform once you're done with it?" Howard interrupted suddenly, eyebrows waggling.

Everyone in the room turned and glared at Howard.

"What?" He blinked, confused.

…

Later that evening, Penny lay on the boys' couch with her own comforter and pillow. Once Leonard had found out that her power had been cut off, he insisted that she stay over at their place. Penny was surprised by the invitation because she hadn't even given a thought to sleeping anywhere else that night. It was shocking to her that she had come to accept sleeping on their couch as a normal, everyday routine. In fact, it had been so long that she couldn't even remember what it was like to sleep in her own bed. She knew that at some point, she would have to put an end to it. However, at the moment, she couldn't really care. Her life was running fairly smoothly considering she had run out of money and hadn't worked in several days due to her injury. Her forehead was healing up nicely, the purple and blue hue of her skin slowly fading to a bright yellow. She was hoping the bruise would be completely gone by Monday, or at least able to be covered up with makeup.

Monday.

Penny sighed. She still couldn't believe she had a job interview at the university on Monday. Leave it to Sheldon to try and fix the situation by finding her a job at the university. Knowing him, he probably thought of it as a great way to secure a back-up ride to and from work. Smiling slightly, Penny shook her head. Whatever the reason, Penny could now admit that it was a pretty nice thing to do. Even if he had broken into her mail account, Penny added with a slightly frown. She would have to change that password tomorrow. It would have to be something that he would never think of.

_Moonpie._

Penny snorted. Yeah, that was a good one. She'd change it tomorrow.

A shuffling from the hallway caught her attention and she lifted her head off the pillow to watch a tall shadow exit the hallway and move into the kitchen.

"Sheldon?" She whispered. "What are you doing?"

The shadow froze, then turned to face her before reaching over and turning on the light over the sink. "For some reason, I find myself unable to sleep," he replied before reaching into the fridge for a carton of milk.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Penny replied, placing her head down back on her pillow as she watched him pour milk into a mug.

"It's not your fault," he frowned, curious as to why she would apologize for such a thing.

Penny rolled her eyes as he placed the mug into the microwave. Her eyes glanced to his arm as he crossed them over his chest and stared at the microwave.

"I'm sorry about your arm," Penny said suddenly. She wasn't quite sure why she was apologizing. He certainly had deserved it.

_He got you a job interview._

Sheldon turned slightly to glance at her before turning back to the microwave. He didn't answer her, but she could have swore she saw a slight nod of his head before he turned away.

The microwave beeped and he retrieved his mug. Blowing lightly into the mug, he then took a long sip before placing it down on the counter. "Am I right to assume that you will be attending the interview on Monday?" He asked lightly before taking another sip.

"I will," she replied. "It's at 11:30." A thought crossed her mind and she grinned. "Maybe I'll have lunch with you guys after the interview. You eat in the university cafeteria, right?"

The muscles above his cheek started to twitch. "Yes." He answered simply.

"Ohh, hey, maybe you can show me your office while I'm there!" She pointed out excitedly. "I've never really seen where you guys do your work."

The twitching developed faster. "Goodnight, Penny," he said abruptly as he placed his mug in the sink and quickly headed back down the hallway, turning off the kitchen light as he did so.

Penny laughed quietly to herself. She knew he wouldn't be comfortable with her presence in his daily workspace. She just couldn't help but tease him. It was too much fun.

Smiling once more, she turned on her side and closed her eyes. Tomorrow was Saturday, which meant that she had the lunch shift. She was going back to work whether the boys liked it or not.

_00000_

_A/N: Can you say...filler chapter? :D Hope you guys liked it anyway. I'm already working on chapter ten now. It's going to be great...I'm having so much fun with this. Are you guys enjoying it? _


	10. Chapter 10

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Ten_

Sheldon carefully propped his bowl of cereal in one hand and reached down to tap Penny's shoulder with the other.

"Penny? Penny? Penny?" He repeated after every trio of slight taps. He watched as she groaned and lifted her head up slightly off the pillow to glare at him.

"What is your problem?" She croaked at him.

"It's Saturday," he said simply, taking a meaningful look at his bowl, then raising an eyebrow at his spot.

"Oh god," Penny spat, but lifted herself up so she was in a seated position in the middle of the couch. Sheldon nodded, pleased, and moved the pillow to the other side of the couch before sitting down.

Penny waited until he was situated before falling back down, her cheek landing on his rather skinny thigh.

"Penny!" She heard him squeak above her, and a bit of milk landed in her hair. She smiled, feeling a tad sadistic this early in the morning.

"Okay fine," she mock-sighed and lifted her head off his lap. She slowly stood up, taking the blanket with her. "I guess I'll just finish up my sleep in your room." She yawned before walking away.

"_Penny!_" Sheldon yelled, eyes wider than she had ever seen them before. "Nobody's allowed to be in my room, Penny!"

"Nobody's allowed to be in my lap, Penny," she sang in a high voice, and then laughed.

"What's going on?" Leonard came stumbling out of the hallway, gripping the belt on his robe and rubbing his eyes under his glasses.

"I...she..." Sheldon sputtered, waving a hand in her direction. It was quite funny, actually, Penny thought as she smiled again. He really did look like a flamingo on ritalin. Taking in the horrified expression on his face, she almost felt bad for him. Though he completely deserved it, another voice popped up in the back of her head.

Leonard watched Sheldon for a moment, then turned to Penny with a look of disapproval in his eyes. "Penny..."

"I know, I know," she replied and gripped the comforter tighter over her shoulders. "One step too far. Sorry."

"I'm going back to bed now," Leonard sighed and walked back down the hallway, ignoring Sheldon's squawking protests from the couch.

Once Penny could hear Leonard's door shut, she turned back to Sheldon and narrowed her eyes. "You see what you did? You woke up Leonard."

"What _I _did?" Sheldon spat. "Woman, you have earned yourself _two strikes_!"

"Oooo," Penny waved her fingers in the air. "I'm so scared!" She rolled her eyes, then stepped forward to sit in the white chair. As she took a step, she felt her foot catch in the blanket, and her body was propelled forward.

"Penny!" she heard right before she threw a hand out and caught the arm of the chair, righting herself.

She paused for a few moments, catching her breath. "Whew, that was close," she finally muttered. "I really need to stop doing that." She looked up to see Sheldon, one arm outstretched in her direction and one cupping his cereal bowl. He was sitting perfectly still, staring at her with an odd expression across his face. Penny assumed the look was one of his classic 'Are you an idiot?' expressions.

"What?" She shrugged, her face flushed. She wrapped the blanket closer to her body. "I'm tired. I'm not exactly well-coordinated in the morning."

He closed his eyes slightly, licked his lip, and then opened his mouth. "Then sleep with your head on the _other end_," he pointed to the other end of the couch, eyes opening wide once more.

Penny shook her head, but walked back to the couch. "Oh sweetie, you really do have issues with physical contact, don't you?"

"I do not have _problems_ with physical contact," Sheldon spat, his Texan accent bleeding through as he lifted the remote and turned the television on. "I have a problem with you placing your head in my lap and attempting to engage in some sort of...of..._physical intimacy_ when I am supposed to be watching Dr. Who!"

Penny moved a different pillow to the other end of the couch and shook her head. "Whatever." All the fun and excitement she had experienced a moment before was completely gone now. He had ruined it. She knew she shouldn't be surprised, after all, this was Sheldon.

The fact that he brought up the phrase 'physical intimacy' had given Penny quite a start. What _was_ she doing? Simply trying to get a rise out of him? Could she even deny that little twinge of foreign emotion in the back of her mind as she laid her cheek on his thigh?

Was it even _right_ to be feeling this way?

What way _was_ she feeling?

As she situated herself back on the couch, she noticed that she was a bit too long for the space, and reluctantly allowed the soles of her feet to rest against the sides of Sheldon's plaid-covered thigh. Tensing up and waiting for the inevitable reaction, she pulled the blanket over her head to try and avoid it.

As the show came on, she sensed some movement from the other end of the couch. The television went silent, but she could tell it was still on. He had muted it. Several minutes went by before Penny realized that he wasn't going to say anything about her feet touching him. Or perhaps he hadn't noticed, distracted by his favourite show.

Frowning from underneath the blanket, she decided to test that theory. She re-situated herself unnecessarily, her feet wiggling against his thigh. She stilled and waited.

_Clang. Crunch crunch crunch._

Huh, she thought to herself. That was interesting. She thought for sure he would at least start to lecture her about the different bacteria and other microorganisms that bare feet were exposed to and how they were now collecting on his pajama pants. Instead, he was acting as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening and continued to watch his show as if she weren't there.

Frowning, Penny decided to let it go. After all, it wasn't very often that Sheldon allowed anybody to touch him...in any capacity. Feeling an odd sense of comfort curling over her, Penny closed her eyes and slowly drifted back to sleep.

…

When Penny finally awoke hours later, she noticed a certain lack of warmth coming from the area of her feet. Pulling the blanket back from over her head, she opened her eyes, then yawned loudly. Sheldon was typing away at his desk, his back to her. She could barely make out the screen on his laptop, but it appeared to be some sort of graph that he was creating. Penny knew he occasionally worked on the weekends, but it looked a bit odd to see him there. His white board was set up behind him with some incomprehensible equations scrawled all over the board.

"Morning," she finally spoke, then winced as she heard her own voice. Definitely needed some coffee. She cleared her throat and slowly sat up on the couch. "Where's Leonard?" She asked once she realized there was a certain lack of coffee smell permeating the apartment. Leonard usually made coffee early in the morning. Penny often came to steal some.

"He went with Wolowitz and Koothrappali to the farmers' market to 'scam on hippie chicks'," he replied without turning his head.

"Why are they constantly leaving you behind?" Penny frowned as she stood up and stretched, her shirt brushing up past her belly before settling back down again.

"In this instance it is because of my disapproval with street vendors selling wares that have been touched by hundreds of other people," he replied, typing away.

"Huh," Penny replied, then moved into the kitchen. "Need coffee," she groaned as she opened up the cupboard and pulled out her mug. She had left it in the sink yesterday and wasn't quite sure who washed it and placed it in the cupboard, but she wasn't complaining. She started the coffee maker, then made her way over to the front door. "I'll be right back," she yawned again, leaving their apartment and walking back over to hers.

She quickly made her way into her bathroom and went about taking care of her morning routine. Twenty minutes later, she was freshly showered, her teeth were brushed, her hair was brushed, and she had put on her work clothes. As she made her way back to 4A, Penny could smell the scent of fresh coffee and she sighed happily. Opening the door, she watched as Sheldon stood to face his white board, marker in hand. He went about erasing bits of equations and writing over top of them.

Penny poured her cup of coffee, added some milk, and stood there happily as she drank her coffee.

"I see you are planning to return to work today," Sheldon's eyes quickly ran over Penny's attire before moving back to the board.

"I am," Penny lifted her chin. "I have the lunch shift today. I should be back around five," she added. "What are your plans for today?" She asked. "Looks like you'll have the apartment to yourself."

"Indeed," he replied distractedly. "I should be able to accomplish a considerable amount of work as a result," he added.

"I guess we're all just one giant distraction to you," Penny commented, glancing at the clock.

"At times," he acknowledged, still staring at the white board.

"Well, you have fun," Penny said as she placed her now-empty mug in the sink. "I need to leave before I'm late." She slowly made her way to the front door, feeling awkward about leaving...almost as if she was missing something. "Um, bye," she called out to him, checking her apron for her car keys and her wallet.

"Goodbye," Sheldon responded, his back still turned to her.

Shaking her head, Penny forced herself to walk out into the hallway, closing the door behind her. Frowning, she made her way down the stairs, still trying to figure out what it was she felt that she forgot.

…

Sheldon waited for the slight _click_ of the door before turning away from his white board and glancing at his laptop. The graph was still open, and still incomprehensible to him. Sheldon felt his body heave a sigh, and then capped his marker before walking into the kitchen, grabbing Penny's pink mug from the sink and slowly hand-washing it. After rinsing it out, he dried it with a towel and placed it back in the cupboard with the other mugs.

He couldn't quite place it, but it felt as though the notion that had been hovering over his head for the past week was now just beyond his grasp. Surprisingly, it had nothing to do with the work he was currently undergoing at the university. More rather, it seemed to point in the direction of social interactions and basic emotions. Puzzled as to why he would be preoccupied with such matters, he went back to his desk chair and sat for a moment, trying to make sense of the array of notes on his screen.

_Riiing._

Sheldon turned slowly to stare at the phone across the room. Sighing once more, he stood up and made his way over to it. "Hello?" He spoke as he picked up the phone.

"How's my baby?" A female voice thick with a Texan accent came through the line.

"Hello mother," Sheldon felt a slight smile creep up on his lips. "How are you?"

"I'm fine honey, how are you?"

"I am in seemingly good health, my work is progressing nicely, albeit slowly, and I have no complaints regarding my life at this time, mother," Sheldon replied, sitting down in his spot.

"Well that's all nice, Sheldon. How are your friends?"

"My friends are as they've always been," Sheldon shifted the phone closer to his ear. "Leonard is still disrupting my digestive schedule with his ridiculous spontaneous Thursday continuation, Wolowitz is constantly regaling stories of beautiful women he will never have a chance with, and Koothrappali still can't speak in front of the opposite sex."

"Speaking of the opposite sex, how is that girl across the hall there? Penny?"

Sheldon tensed, his body automatically straightening. _Interesting_, he thought to himself, noting his reaction. "Penny has recently suffered a blow to the head, but she is recovering quite nicely," he relayed the short story to his mother.

"Oh the poor dear!" His mother's voice came through the line, and he knew that Penny was soon to be the focus of his mother's next prayer group dedication. "How did she hurt herself?"

"She attempted to close her door too quickly and tripped. Her head hit the corner of her coffee table," Sheldon replied. "She was suffering from a headache and was attempting to quickly-" _Get away from him_ "-go inside and rest." He felt his face settle into a slight frown at that errant thought. Again, that strange feeling bubbled up inside of him, but he couldn't quite place it.

"Oh, the poor dear," his mother repeated again. "Well, I suppose that's one way to teach someone patience," she muttered lightly. "Take heed, Shelly, and watch what you're doing carefully," she warned him.

"I'm always careful mother," he replied to appease his mother.

"Yes, well, in any case," his continued. "You should do something nice for her, Shelly. Bring her some flowers."

Sheldon's face contorted into an unreadable expression. "Mother, I hardly think purchasing one flowers would in any way increase the speed at which they heal."

"That's not the point, Shelly, it's to make them feel better! Don't you remember when you were young and I used to sing 'Soft Kitty' to you?"

Sheldon's face turned a bit warm. "Yes," he mumbled. Oh he remembered quite well. He also remembered a certain blonde female also singing that particular song to him...several times. Once while rubbing Vapo Rub on his chest -counterclockwise. The calming affect it seemed to have on him was pleasing enough.

"It's like that," his mother continued to speak in the background. "She's one of your little friends, right? Well, friends do things to make friends feel better."

"I purchased her dinner on Wednesday," Sheldon blurted out suddenly, a bit shocked at himself for admitting that out loud and to his mother.

A long pause came through the line. "Well isn't that nice," he could practically hear the smile in his mother's voice. From her tone, he could tell it wasn't a nice smile. It was a meddling smile. "But dinner ain't flowers, honey. Buy the girl some flowers."

"Mother, I am not purchasing Penny flowers," Sheldon insisted, now at the end of his patience with this conversation. "If there isn't anything else, I really must return to my research,-"

"Don't you try to kick me off the phone, Sheldon," his mother's tone cut through the line. "Lord knows I'm only able to talk to ya' once in a blue moon."

"There's no such thing as a blue moon," Sheldon muttered softly in protest.

"Now you listen to me, Shelly," his mother cut him off firmly. "I am your mother, and I raised you right. I can tell from the tone of your voice that you feel as though you had something to do with this girl's injury. I don't know what it was and quite honestly, I don't care. You make it up to her, Shelly, or I swear, I will come and visit you for three weeks and straighten you out."

Sheldon felt his throat swallow out of reflex. His jaw ticked, and frustration was building within him. "I will," he finally replied.

"Good. Now tell your mother you love her."

He took a quick look around before dropping his voice a register. "I love you mom. Now _goodbye,_" he added firmly.

"I love you too, honey. Goodbye, Shelly."

Sheldon hung up the phone and huffed to himself, shaking his head slightly. He sat there for a few more minutes before getting back up and walking over to his board. "Oh great!" he exclaimed, grabbing an eraser from his desk and erasing the whole board. "Now I'm going to have to start all over!"

00000

_A/N: I felt bad for leaving you with chapter nine all by itself. It was horribly written and a simple filler chapter. ;D So here's chapter ten. Hope you enjoyed it!_


	11. Chapter 11

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Eleven_

Penny forced her legs to climb stair after stair as she made her way back up to her apartment. Her shift was supposed to end at five, but at three her boss had cut her shift short. They were overstaffed at the restaurant, and there was a decrease in the usual amount of customers for a Saturday. Penny had begged and pleaded with her manager to let her stay, but there was no convincing her.

_Well, there's one more reason why I need a new job._

Penny climbed the last step and made her way over to her door. Once inside, she quickly made her way into the dark bedroom. Stripping off her work clothes, she changed into a casual shirt and sweatpants. After throwing her hair back into a neater ponytail, she placed a headband over top and walked out of her apartment.

Sighing as she reached the door to 4A, she opened it without even knocking. Sheldon and Leonard were seated on the couch and chair, respectively, poring over their laptops.

"Hey," she called out, wearily making her way over to the couch and sitting down next to Sheldon.

"You're home early," Leonard glanced up and frowned in confusion.

"They cut my shift short," Penny explained, leaning back into the couch and turning her head so that she could see Sheldon's screen. She frowned. "What are you guys doing?"

"Paintball strategy," Sheldon replied out of the corner of his mouth, still staring at the screen in front of him.

"Oh," Penny remarked. "Are you guys going tomorrow?"

"Yes," Leonard replied with a sigh. "I kind of thought we'd forgo the meeting considering we skipped on Thursday," he grumbled under his breath.

"Forgo the meeting?" Sheldon looked up over his screen at Leonard as if he were insane. "What would paintball be if not for a meticulous plan of attack and perfected execution?"

"Fun?" Leonard offered curtly, the corners of his mouth turning down in annoyance.

"I find nothing 'fun' about engaging in a paintball battle with no possible plan for victory," Sheldon countered, looking back down at his screen.

A long pause settled over the group. "Okay then," Penny broke the silence and stood up from the couch. "That sounds fantastic, but I'm hungry. What's the plan for tonight?" She asked, not entirely sure what Sheldon's schedule for Saturday night was. Usually she went out on the weekends, and therefore never really joined them on a Saturday night. "Other than laundry," she quickly added, pointing a finger in Sheldon's direction.

Sheldon let out a breath, and she knew he was just about to berate her for not remembering that Saturday night was laundry night. She laughed easily. "Like I could forget," she commented before he could even say anything. How could she possibly forget ruining his laundry night, only to find her undergarments hanging high above the street an hour later, courtesy of one Sheldon Lee Cooper.

"It's a quarter to four," Sheldon remarked instead.

"Yeah, and?" Penny asked, knowing that a very typical Sheldon explanation was about to head her way.

"And," Sheldon stressed, "We do not eat this early."

"We?" Penny pulled a face. "You speaking on behalf of your ego now as well?"

Sheldon raised his face toward Penny, annoyance clearly set behind his typical dead-pan expression. She tried to stare him down, but Sheldon was clearly a pro. After ten seconds had passed, Penny made a funny face.

Sheldon was clearly not impressed.

Penny sighed. "Oh, fine," She grumbled and fell back into her spot on the couch, bouncing as she did so. "I'll just wait." She continued, noticing that she had landed sideways towards Sheldon, but hadn't bothered to straighten herself up.

Sheldon cleared his throat, glanced down to her shoulder, which was pressed heavily against his arm, and then went back to his computer screen.

Encouraged by the fact that he hadn't insisted that she move, Penny decided to give in to her impulses and rested her head against his shoulder. After thinking about what had happened this morning all throughout her work shift, Penny still couldn't rationalize why she was acting the way she was around Sheldon. Antagonizing Sheldon was second nature to her, but...antagonizing him in a way that could be perceived as flirting?

It wasn't flirting, she knew, but it sure seemed oddly reminiscent to the way she acted around men she was attracted to. The touching, the teasing, the constant focusing of attention...it was all so confusing to her. One part of her mind kept reminding her that it could possibly be that she was attracted to Sheldon. The other, more rational part of her mind justified it as pent-up frustration from not dating in quite a while. When she thought about it, it really made sense. She couldn't focus her attention on Leonard, as they had parted ways quite a while ago. Raj couldn't speak to other women, and Howard...well, if she gave Howard _any _indication she was even slightly interested in a relationship, he'd probably whip out a bottle of alcohol and a large box of condoms.

Sheldon was really the safe choice. There wasn't any possibility of a future with him. Hell, she couldn't even quite figure out what his 'deal' was. It only made sense that she was leaning toward him unconsciously.

_And figuratively._

She felt the warmth of his shoulder on her cheek and she closed her eyes slightly. She hadn't had any physical contact with another person since she had gone on a trio of unfortunate dates several months ago. That had to be the reason why she felt so at peace leaning there on the couch.

Opening her eyes, she glanced over Sheldon's computer screen and froze slightly. Leonard was staring at her with one eyebrow furrowed. Matching his stare, she could only guess as to what was going on inside his head.

"Penny, could I speak to you for a moment?" Leonard finally leaned back and moved his laptop to the coffee table.

"Now?" She asked, slightly disappointed that she was losing the warmth in her side.

"Yes, now," he added, a bit forcefully.

Penny frowned. "Okay," she said slowly, standing up and moving to follow him down the hallway. He opened the door to his room, a bit too hard, and stepped back to allow her to pass before him. She glared at him as she walked into the room. What was his problem?

"Okay," He started once the door was shut behind him. "What...How...What?" He asked, his hands outstretched as if waiting for an explanation to fall into them. Confusion masked his face, and he could only stare at her from behind his glasses, at a loss for words.

"What?" She asked, taking a seat at the edge of his bed.

"What was that?" He threw an arm out toward the bedroom door.

"What was what?" She frowned. _What was he so upset about?_

"You...he...Sheldon!" Leonard finally cried. "Leaning...on the...shoulder...and he...didn't even say anything!" He finally exploded with words.

Penny sighed and took in the baffled and slightly hurt expression on his face. "I don't know, Leonard," she shook her head.

"What do you mean you don't know?" He cried. "You have to know! I mean...you were there!"

"What do you want from me? I really don't know," She threw her hands out. "I leaned. He didn't protest. I stayed where I was. I'm damn lazy, you know that." She scoffed, all at once feeling very uncomfortable with the conversation.

Leonard took in a deep sigh, then closed his eyes. He rubbed his forehead and there was a long pause for several minutes as he collected his thoughts. "Is there...no...no, there can't be," he shook his head and rubbed his eyes under his glasses.

"Can't be what?" Penny asked, crossing her arms over her chest. _What was his problem?_

"There's nothing going on between you and Sheldon," he stated simply.

"Okay, there isn't," she shrugged, raising an eyebrow. "Are you done interrogating my every action with other men?" Frustration quickly built up in her chest. "Because quite honestly, I feel like we're back in a relationship," she bit out, knowing that it would cause an issue between them. At this point, she really didn't care.

Leonard was a sweetheart. He was incredibly nice, thoughtful, and adorably perfect at times. However, he had an annoying habit of analyzing her every move and acting as if he seemed to own a part of her that he had 'invested' in. She couldn't take that kind of thinking back then, and she certainly wasn't going to put up with it now.

"Penny," he trailed off, arms falling to his sides. He sighed, and she could see the hurt in his eyes.

"Leonard," she shook her head. "I love you to death, but you have to let this go. You have to let _me_ go," she insisted, pleading with her eyes. "We tried, we really did, and it was great. It just wasn't...everything," she tried to explain. "Something was missing..."

"For you," he cut her off slightly.

"Yes, for me, Leonard," she insisted. "You can't have a successful relationship if only one person is fulfilled by it." She shook her head. "Now, tell me honestly...did you really drag me in here because I happened to sit a little too close to _Sheldon_?"

Leonard pursed his lips and turned his head to the floor. "No," he quietly admitted.

"You would have been upset if I had been sitting too close to _anybody_," Penny continued. "I mean, come on," she laughed. "Do you really think that something is happening between me and Sheldon?"

Leonard felt a reluctant half-smile creep up on his face. "Yeah, I guess I overreacted," he nodded slowly. "I mean, it is _Sheldon_."

"Exactly," Penny stood up and hugged Leonard lightly. "Now please...can we just move past all of this? I thought we already were."

"No, you're right," he replied without looking at her, and she could tell that it wasn't over. She had a feeling it was going to take him a bit longer to get over the fact that she wasn't his any longer. "I'm sorry," he gave her a sheepish look.

"We're okay," she told him, smiling. Then she narrowed her eyes and jabbed a finger into his shoulder. "Now get over it so we can continue being friends."

"Will do," he gave her an unconvincing smile and opened his bedroom door. "I'm...I'm just going to head over to Raj's place," he said as she walked past him. She couldn't quite blame him for wanting to get away from her after that conversation. Honestly, she was feeling the need for space as well. "Make an excuse for me," he added, nodding his head in the direction of the living room as he strode quickly down the hallway and toward the front door.

"Oh, Leonard, you're back. Listen, I made a few changes,-wait, where are you going?" Sheldon's eyes widened as the door shut in the middle of his sentence. "Where is he going?" Sheldon turned toward Penny and she felt herself smile at his lost and alarmed expression.

"He's going to get Raj and Howard," she lied easily. "He doesn't want to explain the plan twice."

"Oh, good," Sheldon replied, moving his laptop to the coffee table. "He's finally come to his senses." He stood up slowly and walked into the kitchen.

Penny shook her head and smiled to herself. "I hope so," she mumbled to herself before following him into the kitchen. It was high time Leonard returned to being the friend...and not the ex-boyfriend. "So! What's the meal plan?"

"Penny," he said in a voice that sounded too much like a warning for her taste. "It's only four in the evening," he reminded her as he grabbed a glass from the cupboard.

"So?" She scoffed. "By the time dinner is ready, it'll be close to five," she pointed out. "Come on, I'm just trying to figure out what we'll be eating later." She pleaded with him. "If it's something good, I'll wait. If not, I'll raid your fridge and make my own dinner."

Sheldon frowned as he grabbed a drink from the fridge and poured it into his glass. "I have no immediate plans," he said finally, putting the container back in the fridge and carrying his glass to the couch.

"Like you expect me to believe that?" Penny scoffed. "Come on," she repeated as she walked over and stood in front of him as he sat down. "What's the plan for dinner?"

"Penny," he warned her again, putting down his drink on his coaster.

"Sheldon," she repeated, leaning her face down and placing her hands on her hips.

"If this is some sort of intimidation on your part, I can assure you that it is proving ineffective," he drawled easily, not one to back down from his position.

"Oh really?" She suddenly leaned in closer, bumping noses with him and smiling as he immediately jerked his head back slightly, eyes wide. "You sure about that?"

His face muscles and lips began twitching, but he managed to stare right back at her, a firm expression in his eyes. "Quite sure," he finally said, albeit a bit unconvincingly.

"Huh," she finally took pity on him and leaned back, watching as the twitching died down and an arrogant expression took its place. His eyebrow raised slightly and he reached over for his glass, taking a sip before placing it back down.

She shrugged and flopped down next to him once more. Not really caring to debate the reason why, she simply leaned over and mashed her cheek against his shoulder once more. "You can take the fun out of anything, you know that?" She turned her head slightly and watched as he dug his hands into the khaki material above his knees, grasping it tight.

"I was not aware that acts of intimidation were 'fun'," he replied, his voice a bit strained.

She waited for the inevitable comment about her placement on his shoulder, and how she was touching him when he preferred to not engage in any physical contact with others. After a few minutes, she realized it wasn't coming. Smiling, and not quite understanding the reason why, she closed her eyes and ignored the grumblings of her stomach.

00000

_A/N: Sorry it took so long for an update, guys. I had a horrible case of writer's block with this chapter. Couldn't shake it and had to force my way through it. Oh well._

_Hint for next chapter: Paintball. ;D_

Reviews are tiny little writer hugs. :3


	12. Chapter 12

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twelve_

"Why am I here again?" Penny asked the other passengers in the car.

"You aided in this week's downfall, and now you can watch as it plays out," Sheldon replied curtly from the front seat.

"And how, exactly, did I do that?" Penny asked, at a loss.

"You aided Leonard in escaping our paintball strategy meeting, and then you lied about the impending arrival of Wolowitz and Koothrappali," Sheldon replied succinctly.

"Gee, thanks Leonard," Penny grumbled, suddenly remembering the events of the day before.

"Well, when you think about it, now that you're here we might actually have a chance of winning this week," Leonard replied. She could practically hear the smile in his voice.

"Oh joy," Penny muttered.

"And might I add that you look particularly ravishing in Leonard's spare paintball jumpsuit?" Wolowitz leaned in close to her ear as his eyes ran up and down her body.

Penny slowly turned her head and glared at the man seated to her right. "Howard, I had a garlic bagel with cream cheese twenty minutes ago. Unless you want it all over _your_ jumpsuit, I suggest you lay off this morning." There was a sharp jab in her left side and she whirled around in time to see Raj snicker silently and give Penny a thumbs up. She smiled back, halfheartedly.

"Is that what I smell?" Sheldon's head turned around. "That's actually a sound breakfast choice for paintball battle, Penny. Did you know that ancient Egyptian slaves were given a daily ration of garlic? It was thought to ward off illness and increase endurance and strength. Complete hokum, of course, as garlic neither increases strength or endurance, but one could make the argument for plausibility on the basis of other health benefits."

"You know, Sheldon, that's actually very interesting," she replied, nodding her head as she did so.

"I always thought so." Penny caught a goofy little grin on his face before he turned back around.

"What else can you tell me about garlic?" She asked innocently, avoiding the curious glance from Leonard in the rear view mirror.

"Well, in Palestinian tradition..."

…

"Oh god, if I ever hear the word 'garlic' ever again, I think I'll bash my own brains in with the nearest blunt object," Howard groaned as he exited the car.

"You did that on purpose," Leonard glared at Penny as she slid out of the back seat.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Penny's eyes widened and she smiled sweetly. "I have a genuine interest in all things garlic," a sardonic grin crept across her face, and she began walking toward the entrance.

"She is truly evil, dude," Raj stepped up next to Leonard as they both watched Penny walk away with Howard and Sheldon. He shook his head. "But you have to give her credit, that was pretty genius."

"It's damn scary is what it is," Leonard corrected him. He sighed and pulled on his eye gear, resting it on his forehead. "Come on, let's just go."

…

Penny had been through this whole paintball process once before, but it had been some time ago and she hadn't actually gotten a chance to play. She snorted as she remembered Sheldon shooting her because of his ruined cushion. A sudden thought occurred to her and she smiled once more. He hadn't mentioned his displeasure with his cushion since the incident. She hadn't really thought about it, but the fact that he had let the matter rest after his 'revenge' really seemed to indicate a big change in Sheldon. She imagined that if anything like that had happened years ago, she would no longer be allowed in their apartment.

_Sheldon's changed a lot._ Penny nodded at that thought, glancing over to the man in question as they continued walking to their meeting 'shed'. She thought about yesterday, and how he allowed her to lean on his shoulder even though he was obviously uncomfortable with her there. She remembered how he dug his hands into his pants, but remained as he was.

Maybe he was just trying to be a better friend?

They all entered the shed, and Penny yawned as the boys immediately set out a plan of attack. She heard her name mentioned several different times, but didn't really bother to listen. She had her own plan of attack. She'd just run out and shoot anything that moved. She did move closer to Sheldon though, in an attempt to look as if she was paying some attention to the plan.

"Hey guys," a female voice came from behind Penny and she quickly turned around. "Girls," Leslie continued, nodding to both Penny and Sheldon.

Penny snorted. Sheldon fumed.

"Oh hey Leslie," Leonard called out.

"So we have one extra player today?" Leslie asked, tapping her paintball gun against her leg. "You any good?" She asked Penny directly.

"I guess we'll find out," Penny shrugged, slightly put off by Leslie's directness.

"Okay, well, I'd better get back to my squad, but I just wanted to let you guys know that we have a little 'bet' going with the chemistry department this week," Leslie made the hand gesture for quotation marks. "Loser forfeits the rights to Denny's later."

"Why can't we just all go?" Leonard asked, his face screwed up in confusion.

"Well, there was a little 'interdepartmental dispute' the last time we were all there, which may or may not have led to property damage and a police escort off the premises," Leslie explained, nodding and throwing her hands out slightly.

"What? Seriously?" Penny asked, incredulous.

"Hey, you don't mess with chemists," Howard cut in.

"Yeah," Leslie sighed. "But hey, what are you gonna do?" She shrugged.

"Well, okay...I guess if we lose, we can just head out to IHOP," Leonard shrugged.

"IHOP?" Sheldon repeated, his eyes widening.

"Oh, here we go," Howard sighed.

"We do not eat at IHOP, Leonard, we eat at Denny's," Sheldon began, but Penny cut him off by reaching over and patting his chest.

"Relax Whack-a-doodle," Penny rolled her eyes. "We're not going to lose."

"I like your attitude," Leslie nodded in approval."And cute pet name, by the way," she pointed at Sheldon and then walked out of the shed.

"Oh yeah, well..." Sheldon sputtered, eyes narrowing at the space where Leslie had just been standing.

"Take it easy, Sheldon. Leave the wit to the pros," Penny pat his arm once more and turned to Leonard. "Okay, what's the plan?" She was suddenly determined to win this, if for nothing else than to not have to listen to Sheldon gripe all through brunch about eating at IHOP.

"Okay, listen up gang..."

…

Penny suppressed a squealed as she took down another player. Pumping her fist in the air, she turned around and watched as Sheldon shot another player in the distance. This game was actually quite fun, and Penny was enjoying every minute of it. They had all broken off into groups, Raj, Sheldon, and Penny on one...Leonard and Howard on the other. They had secured a perfect position behind trees and slightly above a clearing. At first, she thought that nobody would be stupid enough to walk through an open clearing, but she was pleasantly surprised at how easily their opponents were led by the absolute quiet and stillness of the area.

Raj gave them both a thumbs up from ten feet away, then gave the signal that nobody was coming their way. Penny relaxed slightly, leaning heavily against the tree behind her.

"This is fun," she whispered quietly.

Sheldon turned to frown at her, then pressed a finger to his lips for silence.

"There's nobody here," she protested, still whispering.

He vehemently shook his head and frowned, once again pressing a finger to his lips.

She sighed and rolled her head back. Man, he really took these things to the extreme. She then tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention again. Once he turned around, she gave him a big, exaggerated grin and a thumbs up.

She knew he had tried to suppress it, but the corner of his mouth turned up just slightly before it was forced away and he nodded, turning back around.

_Sheldon almost smiled._

Penny grinned. He was having fun, too.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Raj frantically signaling that people were coming. Shifting forward slightly so that she and Sheldon were both crouching next to each other, she aimed her gun and scanned the clearing. She saw Sheldon jerk, then point quite forcefully in a particular direction. She followed his finger and saw three men walking cautiously out of a group of trees and into the clearing. They were all wearing bright orange bands on their arms.

Sheldon turned to Penny. _Chemists, _they both mouthed at the same time. Penny nodded, then aimed her gun at the first target, waiting until the group was too far beyond the safety of the trees. Once they had passed that imaginary line, Penny, Raj, and Sheldon all shot at the same time.

Unfortunately, they all shot the same person.

Jumping, the other two quickly started running for safety...towards them.

_Shit!_ Penny mentally screamed, and took aim once more. If they could catch them quickly, perhaps they wouldn't notice where the shots were coming from. She shot, and heard Raj try again a second later. They both hit their targets, but both men had already noticed where the shots were coming from. They shouted, then collapsed to the ground, 'dead'. She knew in a few moments they would eventually get up and leave the game, but those cries and their location would soon give away their position to other teams.

Sheldon grabbed at her arm briefly, tugging her up. She stood, and Raj ran over, holding his arms up as if to say 'now what?'.

Crashing noises came from behind them, and Penny turned to see seven more chemists running toward the area of their fallen comrades.

"Run," Sheldon whispered, and they all took off in the opposite direction. Raj tripped over a branch, but quickly recovered and continued running, hell nipping at his heels.

"They're over here!" A voice shouted from behind them, and a paintball went whizzing through the air, hitting a branch five feet ahead of them.

"Shit!" Penny yelled without thinking. Her heart was racing. She did not want to get hit by one of those suckers. She knew they stung. Not to mention the fact that their team would be down a player, and that meant one step further from Denny's and one closer to IHOP.

That thought seemed to give Penny an added energy boost and her legs pumped hard, jumping over bits of foliage and managing to keep up with Sheldon's long legs.

"Ahhh!" Raj's voice came from behind them.

"Raj!" Penny turned around, but a hand grasped her arm and propelled her forward.

"Leave him!" Sheldon shouted, oddly cavalier about the fact that they had just lost their friend to the game. Another paintball went flying past her face, and Penny could have swore she felt a light kiss of paint splatter on her face as it exploded on a nearby tree.

They spotted their shed ahead, but instead of entering it, they ran around it and stopped on the other side.

"I'll take this side, you take that side," Sheldon instructed, a little out of breath. Penny's eyebrow raised as she took a moment to process that sound once again. Shivering lightly, she shook her head and turned to cover the right, her gun raised. She waited for her opponent to come bursting around from the side. When he did, she would be ready.

"_I'll take this side, you take that side." _

Penny angrily forced her mind away from the sound of Sheldon's breathless voice. Damn. She needed to get laid.

They stood there for several minutes, waiting. Penny couldn't hear anything. She wasn't quite sure if they had actually lost them, or if it was a fake-out.

"Penny!" Sheldon shouted, alarmed. Penny turned her head in time to see a player with an orange band in the distance, gun pointed directly at Penny. She gasped, and closed her eyes, shrinking down and waiting for the sting of the paintball. She heard the crack of the gun, then the splatter of the paintball, but there was no sting. Curiously, she opened her eyes slowly and saw nothing but green camo as it filled her vision.

Eyebrows furrowed, Penny craned her head up and met Sheldon's surprised face as he stood between Penny and her attacker. Time seemed to still as Penny looked down and saw a bright blue paint drop drip from behind Sheldon and hit the grass.

She turned her face back up to his, realization dawning on her face.

"I..." Sheldon licked his lips. "I don't know why I did that." He said slowly, his voice filled with confusion and bewilderment. His eyes dropped from her eyes, then immediately jumped back up again. There seemed to be some sort of communication between them that Penny didn't quite fully catch, but the moment he suddenly dropped to his knees, 'dead', Penny whipped up her gun and immediately shot the attacker across the field. It landed dead between his eyes, bright orange paint splattering across his face mask, and his body jerked backwards, then landed on the ground, blinded by paint.

Nodding in satisfaction, Penny looked down to where Sheldon was kneeling in front of her. She frowned, confused. So many thoughts were running through her mind, but she couldn't quite seem to take a moment and delve into any one of them. Shaking her head, she sighed and watched as he sat back on his heels.

"Well standing here isn't going to accomplish anything," Sheldon finally broke the silence. "Get inside the shed and wait for Leonard or Howard to come back. Tell them Raj and I are already out." His voice, so emotionless, so...rational.

She couldn't seem to contain the swirl of emotions running through her. "We're going to end this," she promised him. "Go back to the car and call ahead to Denny's. Get them to set up a table for all of us. That restaurant is ours," she jabbed a finger in the air for emphasis. Now she was completely determined. She was going to win this thing even if she had to take down every stupid little orange-banded chemist geek all on her own. They might have taken Sheldon, but they were _not _going to take away his Paintball Sunday Grand Slam.

"Good," Sheldon nodded. "I trust that you'll assume my leadership role now that I am no longer a part of the game."

"You got it," Penny nodded firmly, gripping her gun tighter. "Now get going," she told him. "We don't need a disqualification when we're so close to taking them down."

Sheldon nodded, then stood quickly. "Good luck," he said, then turned to walk away.

Penny couldn't quite rationalize why she immediately felt the need to follow him, but she pushed it down and ran around the shed, running through the door. A paintball flew past her face and she turned to see Leonard and Howard standing at the other end, their guns pointed in her direction.

"It's me!" she shouted angrily.

"Oh," Howard replied. "Oops."

Sighing in frustration, Penny ran to their end of the shed and pointed her gun at the door as well. "Raj and Sheldon are out."

"Great," Leonard replied, then allowed his head to bang against the wall behind him. "Our squad is down to three. Leslie's got two others left. The chemistry department still has eight team members. We're outnumbered."

"Like hell we are," Penny shouted angrily. "We're taking those little nerds down, Leonard. Now quit banging your head against that wall and help me come up with a plan!"

Both men turned and stared at her.

"Are you insane?"

"Wow. That's hot."

Penny smacked them both with the end of her gun. "I'm serious! Let's do this! What's the plan?"

"Um, well, the astronomy department is now out. I suppose we could hang out by the bathrooms and wait for nature to do its job," Howard shrugged.

"That's all you have? Ambushing people when they have to pee?" Penny exclaimed, shaking her head.

"Well there's really nothing that we could plan this late in the game and with so few players," Leonard shrugged.

"Wait, shhhh!" Penny threw a finger over her mouth. "I think I heard something," she whispered, then crept slowly over to the door. Peering out slowly, she spotted seven players with orange bands moving slowly toward the shed, guns raised and aimed.

_Shit!_ She exclaimed mentally. _Shit shit shit!_

She turned back around, and signaled the number seven to Howard and Leonard. They both sighed, then signaled that they should surrender.

Penny threw her arm out at them, wishing they were closer so that it would have hit them. She then closed her eyes and allowed her face to fall into the palm of her hand. _Think think think!_

Run out and shoot? No.

Wait until they came inside to shoot? No.

Send Howard out in nothing but his underwear to momentarily blind them and _then _shoot?

...No. Gross. Where had that come from?

Penny suddenly gasped and her head shot straight up. No, not Howard...

She frantically signaled for Leonard and Howard to come over. When they complied, she whispered the plan to them. Leonard's eyes widened, and Howard's face lit up brighter than she even thought possible.

"Ready?" She asked. They nodded frantically, gripping their guns.

Penny sighed, counted to ten, and then threw her gun to the ground. She quickly turned around and exited the shed, her arms up, surrendering. The seven players in front of her paused, not sure if they should shoot.

Instead of waiting for them to make up their minds and shoot her, Penny quickly reached for the zipper at her neck and yanked it down, revealing the absence of a shirt and the unmistakable presence of a brightly-coloured pink lace bra.

Five of the seven immediately dropped their guns and stumbled to pick them up. The moment their guns hit the ground, Howard and Leonard came roaring out of the shed, shots flying. Shouts filled the air as Penny zipped up her suit. Out of the trees to the right, she saw the last chemist come racing out toward the group. Immediately after, Leslie and two other physicists came flying out, guns raised as they shot and hit him square in the back.

Penny took a look around and saw that every single orange-band player was covered in orange paint.

"Yes!" She screamed, jumping and pumping her fist up into the air in victory. The other team members followed suit, and embarrassing taunts were quickly thrown out to the fallen chemists. Penny grinned, and then made her way back to the shed to collect her borrowed gun.

Sure, it was a cheap shot...but hell, they won. She wasn't above a little cheating to get the job done. More importantly, however, they had taken down Raj and Sheldon. Protective instincts over her boys had taken precedence over self-respect and modesty.

Oh yes. Paintball was fun.

…

A little while later, the group made their way to the parking lot, exchanging humorous stories with one another about events from the game. Penny couldn't bother to contribute, as her eyes were currently focusing on the figure standing next to Leonard's car. His arms were crossed, and he turned slightly to Raj, his lips moving. She was too far away to hear, but she knew that he was making some sort of remark about the group's energy.

Excited, she jogged ahead and stopped short when she was about two feet away from the car. "We won," she stated, grinning.

"Good," Sheldon replied simply. "Next time, accomplish that task at a faster rate. It is now 11:30, and our table has been ready for ten minutes."

Shaking her head, Penny stepped forward and threw her arm around Sheldon, embracing him in a half-hug. Ignoring the squeak from Raj and the gasp from Sheldon, she rested her cheek against his chest for a moment. "Alright Dr. Whack-a-doodle, let's go get some food," she said, patting his now-dry back before stepping away and opening the car door.

Sheldon took a moment to recover, but when he did, he simply acted as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. "Indeed," he replied, and opened his door, sliding into the passenger seat.

Raj stood outside the car, squeaking and pointing a finger between Sheldon and Penny. Back and forth, back and forth.

"Hey man, what's up?" Howard came up behind Raj, slapping him on the back.

Raj, at a loss for words, simply looked at Howard with a mixture of facial expressions.

"Geez, calm down, it's just a game," Howard snorted and placed his hands on his hips, puffing his chest out lightly. "It's perfectly okay that you choked and I completely won the game for the team."

Raj's expression suddenly dropped and he glared at Howard. "Dude, you look like a cracked-out rooster," he shot back.

"Yeah well, this cock is ready for a giant plate of bacon and eggs, if you catch my meaning," he leaned in and waggled his eyebrow.

"I don't think even _you_ know what you're talking about," Raj shook his head.

Howard froze, then blinked several times. "Yeah, you're probably right. Let's just go."

00000

_A/N: Whew, long chapter! :D Okay, bad news: I'm moving out of the country tomorrow, and I probably won't be able to update again until I set up internet in my new apartment. :( So the next chapter might take a couple of days. _

_I hope you enjoyed this chapter! :D_

_Hint for next chapter: Bamboo._


	13. Chapter 13

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Thirteen_

Penny stood nervously outside the door to the humanities department office. There was a little hanging clock on the handle that stated it would be closed until 12:30, most likely due to her interview. She picked at her skirt, tugging it down low on her hips. Even though it was only an inch above her knee, she still felt as if it were too short. Normally, she wouldn't have given it a thought, but she really needed this job. The last thing she wanted was to come off as unprofessional.

Taking in a deep breath, she nodded to herself, clutched the resume that Sheldon had left for her on their coffee table that morning, and knocked on the door. A loud crashing noise came from behind the door and Penny took a step back. Looking up and down the hallway, she leaned forward, concerned.

"Hello?" She pressed her ear to the door, but heard no response. Curious now, she slowly reached for the handle and opened the door. Peering inside, her eyes widened at the mess she found inside.

"Wow," she shook her head as she opened the door a little more and half-stepped inside. "And Sheldon thought my apartment was a disaster?"

Books and papers were strewn across any flat surface in the small office: on top of chairs, the large desk, in between books on the bookshelf, on top of filing cabinets...they were everywhere, and clearly not organized in any fashion.

"Yes? Hello?" A female voice came from behind the half-opened door to the right.

"Oh, yes, hello?" Penny called out cautiously. "Sorry for intruding. I'm Penny," she offered. "I'm here for an interview with Dr. Muller?"

"Oh yes!" A head popped out from behind the door, dwarfed by giant glasses and framed with frizzy hair that was somewhat bound by a rubber band on top of her head. "Hello Penny!" Dr. Muller stepped out from behind the door, and Penny could see that the state of her clothing reflected the office. She was wearing a brown skirt with a bright green dress shirt, layered with a plaid blazer. Penny tried, but ultimately failed, to not stare at this mess of a woman in front of her. She had to be about sixty years old, and Penny suddenly had the image of someone that had broken out of the nursing home and was confused as to where they were.

_This was a professor?_

"I'm Dr. Muller," the woman smiled and extended a hand out. Penny reached for it and shook it lightly. "Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you," Penny replied, nodding and smiling cautiously.

"Sorry about the state of the office," Dr. Muller continued, pushing her glasses back up on her nose. "Since my assistant has taken a leave of absence, I'm afraid I might have let things go..." she trailed off, looking around.

"Oh, no, it's fine," Penny laughed nervously. "Really, don't worry about it."

"Great," Dr. Muller smiled. "Well, I can see we'll get along famously."

"We will?" Penny asked, confused.

"Oh yes, this was your first test," she continued, nodding and resting her hands on her hips. "My last assistant was a bit of a neat freak. I'm just not that way," she said as if it were a terrible thing. "If you have no problem with this, then I think we'll do just fine," she smiled.

"Great," Penny smiled. As nervous as she was about this job, and the state of this office, she really, really needed this job.

"Well, I only have two questions for you Penny," Dr. Muller continued.

"Okay," Penny nodded.

"One. Why do you want this job? And answer me honestly. None of that 'Oh, being a secretary is my life' bullshit. I want the real deal."

Penny blinked several times. Nope, this woman certainly hadn't broken out of the old folks' home. She was definitely alive and kicking.

"Oh, um," Penny faltered for a moment. "Well," she stalled, trying to come up with an impressive answer.

"You've got three seconds," Dr. Muller replied.

"I need the money," Penny blurted out, then closed her eyes. Damn. That was so not going to get her this job.

"Good," Dr. Muller replied. "Next question..."

"Wait!" Penny interrupted her, flabbergasted. "You're okay with that answer?"

"Oh sure," the professor shrugged. "Everybody needs money. Heck, that's why we work, isn't it? I just wanted to make sure you weren't trying to take advantage of the tuition benefit. I hired somebody a few years back...terrible mistake. They were only working for me to take advantage of the discounted tuition. Did a terrible job here. No heart into the job," she shook her head. "So, next question..."

Penny's mind went reeling. _Discounted tuition? _They offered that?

"When can you start?" Dr. Muller's voice cut through Penny's thoughts.

"Um," Penny blinked. "Tomorrow?" She replied, unsure of where this was going.

"Penny?"

"Yes?"

"I'd like to hire you."

"Really?" Penny's eyes widened. Surely it couldn't have been this easy?

"Oh yes it is," Dr. Muller replied, and Penny realized that she had said that last part out loud. "I make it that simple. At my age, I can't handle the crap anymore. I do what I want, and it's been working nicely for me."

"Oh, well, that works," Penny laughed nervously. Again. "So, I really...have the job?" She asked.

"Yep. I just need you to fill out some forms...we'll take the information we need today and I'll send them on over to human resources. You probably won't be able to start this week, but I know a few people. I'll pull some strings and see if I can get you in here as soon as possible. I need some help around here," she looked down to a pile of books on the floor. "It's starting to get to the point where even I can't stand this mess anymore."

Penny laughed, a real laugh. "Thank you so much Dr. Muller," she smiled. "I promise you, I'll do my best here."

"I'm sure you will, darling," Dr. Muller nodded. "I spoke to your references this morning. Three of them gave you excellent recommendations. Normally, I don't allow personal references because they only talk about the good qualities you have, but that fourth reference really sealed the deal."

"Fourth reference?" Penny asked, fiddling with her resume.

"Yes, Dr. Cooper. He began with a long list of faults and shortcomings."

"He did?" Penny's voice fell flat and her eyes narrowed slightly.

"Yes, but then he went on to point out your good qualities, and I have to say, it was the most realistic depiction if I've ever heard one. In fact, I feel as if I've known you now for quite some time," Dr. Muller smiled. "I'm real happy you listed him as a reference. It was what really sealed the deal for me in offering you this position."

Penny felt her face slide into an easy smile. "Yeah, well...that's Sheldon Cooper," she looked down to her shoes, which were crossed along with her legs. "He's brutally honest."

"That he is," Dr. Muller chucked. "Well, I suppose you should fill out these forms while I head out to the cafeteria now," she continued. "It's my lunch hour, you see."

"Oh yes, of course. I'm so sorry," Penny moved out of the way and accepted the forms that Dr. Muller had extended. "I'll get right on it. Thank you so much," she added again.

Dr. Muller smiled, nodded, and left the room.

Penny let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding.

She had a job. A full-time, paying job. Pay that would catch her up on her bills. Pay that would prevent her from losing her apartment.

In the safety of the closed office, Penny broke down and finally cried.

…

"I'm telling you, that girl at the register was totally checking me out," Howard insisted as he reached into the bag and pulled out his meal.

"Dude, she had a lazy eye," Raj rolled his eyes. "More often than not, she was also checking out the little toy vending machine next to you."

"Say what you want, but that eye occasionally wandered a little south of the border, if you catch my meaning," Howard's eyebrow raised.

"Maybe she was wondering how you fit yourself into those tiny pants," Raj pointed out.

"Hey, yeah, I was kind of wondering about that. Doesn't it...squish things a little?" Leonard spoke up, a mouthful of take-out food.

Sheldon's face contorted into an expression of disgust.

"Hell no, it _showcases_ them," Howard spread his arms, and legs, to make his point.

"Oh, dude, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little," Raj replied, putting down his take-out container and reaching for his bottle of water.

The door opened suddenly and Penny came rushing through, purse in one hand and a large plastic bag in the other. "Hey guys," she called out, a little out of breath. "What's going on?"

"Siam palace," Sheldon replied, motioning to the bag on the table.

"As usual," Penny nodded, putting down her bags and moving into the kitchen. "I think I'm going to have a cup of ramen noodles tonight," she said, reaching into a cupboard and pulling out one of the ten cups she had purchased for a dollar at the supermarket.

"Oh, you don't want some?" Leonard turned to face her, confused.

"You guys ordered for me?" She froze, panicked. Had they not remembered that she was totally broke?

"Oh, well, we figured we would treat you since you got that job in the humanities department," Leonard finally gave in and gave her a goofy grin.

"Hey," Penny protested loudly. "I wanted to break the news!"

"Sorry," he replied, clearly not. "She told Sheldon over the phone that she was going to hire you."

"She told Sheldon?" Penny frowned, confused.

"Yes, after I gave her my recommendation," Sheldon clarified and took another bite of his mee krob.

"Huh," Penny replied and stood there for a few moments. "Oh, that reminds me," she ran over to the plastic bag she had left in the living room. "Sheldon, could I talk to you for a moment in the hallway?" She asked, clutching the plastic bag close to her chest.

"To what end?" Sheldon asked, clearly not interested in moving from his spot.

"Please?" She pleaded. "It's important."

Leonard, Howard, and Raj stopped eating and slowly looked from Penny, to Sheldon, and back again. Raj had a suspicious look on his face. Leonard was slightly at a loss. Howard was looking around as if the world was about to end.

"Wait? You actually want to be alone with Sheldon?" He asked, his face clearly confused. "What the heck for?"

"Sheldon," Penny bit out sharply, ignoring Howard. "Hallway. Now."

Sheldon sighed, then slowly stood up from his spot. "If I must." He passed by the group and ignored them as he followed Penny into the hallway and shut the door behind him. Once he had let go of the door knob, he turned around and crossed his arms.

"Yes?" He asked, eyebrow raised.

Penny paused, then smiled easily. "I wanted to thank you for helping me get this job."

"I see," he replied. "You're welcome," he said suddenly, and turned around to open the door.

"Wait!" She cried, arm outstretched. "Not yet," she extended the arm with the plastic bag. "Here."

Sheldon's eyebrow furrowed and he reluctantly reached out and took the plastic bag, clearly confused. "This isn't one of those social situations where one party extends a gift to the other in exchange for their assistance, is it?" He asked.

"It is," she nodded.

"And you are aware that I am against the concept of gift-giving?" He continued, eyebrow still raised.

"I am," she nodded.

He paused. "And?"

"And I don't care. I bought this for you, and you're going to like it," she replied, her tone low and even.

Sheldon surmised she was becoming slightly annoyed by the tone of her voice and by the fact that her previous smile was now absent from her expression.

He sighed and stared at the plastic bag hanging from his fingers. How did he find himself in these situations? He couldn't blame her, of course. It was his fault for being such an endearing and important part of her life. No doubt that the others felt the same. He certainly added a higher level of intelligence to the group, and they were no doubt grateful for his presence.

However, he was not comfortable in accepting gifts, as social convention called for him to accept the gift and return it to her in the form of another gift of equal value. He thought that they had been through this already with the Christmas gift debacle. Although he was beyond thrilled (not a word he used lightly) to have received a signature and DNA remnants from Leonard Nemoy, he still felt a tug of obligation in that the amount of gift baskets he had given her did not equal the weight of her gift. The hug that he had been moved to give her was certainly not worth anything in his mind, but it had obviously appealed to her, as identified by the grip she had held on his waist and the happy statement she had relayed to Leonard.

"Go on," Penny's voice broke into his thoughts. "Open it."

He sighed and resigned himself to accepting the gift. "Very well," he replied curtly, and peered inside the plastic bag. "Oh," he found himself saying out loud. "A mug."

"Not just any mug," he heard Penny say as she reached inside the bag and pulled it out. He saw The Flash logo briefly before she showcased it to him. "See? It's that Flash guy you like so much!"

Sheldon blinked, then slowly reached out a hand and accepted the mug. He couldn't quite explain why no words were coming to him, but he stood there quietly looking over his new mug. It would go perfectly with his collection.

"It's okay if you don't like it," Penny's voice suddenly dropped a register. "I just saw it at the comic book store and Stewart suggested that you might appreciate it."

Sheldon nodded slowly, still staring at the mug. It implied that Penny had actually gone out of her way to find such an acceptable gift. In addition, she had taken the time to imagine what he would like.

He swallowed, then slowly placed the mug back in the plastic bag. "Thank you," he finally managed to say. "I will accept your gift, even though I protest the reason behind it."

Penny smiled. "I'm glad you like it. I really appreciate your help, Sheldon. You've been an absolutely wonderful friend this past week. Even though I still want to strangle you at times," she jabbed a finger into his chest. "You really...do care about your friends," she nodded.

Sheldon nodded, not sure what social convention called for in a situation such as this. His eyes widened slightly as he saw her take a step toward him, arms outstretched. He tensed, pulling in his arms close to his body as she wrapped her arms around his waist, trapping his arms. He could feel his eyebrow twitching as he swallowed and attempted to mentally disconnect himself from the physical connection Penny had created.

Outside of his mind, his eyebrow had stopped twitching. Penny stood there, arms wrapped around him for a full five seconds. Sheldon counted. Growing increasingly uncomfortable with the level of intimacy between them, he cleared his throat loudly and let out a breath as Penny reluctantly stepped away.

"Yes, well," Sheldon began, then opened and closed his mouth several times before turning suddenly and entering the apartment, heading straight for his spot on the couch.

Penny stood in the hallway, staring at the empty space in front of her that had been occupied by a body not two seconds previously. She sighed. Something was definitely going on here. She couldn't figure out what, but she could no longer deny the twinge of emotion she had felt just by standing there, her arms wrapped around Sheldon's tall and skinny frame.

She shook her head and sighed again. Something was definitely going on. With Sheldon.

And ohhh boy, was she in trouble.

00000

_A/N: Whew. Okay. I'm settled in my new apartment. Sorry it took so long, guys. Adjusting to life in Japan took a bit longer than I had expected. So here's a quick chapter to get me writing again. Sorry if it's not up to my usual quality._

_Oh, and the hint that I gave last chapter didn't really apply here. So:_

_Hint for next chapter: Bamboo & Tissues. _


	14. Chapter 14

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Fourteen_

_Crash. Curse._

Penny jerked awake. Opening her eyes, she watched wearily as Leonard stumbled next to the coffee table, glasses askew and pants around his knees.

"What are you doing?" Penny shook her head and watched as he hastily pulled his pants up and hopped to the front door at the same time.

"Nothing," he replied quickly. Too quickly.

"Hold it!" Penny sat up on the couch. "Explain," she ordered, finger pointed in his direction.

"I'm...late," he said quickly, eyes darting back and forth between the hallway and the door.

"You're not la,-"

"Leonard!" Penny heard Sheldon cry from his room, and then heard the muffled sounds of coughing.

Penny's eyes widened. "Oh no you don't!" She jumped up and grabbed Leonard's sleeve, preventing him from moving anywhere.

"Penny," Leonard whined as his cell phone rang. He quickly picked it up. "Yeah. Yeah. Confirmed. Uh-huh. Got it. Well, there's a tiny problem with that..."

"Don't you dare leave me here," Penny leaned in and yelled into the phone, knowing full well that it was Howard on the other line.

Leonard moved his head further away so that she couldn't yell into it again. "Uh-huh," he continued talking. "Yeah. Got it," Leonard moved the phone off his ear and turned to Penny. "Okay, we have a proposal..."

"Nothing you can say right now will make me want to stay here all day and miss work,-"

"We'll each throw in fifty bucks for you to stay here and cover for us all day," Leonard cut in.

"Oh balls," Penny dropped her hand from his coat. Yep, a hundred and fifty bucks would buy her time. Though she wasn't too thrilled about having to take care of a sick Sheldon. Damn them for exploiting her financial situation.

"Okay thanks, bye!" Leonard quickly waved and left the apartment before she could say anything else, the door shutting behind him with a decisive _click_.

"Penny?" She heard Sheldon call from the hallway, his voice muffled and clearly congested. "I'm sick."

Penny sighed and turned around. He was in the hallway with his comforter around his shoulders. She felt a mild twinge of sympathy as she looked him over. He really did look awful. His skin was paler (if that was even possible), his nose was bright red from tissue use, and he looked exhausted.

"Aw, sweetie," she sighed and took a few steps closer. "You don't look so good."

"I want soup," he managed to get out in between sniffles. "Are your limited cooking abilities able to handle chicken soup with little stars and homemade croutons?"

_First back-handed insult of the day_, Penny thought to herself and rolled her eyes. "Campbell's chicken soup and toast," she counter-offered dryly.

"Well," he sniffed and she saw his face tilt a bit higher. "If those are the only options available to me..."

"They are," she replied firmly. "Now go back to bed."

"I don't eat in my bed," Sheldon sniffed and walked over to the couch, sitting on her pillow, which was in his spot.

"Woah, woah," Penny threw a hand in the air. "You want soup _now_?" She asked, incredulous. "It's seven in the morning!"

"Yes, and I've been awake for four hours," he replied as if that explained everything.

"But Sheldon," she whined. "I'm tired."

"Please, please, please, please, please," he replied, and Penny was suddenly reminded of the first time she had helped Sheldon when he was sick.

"Sheldon," she sighed, then closed her eyes. She was exhausted. She had only slept for a few hours, as she had a difficult time falling asleep. The realization that she might have feelings for Sheldon had both shocked and scared her all at the same time.

Last night she had come to the conclusion that something was definitely going on with Sheldon. She couldn't explain why she felt that way, but there was no denying the fact that she was seeing him in a totally different way. It didn't seem romantic. It didn't even seem sexual. Whatever it was, it felt good. She enjoyed being around him.

Unfortunately, she had also come to the conclusion that there was no way in hell Sheldon was ever going to have the same sort of feelings about her. He was so...analytical. Particular. Seemingly beyond any sort of sexual interest.

Penny decided that it was best to just not think about the situation and just act normally around him. Well, as normal as she had been for the past week or so. While there was no point in thinking about anything happening with Sheldon, she was quite happy with how close they had been. Why should she deny herself that closeness?

Yes, she would just let the matter go and let things simply take their course. A small part of her kept thinking that the only reason why she was feeling this way about Sheldon was because she hadn't dated in quite some time. The closeness was something that she craved, and that had to be the reason she was suddenly interested in him.

Penny opened her eyes and stared at a pitiful-looking Sheldon on the couch. He really was in bad shape.

"Fine," she sighed and walked into the kitchen. She opened a cupboard and pulled out a can of soup. "I have a feeling I'm going to regret this," she grumbled.

…

_Oh yes, I regret this._

"...py kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr," Penny finished the song as softly as she could, hoping just one rendition would be enough to put him to sleep.

He coughed, and that hope fell flat on the floor. "I need the baster labeled 'mucous'," he suddenly opened his eyes and sat up in bed.

"Oh, _gross_," Penny exclaimed, disgust written all over her face. "I am _not_ getting you a baster so you can...ugh! Just blow your damn nose like the rest of us, Sheldon," she leaned over and put her hand on his shoulder, pushing him back down on the bed.

"My nose hurts," he protested, allowing himself to be directed back down on his pillow. "Can you get me some Vaseline?" He asked, clearly still congested.

"I will get you the Vaseline if you promise to put it on yourself," Penny replied, nose wrinkling. Feelings for the man or not, she was _not_ rubbing Vaseline on his snot-covered nose.

"Of course I'll put it on myself," he replied. "I don't need any more of your illness-inducing _germs_, now do I?" He asked, eyebrow raised.

Penny stopped short as she was about to take a step away from his bed. "What?" She turned to him, eyes narrowed. "You're blaming _me_ for this?"

"Of course," Sheldon answered with his usual condescension, which sounded ridiculous with his stuffy nose. "Your sudden unexplained behaviours recently have led to an increase in our physical contact, which has brought an exchange of potential sources of infection and disease, which my body has no immunity for."

Penny blinked. "Excuse me?"

Sheldon sighed, then said simply, "You keep touching me. I do not possess any 'cornhusking' antibodies. I am now sick." He gripped the tissue in his hand tightly as he tried to clear his throat.

"'Cornhusking antibodies', hm?" Penny's eyes narrowed once more. She then she leaned forward, grabbed his arm, pulled down his sleeve, and ran her tongue from his elbow to his wrist.

Ignoring his horrified gasp, Penny leaned back and crossed her arms across her chest. "There. If that doesn't allow for plenty of 'cornhusking antibodies', I don't know what will." She leaned forward after a pause. "You're welcome," she said sarcastically.

Sheldon stared at his arm as if it were a separate entity, a horrified expression fixed on his face. "You...you _licked_ me," he finally spat the sentence out. He looked between Penny and his arm several times, a lost expression slowly creeping up on his face. "You..._licked_...me."

"That I did," she nodded, satisfied. "And I'll do a lot worse if you don't lie down and shut up for the next hour or so while I take a damn nap."

"What could possibly be _worse _than,-" Sheldon immediately shut up as Penny leaned forward, her face a mere centimeter away from his. A slow smile curved her lips and she watched as his eyes darted from the side to her gaze, and back again several times. He swallowed, and she watched as his jaw worked through that motion.

"Sheldon?" She asked, her voice low.

He automatically licked his lips and Penny felt her tongue mimic that motion on her own bottom lip. That small action caught Sheldon's eyes, and he looked down to her lips. The muscles around his eye started twitching lightly. He immediately looked back up again.

She then noticed that he had set his jaw and straightened slightly. He seemed to suddenly catch on to the power struggle that was at stake here. "Penny," he answered, although with his cold it came out 'Peddy'.

"Sheldon?" She called out again, barely a whisper.

"Penny," he said again, firmly this time.

Penny leaned in closer to his face and laughed as he jerked his head back, eyes wide in shock. "Take a damn nap, Sheldon," she said as she stood back up and started walking out of his room. Turning around slightly, she gave into her impulses and winked at him as she sauntered out, leaving the door open slightly so she could hear him if he needed her.

Not that he would be needing her anytime soon. No, after that little debacle, she wouldn't be surprised if he never spoke to her again. She sighed sadly. What was she doing? Why was she acting this way? Why was she _feeling _this way? This wasn't right. It just...wasn't right to feel this way about Sheldon. It was _Sheldon_ for crying out loud. There was no future, there wasn't even a possibility of one. Why was she trying? _Was _she trying?

Shaking her head, Penny reached up and held her forehead, her fingers brushing over the scab where she broke the skin during her fall last week. This was too much. This was just too weird.

She needed to sleep.

A nap was definitely in order.

Then...then she would tackle the big questions.

…

An hour later, Penny was woken up for the second time that day. This time to the gut-wrenching noises that were coming from the bathroom.

"Oh, sweetie," Penny jumped up from the couch and rushed into the bathroom. She stopped short and felt her head shake in sympathy as she watched Sheldon's body heave over the toilet, tissues still clenched firmly in both hands. She took a step forward and placed her hand on his back, rubbing in circles through the robe. "Are you okay?"

"Do I look okay?" Sheldon replied as he lifted his head wearily. His lips were white, and he was sweating profusely.

"Oh my god, Sheldon," Penny whispered. "I don't think this is a cold."

His head lolled forward once more. "My temperature has been rising steadily for the past couple of hours."

Penny stood slightly, reluctant to move her hand from his back and break the physical connection. She leaned over as far as she could to the sink. Turning it on, she grabbed the nearest face cloth and wet it. Wringing it out as best she could with only one hand, she turned the water off. Rubbing his back once more, she softly asked him to lift his head. He complied, and she carefully dabbed around his face.

"Feel better?" She asked.

"Adding moisture to one's face does not assist in curing an illness, Penny," Sheldon replied, clearly irritable.

"I meant are you finished throwing up?" Penny bit out, closing her eyes. It was hard to feel sympathy for someone who was well enough to attempt insults.

"Oh," he blinked. "Yes, I believe so," he replied, then dropped his used tissues into the trash can. He shifted, and Penny could sense that he was about to stand. She wrapped her arm around his waist and tried to help him. Stumbling together, he in his weakness, and she because of his added weight, they slowly made their way to the sink. Penny knew he would want to immediately brush his teeth.

"Thank you," she heard him mutter as they arrived at the sink. She smiled as he reached for his toothbrush and began brushing his teeth.

"Do you want to go see a doctor?" She asked hesitantly, unsure of what do to at this point. It was probably just the flu. In Sheldon's mind, though, it was probably some unknown disease that would require a team of doctors to cure. She smiled to herself. Knowing Sheldon, he probably probably had throat cultures and books filled with notes to help them along.

"I see no reason to expose myself to a plethora of new diseases," he replied wearily as he finished brushing his teeth.

"What?" Penny frowned, confused.

He sighed again. "Hospitals are full of sick people. I do not wish to contract another illness."

"Yeah, I got that," Penny rolled her eyes. "But you went to the hospital when I was there last week," she pointed out, frowning slightly.

"That was different."

"How?" Penny asked, still confused. When he didn't answer, she pressed on. "I just don't understand why you would avoid the doctor's office when you're this sick."

"I just explained, -ohhh, I'm too tired for this," Sheldon turned and started walking out of the bathroom.

"Okay, sweetie, let's just get you back into bed," Penny pat his back slightly, following him.

"Your wording is amusing," he replied as he allowed himself to be directed back into his bedroom.

Penny was surprised that he was still allowing her to touch him in any way. He had just mentioned that she was the reason why he was sick. Plus, there was that little situation between her tongue and his arm.

_He must be really sick_, Penny thought to herself.

"Do you want anything right now?" She asked, waiting until he was situated in the bed before pulling the covers over him.

"Grilled cheese sandwich."

"No, you'll just throw it up again," Penny shook her head. "I'll make you some tomato soup."

Sheldon sighed and settled in. "If I must."

Penny nodded and quickly made her way out of his room and down the hallway. As she entered the kitchen, she immediately reached for the nearest cupboard and located a can of tomato soup.

_Okay, sweetie, let's just get you back into bed._

_Your wording is amusing._

"Wait, what?" Penny's face screwed up in confusion and she dropped the can of soup onto the counter. Did...did Sheldon just made a joke?

Did Sheldon just make a _sexual _joke?

_Good lord, _Penny thought to herself. _He must be REALLY sick._

Flabbergasted, she shook her head and went about finding a pot to warm up the soup.

"Penny!" She heard her name. It still sounded like 'Peddy'.

Putting the can back down on the counter, Penny ran back into his room. "What's wrong?" She looked around, confused.

"Can you rub this on my chest?" He held out a small container of VapoRub.

"Sheldon," Penny whined and threw her head back. Of course. She should have known this was coming. "Damnit," she took a step forward and jerked the container out of his hand. "Sheldon I don't understand. You're a grown man. Surely you can handle,-" she trailed off as Sheldon lifted his shirt and stared at her expectantly.

Oh. Right. His chest.

"Um, Sheldon, maybe I shouldn't,-"

"VapoRub makes my hands smell funny," he sniffed.

"Yeah, I got that from the last time," Penny replied, eyes screwed shut.

_Okay, _she thought_, I can do this._

It was just rubbing VapoRub on his chest. She had done it before. Why did it suddenly feel so intimate?

Sighing, she dipped her fingers into the container and rubbed the cream over her whole hand. She set the container back down on the bed and reached out, placing her hand in the middle of his warm chest.

"Your fingers are cold," he protested.

"Your chest is hot," she countered, then flushed. Yeah, that was the wrong thing to say.

"Counter-clockwise," he reminded her, clearly not catching on to her mistake.

"Yeah, yeah," she muttered, then began rubbing circles on his chest. Light chest hair tickled her fingers as she slowly rubbed around. Sighing inwardly, she berated herself for enjoying the feel of skin on skin. This was Sheldon, for crying out loud. Why was she getting so excited about feeling his chest under her hand?

Unable to stop herself, she began rubbing in wider circles, starting from the sides of his ribs, lightly brushing over his navel with her palm, and running back up the other side. When he said nothing, she continued, scooping out a little more VapoRub and rubbing circles on his upper chest, fingers delving under his pulled-up shirt and brushing the underside of his collarbones. Looking up at his face, she saw his eyebrow twitch, and decided to play it safe by simply continuing in circles over his sparse chest hair.

"You're really pale, you know that?" She murmured, uncomfortable with the silence as she touched him.

"I do not care to expose myself to skin cancers," he corrected, his voice low.

Shivering slightly, Penny jerked her hand back. His skin. His voice. Yeah. She should stop now.

"Okay," she cleared her throat. "We good?"

Sheldon looked down to his chest and sniffed once more. "I suppose," he replied, and pulled his shirt back down slightly. Penny watched as skin disappeared under dark plaid flannel, and shook her head. "I'm sleepy," he said, eyes already shut. "Now go away."

Snorting, Penny stood up and tossed the container of VapoRub on his nightstand. "You're welcome," she stressed and waited for a response. When none came, Penny shook her head and walked away. Feeling her nose tingle, Penny reached up and rubbed her nose. Getting a whiff of VapoRub, Penny shivered again.

Oh yes. She was definitely in trouble.

And she was never going to be able to smell VapoRub again without feeling a ghost of warm skin under her hand.

Shaking her head, and ignoring the warm feeling she felt in her body, Penny walked toward the couch. "Nap. Again."

00000

_N/A: Sorry it took so long for an update, guys. These 12-hour work days are killing me. I'll try to keep updating every couple of days._

_Reviews are love. :)_


	15. Chapter 15

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Fifteen_

"Is it just me, or does it seem weird without Sheldon here?" Raj asked, looking around to Howard and Leonard as they stood around his TV, setting up for Halo.

They paused, and then all three laughed at the same time.

"Good one, Raj," Howard sniggered, and plugged the controllers in. "Okay, I think we're all set here."

"Okay, Raj, I need to use your bathroom before we start," Leonard cut in, carrying his controller over to the coffee table before jogging lightly in the direction of the bathroom.

Howard sighed and settled in on the couch. He opened a pizza box that was sitting on the coffee table. "Man, it feels great to eat pizza _while_ playing Halo," he said before picking up a slice and taking a bite.

"Dude, I've been meaning to ask you," Raj paused for a moment. "Have you noticed anything weird going on between Sheldon and Penny?"

"It's Sheldon," Howard stressed, turning to his friend. "Any sentence that has to do with him has to have the word 'weird' in it."

"True, even having 'Sheldon' and 'Penny' in the same sentence is weird, don't you think?" Raj was easily distracted, forgetting his original question and instead reaching for a slice of pizza.

"Not necessarily. I mean...'Oh, look, Penny is strangling Sheldon'," Howard replied casually, shrugging.

Raj nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, that works."

"Okay, you guys ready?" Leonard broke into the conversation as he came back into the room, flopping down on the couch next to Raj. "You know, I feel kind of bad about convincing Penny to stay with Sheldon all day," he said as he picked up his controller.

"Fifty bucks well spent," Howard replied wistfully.

"Would you rather go back to your apartment?" Raj asked.

Leonard paused, then blinked. "I said I felt bad, I didn't say I was going to do anything about it."

"Huh," Raj shrugged. "Fair enough."

They all smiled as they started playing.

…

"Penny!"

'Peddy' sighed as she stood up from the couch and set her laptop on the coffee table. She slowly made her way over to the hallway. "Yes?" She asked once she had reached Sheldon's open door.

"I want orange juice," he stated, then blew his nose. "Oh lord, we've reached milky green," he commented miserably, looking down into his tissue.

"You're so disgusting when you're sick," Penny sighed, then walked away to get him a glass of orange juice. She came back a few minutes later with a tall glass of juice in her hand. She walked up to the side of the bed and handed him the glass. "Here."

Sheldon took the glass and threw a pill in his mouth. He took a long sip before handing the glass back.

"What am I supposed to do with this?" Penny asked, at a loss.

"I don't care," he replied, settling back into his pillows.

Sighing, Penny set the glass down on his nightstand.

"Coaster," he reminded her.

"Oh balls," Penny stomped away and returned back with a coaster. "There," she put it under the glass. "Happy now?"

"I'm not unhappy," he replied, closing his eyes slightly.

"Great," Penny turned to walk away again.

"Penny?"

"What do you want, Sheldon?"

One eye peeked open to make sure she was still there. Penny waited for several moments before he finally spoke again.

"Thank you for taking care of me."

Penny felt a smile warm across her face. She walked back to the side of his bed and reached out for his face, brushing her fingertips lightly down his cheek without thinking about it. "Aw, you're welcome sweetie."

She waited for Sheldon to say something about the light touch to his face, but he remained silent, eyes still closed. A bit bolder now, Penny reached out again and lightly allowed her hand to brush the top of his head, his hair tickling her palm and fingers. When he said nothing about that, she allowed her fingers to sink into his hair, slowly massaging his scalp as they went from his forehead to as far back as she could reach on the back of his head before the pillow stopped her.

"Sheldon?" She asked softly as she continued her ministrations. "Can I ask you a question?"

"I assume you can," he replied. "Although I'm not at all certain you may be able to understand the answer."

Narrowing her eyes, Penny decided to let that one slide. "Why have you been letting me touch you lately?" She just came out and asked it. "You don't like to be touched."

"I don't," he replied, eyes still shut.

"Well?" She pressed, her hand stilling in his hair.

"I suppose if I must answer, then the appropriate response would be 'curiosity'," he finally replied. "You are correct in stating that I am uncomfortable being in close proximity to others. I have found recently that I am curious as to the reason why you seek out opportunities to touch me."

"So you're letting me touch you because you're trying to find out why I want to touch you?" She asked, frowning in confusion.

He remained silent, and Penny sighed again.

"Well, either way," she continued. "You're welcome. You took care of me, and now I'm taking care of you." She moved her hand from the top of his head, feeling the bite of cold air on her palm as she removed it. She waited for him to respond for several moments. When none came, she turned to walk away.

"Penny?"

She stifled a groan and turned back around. "Yes Sheldon?"

"Is it really the social convention to give flowers to someone in order to lift their spirits?" One eyebrow was lowered, but his eyes remained shut.

"Well, sure," Penny replied. "We give flowers to cheer people up. Or to congratulate them in some way," she added. "It makes people feel better. Why?" She asked.

"My mother implied that I should give some sort of gift to someone who was recently injured."

Penny blinked. Was he talking about her? "Oh. Well...yes, that is the social convention," she answered hesitantly.

A pause. "Penny?"

"Yes Sheldon?" She closed her eyes and shook her head. She was getting sick of hearing her name.

"I don't like flowers."

"I wasn't planning on getting you any," she replied, eyebrow raised.

"Good," he replied. "I would much rather an additional DDR3 memory stick for my laptop."

"I'll pass that along," Penny replied sardonically.

"Penny?"

"Sheldon?"

"Do you like flowers?"

The question caught her off-guard. "Um, well..." Where the heck did that question come from? "I like the meaning behind flowers," she finally replied slowly. "Like, the idea that someone cared enough to go out of their way to get me something they think I might enjoy."

Sheldon's eyes opened slightly as he repeated that comment in his head. The image of his new Flash mug flitted through his mind. He thought about it for a minute. Yes, he thought to himself, he liked that idea as well.

A hand reached down and softly resumed its path through his hair.

"Penny?"

"Yes?"

"You're touching my hair," he stated.

"Yes," he heard her reply.

He paused, hesitant for some reason. "I...find it soothing," he finally said.

"It's supposed to be," she replied.

"Fascinating."

Penny smiled as she was reminded of a particular character from Star Trek. "Sheldon," she asked. "Do you ever think that you're some different kind of species that was sent here to study us and learn our weaknesses?"

"Every day I come one step closer to proving that theory," she heard him mutter.

"Hmm," she replied, and continued stroking his hair.

"Penny?"

"Yes?" She replied.

"I'm sleepy. Get out."

Penny rolled her eyes. "Feel better soon Sheldon, I don't want to have to repeat this tomorrow," she sighed as she withdrew her hand from his hair and walked out of his room, leaving the door open half-way. She walked into the living room and reached for the remote. Turning on the TV as she slumped down into Sheldon's spot, she pressed play on the DVD remote. Smiling happily as the Star Trek theme song came on, she continued her journey through season one of the original series.

…

"_Captain, I am not at all certain that..."_

A sound caught Penny's attention and she dragged her eyes away from the screen. Sheldon was shuffling down the hallway, comforter around his shoulders.

"What are you doing?" She asked, frowning.

"I slept. I'm awake. Star Trek is on," he replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Move over," he commanded as he walked up to his spot.

Sighing, Penny shifted over to the middle of the couch and watched as Sheldon sat down in his spot.

"Happy?" She asked sarcastically once he was settled.

He ignored her, and instead sniffled.

Penny shook her head and leaned over. If she wasn't allowed to sit _where_ she wanted, she was at least going to sit the _way_ she wanted. Leaning heavily against his arm, Penny sighed happily. He was warm. Bolder now that she had been allowed to touch him several times today, Penny reached under his comforter and found his arm with her hand. Linking her arm with his, she settled her head against his shoulder and continued watching the episode.

She felt Sheldon's body stiffen next to her.

"Penny?"

"Yes Sheldon?" She replied.

"I'm not at all comfortable with your proximity," she heard him reply from above her head. Closing her eyes in disappointment, she sighed. Well, it was coming eventually. She knew that he wouldn't allow her to continue getting closer to him, but a small part of her had hoped that he would allow it.

She was only linking her arm in his. Why was he now bringing up the fact that he was uncomfortable?

She removed her arm from his and rested it on her lap. She was about to sit up straight, but then she decided to test a theory.

"Better?" She asked, hoping that 'yes' would be the answer. She didn't want to remove her head from his shoulder. It felt so nice being that close to him. In fact, she couldn't remember being so comfortable and satisfied with one tiny little action before. It brought a sense of peace to her body that she had never felt before, and she had begun to crave that feeling.

"It's tolerable," he replied tightly after a pause.

She could tell from his tone that he still wasn't a hundred percent comfortable, but she wasn't about to move. He had given her semi-permission to lay there and she was running with it.

"Okay," she replied softly, closing her eyes and smiling. This was good. This was enough, she sighed to herself.

00000

_A/N: Whew. Short chapter. :) Hope you liked it. I have a feeling this fic is going to be quite long. Sheldon just refuses to let Penny any closer, no matter how hard I try to write it. ;) Don't worry...I'll wear him down eventually._


	16. Chapter 16

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Sixteen_

"Tell me again why I'm here?" Penny asked wearily as she picked up a comic book and examined its cover.

"Because Leonard, Koothrappali, and Wolowitz have once again disrupted my weekly Thursday schedule by deciding to partake in a 'rodeo' at a local western-themed bar," Sheldon answered, quickly rifling through a row of comic books.

"Seriously?" Penny frowned.

"'Anything Can Happen Thursdays' are the bane of my existence, Penny," he replied, eyes still glued to the task at hand.

"Yeah, well, I'm starting to think 'Anything Can Happen Thursdays' is really just 'Let's Dump Sheldon on Penny Thursdays' in disguise," Penny muttered under her breath.

"I should hope not," Sheldon's head lifted as he turned to look at her. "That would be rather painful."

Penny glared at him. Sarcasm was still completely lost on Sheldon at times.

"Hey Penny."

Penny turned around to see the store's owner pop up next to her. "Oh hey Stuart," she greeted him.

"So, what are you up to?" He asked slowly, bobbing his head. She smiled at his awkwardness.

"Oh, you know, catching up on the latest Batman," she replied sarcastically as she held up a copy of an old Batman comic nearby.

Stuart laughed, and Penny saw Sheldon turn and frown out of the corner of her eye. He immediately walked away from them and in the opposite direction. Penny frowned. What was that all about?

Brushing it aside, she turned back to Stuart. "Hey, I wanted to thank you again for helping me pick out that coffee mug for Sheldon."

"Yeah, no problem," he replied, his hand finding its way to the back of his neck. "I mean, you probably could have picked out anything in the store and it probably would have interested him."

"Yeah, but I think he really liked the idea of a _Flash _mug," she nodded and then jumped as a comic book was suddenly in front of her face.

"Penny, this is the current issue of Batman. The issue you were holding was from two years ago." Sheldon had returned.

Staring at him while she reached out and took the comic, she bit the inside of her cheek and shook her head. "Thank you," she replied, clearly not.

"I wasn't aware you had recently become interested in comic books," he gave her an awkward smile and walked away. She tossed the comic book onto a nearby shelf and rolled her eyes once he had turned around and headed to the register.

"Yeah, I'd better..." Stuart gestured to the register.

"Oh, sure," she nodded and smiled. She followed him and stood next to Sheldon as he paid. Once his sale was completed, she said goodbye to Stuart and followed Sheldon outside.

"So," she said once they were standing on the sidewalk. "What's the plan for tonight?" She asked.

"Well, today is Thursday, so,-"

"Yeah that's great," she cut him off. "Listen, I finally rolled all of my coins and cashed them at the bank today, so I have a few extra dollars. I want to go check out that new pizza place down the street, they sell pizza by the slice."

"By the slice?" She heard Sheldon exclaim as they both walked to her car.

"Yeah, by the slice," she repeated. "Let me guess, that's going to be a problem?" She asked, not surprised.

"Where do I even begin?" He said as he clutched his bag of comic books to his chest.

"I don't really care as long as you get in the car and keep the volume down while I drive us there," she said as she slid into the driver's seat.

…

It took quite a bit of convincing, but Penny had finally managed to get Sheldon to exit the car and follow her into the tiny restaurant around the corner. Opening the door, she saw a counter and three tables. It was a pretty small place, and appeared to be mostly for lunch take-out.

"Come on," she grabbed at his arm and led him to the end of the counter.

"Hello, can I help you?" The girl on the other side of the counter smiled.

"A slice of cheese pizza, please," Penny ordered and watched as the girl picked up a slice with a pair of tongs and slid it into a waiting oven to heat it up.

"And for you?" The girl turned to Sheldon.

He cleared his throat. "I'd like a _personal _sized pepperoni and olive pizza, please."

"I'm sorry, we don't have personal pizzas...only slices," the girl explained.

"Oh for Gods' sakes, Sheldon, just order a damn slice," Penny snapped.

"Do you know how many people have passed this counter since that pizza has been sitting there?" Sheldon turned to Penny and argued with her. "Based on the size of this restaurant, I'm guessing there could have been up to three people working today and any one of them could have _touched_ that slice with their bare ha,-"

"_Sheldon_."

"Oh, I see," the girl behind the counter was nodding. "It's okay, my brother is OCD as well. We have a fresh pepperoni pizza coming out of the oven in about two minutes. Would you like a fresh slice from that one?"

"I'm not obsessive com,-"

"He'll take it, thank you," Penny cut him off and dragged him in the direction of the register by his arm again. After they had paid and Penny's slice was ready, they both sat down at a tiny table near the front.

"Why do you have to be so difficult all the time?" Penny asked, sighing as she picked up her pizza.

"I'm not difficult, I am simply aware of the dangers involved when food is left unattended on a counter for several hours," Sheldon stressed, still clutching his comic books. Penny looked up and almost smiled. The table was way too short for him. He looked like he was sitting at a kid's table.

"Here you go," the girl came up to Sheldon and handed him a plate with his slice on it. Bless the girl, she had put on plastic food gloves.

"Thank you," he replied once he saw the gloves. She nodded and went back to her spot behind the counter. He still looked a bit skeptical, though, as he examined his slice carefully.

"Sheldon," she bit out warningly.

Sheldon looked up and caught the look on her face. She watched as he blinked, then slowly reached down and picked up the slice. Taking a bite, he made an unconvincing appetizing noise. She glared at him again.

They then began eating in silence, each preoccupied with their slice. Penny looked up and watched Sheldon as he ate, noticing as the muscles in his neck stood out every time he ducked his head in for another bite. He looked so awkward sitting there, all limbs. She smiled as a short string of cheese got stuck on his lip. Her smile disappeared as she watched his tongue peek out and grab it. Shaking her head, she took another bite of her pizza. Glancing over, she saw as the girl behind the counter was talking to another employee and looking their way. She could have swore she saw the girl mouth the word 'couple'.

Penny turned back to Sheldon. Good lord, did they think they were a couple? She thought about that for a minute, then snorted.

"Are you laughing at your questionable table manners or that picture of the cat on the wall that wants to 'haz pizza'?" Sheldon asked in all seriousness.

"Neither," she replied. "Just thinking that this sort of feels like a date," she took another bite.

"Well that would be impossible as you and I are not 'dating'."

"Yes," she sighed and closed her eyes. "I'm aware of that, Sheldon."

"And even if we were, I am given to understand that most dates occur in restaurants of higher quality than our current location," he continued, placing the remainder of his pizza down on his plate.

"Not necessarily," she countered, putting down her own slice. "I mean, dates can be anywhere. Fancy or casual restaurants. In fact, most people who are dating usually just hang out with one another wherever."

"Fascinating," he replied, then paused for a moment. Penny picked up her slice and took a bite. "Are we dating then?"

Penny choked on the bite she was about to swallow. Coughing several times to clear her airway, she reached for her drink and quickly swallowed half the cup, her face turning bright red as she did so. "_What_?" She demanded once she could speak again.

"Are we dating?" He asked again, slower this time. "We eat meals together. We spend most of our daily activities together. You've developed a new habit of touching or hugging me at every opportunity," he listed, then paused again. "Are we dating?"

Penny's mouth fell open sightly and she stared at him. _Was he serious_? She never, ever thought she would hear those words ever come out of Sheldon's mouth. While one part of her was interested in seeing the reaction if she said 'yes', another part of her was sure that it wouldn't have been a good reaction.

"No, Sheldon," she finally answered. "Two people agree to date. It isn't something that just happens to you."

There was a long pause as he contemplated this answer. "I see," he finally responded before reaching for his slice of pizza and taking another bite.

Penny sat there and watched him, suddenly not hungry at all. Listening to those words leave her mouth was a tad more depressing than she had thought it would have been.

"Penny, you seem upset," she blinked and saw that he had stopped eating and was looking at her intently. "Am I right in assuming that you find the idea of 'dating' me appealing?"

Penny sighed and closed her eyes. "Sheldon, I don't want to talk about it." It would just depress her even more.

"Fair enough," he replied.

"You don't date," she replied quietly after a pause.

"I've never felt the urge to," he replied. "It seems to be an impractical approach to fulfilling one's sexual and emotional needs."

"Oh?" She said, then thought about her past relationships. "Well, maybe you're right."

"The idea of friends with benefits, on the other hand, seems to be a much more realistic concept, provided both parties could handle such a relationship, as you once pointed out."

Penny blinked. Yeah, that was not something she wanted to hear at the moment.

_Wait a minute_, she thought, _was he trying to insinuate..._

No. Just, no. She shook her head. This was Sheldon. It was just wishful thinking on her part. But still...

"Would...would you _want _to participate in a relationship like that?" She asked hesitantly. It was difficult to think of Sheldon in _any _sort of sexual context, but her mind was more than happy to bring up several mental images for her.

"Just because I find something to be beneficial doesn't mean that I wish to participate in it. For example, prune juice is supposedly a natural laxative, and yet I've never tried it because I simply do not appreciate the taste of prune juice," he explained. "I would much rather increase the amount of soluble fiber in my daily diet."

"You know, you can turn almost any conversation into an update on your bowels," Penny remarked casually.

Sheldon tilted his head in mild confusion. Penny just shook her head.

They both continued eating in silence. After they had both finished their slices, they sat there for a moment. He was awkwardly twitching in his chair, rubbing his hand up and down his thigh. She watched his discomfort for a few minutes before finally speaking.

"Want to go home and watch some more Star Trek?" She offered.

"Does a carbon atom have six electrons?" He asked.

"Um," she trailed off, confused. "I'm going to go with yes?"

"Very good, Penny," Sheldon gave her one of his classic creepy smiles. She found herself smiling back as they stood and threw away their paper plates. As they began walking out, Penny found her arm brushing his and smiled again. Okay, maybe it wasn't a _date_ date, but...

Discussions on bowel movements, human social behavior, non-Sheldon approved pizza, and several hours of Star Trek.

She smiled again as they made their way to her car. She decided she liked this more than a fancy dinner and a pretentious movie.

…

"Dude, was that Penny and Sheldon?" Raj glued himself to the car window as they drove down the road.

"Are you high?" Howard scoffed from the front seat. "There isn't a Sheldon-approved restaurant for miles from his area."

"Yeah, I don't think it was them, Raj," Leonard called back to his friend in the back seat.

Raj shook his head. "Something really strange is going on here."

Leonard glanced at Raj in the rear view mirror. He had disagreed with his friend out loud, but he had seen it too. Penny and Sheldon were walking out of a new pizza place. Seeing Penny smiling as she walked to her car wasn't what shocked him in that quick moment of recognition.

It was the smile on _Sheldon's _face.

Yeah. He was going to have to have a talk with someone.

This time with Sheldon.

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_A/N: Yay! New update. I'm so glad you guys are enjoying this fic! It really makes my day when I see a new review in my inbox. :) You guys are awesome._


	17. Chapter 17

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Seventeen_

Sheldon focused on his white board, willing the black markings to somehow spontaneously jump around and arrange themselves in an order which would balance out the equation.

"Why?" He asked himself out loud. Why couldn't he visualize it? He had been having similar issues all week. It had nothing to do with his ability or intellect, clearly. Still, he seemed to be...distracted all week; that day especially. There was no clear explanation other than a handful of unplanned and unwelcome changes to his otherwise perfect weekly schedule. Even those disturbing alterations should not have caused such a distraction, in his mind.

He tapped his finger against his arm and continued to stare. Without warning, the door behind him opened as someone rapped a quick knock. Sheldon turned his head slightly to watch as Leonard's head peered around the door.

"Hey buddy!"

Sheldon's eyebrow twitched at the overly enthusiastic greeting.

"Buddy," he drawled in response, confused.

"You got a minute?" Leonard took a step forward and shut the door behind him. He then stood beside the chair in front of Sheldon's desk.

"I suppose," Sheldon sighed and capped his marker. Making his way around the desk, he carefully situated himself in his chair. After pulling down his sleeves and smoothing out his shirt, he finally clasped his hands together on his desk and raised his head. "Yes?" He asked, indicating he was ready to begin the no-doubt tedious conversation with his roommate.

"So, Sheldon," Leonard began hesitantly, his attention focused on his fidgeting hands. "Well, I want to talk to you about Penny."

Sheldon felt his spine stiffen in response, though his body's reasons for doing so were unclear to him. "Penny?" He repeated, eyebrow raised to indicate that the topic choice was a ridiculous one.

"Yeah, um, listen..." Leonard began slowly, ignoring Sheldon's tone and leaning forward to rest his elbows awkwardly on his knees. "Um, lately we've all noticed that you and Penny have been...well, closer than usual," he paused. "A lot closer than usual," he corrected himself. "And...well...wh-what's up with that?" Leonard sat back up and crossed his arms over his chest, waiting expectantly for an answer. On the surface, he appeared confident at last, but Sheldon could see his leg jerking up and down, a nervous gesture.

"Are you asking me to present a possible explanation regarding the apparent relationship paradigm alteration between Penny and myself?"

"Maybe not exactly in those words, but sure," Leonard responded, still bouncing his leg.

Sheldon pondered this for a moment. It wasn't surprising to him that Leonard, Koothrappali, and Wolowitz had caught on to this new development with Penny. After all, it had been over a week since he himself had seen a change in their usual interactions. It was only natural that they would have reached this conclusion days after him. After all, their limited intellectual abilities were far beneath his own.

"Are you two...dating?" Leonard's voice had seemed to climb to a higher register and he choked on that last word, both indicative of an emotional turmoil.

"Actually, I have it on very good authority that we are, in fact, _not_ dating," Sheldon supplied, recalling the conversation topic of the evening prior.

"Okay, so...what's going on?" Leonard asked, frowning. His voice was back to its usual low tones.

"Well, I've actually given this a bit of thought," Sheldon clasped his hands tightly and leaned forward. "We appear to be two individuals who have experienced a series of shared events which have both induced and appealed to basic human emotional needs. As a result, our original relationship paradigm has been altered, and a new paradigm has taken its place."

Leonard blinked, confused. "Okay, so what is this new relationship paradigm?"

Sheldon looked down as his cell phone rang from his pocket. He reached down into it and pulled out his phone. He glanced up at Leonard. "That's as far as I've gotten, Leonard. You know the significance of the social sciences continued to elude me." He answered his phone and brought it to his ear without looking to see who it was. "Hello?

"Hey Sheldon!"

"Oh...hello Penny."

"Guess what?"

"Penny, there are too many variables present which are preventing me from deducing your current predicament. We would save wasted time and effort if you simply just informed me," he spoke into the phone, feeling a sigh radiate through his body. Some days he feared she would never understand how the mathematical world operated.

"Yeah, whatever," her voice came through after a pause. "Listen, Dr. Muller called me back and she wants me to start on Monday!"

Sheldon immediately retracted the phone from his ear to avoid the inevitable squeal that would have accompanied that statement. After mentally counting to three, he brought the phone back to his ear. "I trust you'll be able to find some appropriate clothing for the occasion?" He replied.

"Geez, Sheldon, I'm not an idiot. I do have business-appropriate clothing."

"I'm glad to hear that," he replied flatly. "Please don't call me again at work. Goodbye." He hung up the phone. Putting it back into his pocket, he clasped his hands on his desk once more and raised his head to meet Leonard's eyes.

Leonard was staring at him with an odd expression on his face. He watched as his roommate lifted a hand and pointed at his face. "Y-you do realize you're _smiling_?"

Sheldon felt his eyebrows drop. "Don't be absurd, I'm not,-" he turned to see his reflection in his laptop's black screen and paused, shocked for the third time in his life. There. He lifted a hand to his face and ran his finger over the corner of his lips. Sure enough, his lips were contorted into a lopsided grin. He continued to stare for a moment longer while his fingers slowly fell from his lips.

After a minute had passed, Sheldon immediately dropped the expression and turned his head back to Leonard. Swallowing, he then blinked twice. It became immediately apparent to him that he needed to examine this chain of events. Picking up his marker from his desk, he spotted an empty white board in the corner of his office. "If you'll excuse me, I have _actual_ work to do," he said as he stood up and made his way around his desk. "I trust you will find your way out," he added as he approached the board and drew a rough diagram.

"Uh, yeah," Leonard stood up and walked out of the room as fast as he possibly could. This was bad. Oh, this was very bad. His talk with Sheldon had confirmed what he had feared: something _was_ going on between Sheldon and Penny.

He needed to talk to someone about this.

00000

_A/N: Sorry guys! Just a short chapter to get the creative juices flowing! ;) I have a fantastic plan for the next chapter, though. Oh yes, the realization is coming, guys. ;) Promise._

_Reviews are tiny encouragements. :3_


	18. Chapter 18

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Eighteen_

"Holy..."

"Wow."

"Yeah," Leonard sighed as he leaned further into Raj's couch.

"So," Raj broke the silence after a minute or two had passed. "He's still..."

"Yep."

"And..."

"He's filled his office with ten white boards," Leonard confirmed, nodding his head.

"So, do we just leave him there at the university all night?" Howard asked, leaning forward and clasping his hands together. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I think it's a fantastic idea, but there is a strong possibility that the night staff might call the cops on us for leaving him there alone again."

"Yeah, I never understood that," Raj frowned. "Why _did _they call the police?"

"Because Sheldon was lurking in the electron laser lab and cackling every time he deleted Leslie's name off of the high-energy electron laser sign-up sheet," Leonard frowned at the memory. "The night maintenance staff were afraid for their lives."

"Not that I blame them," Howard added quickly. "I would be too...in fact, I'm still waiting for Sheldon to discover his tangerine chicken is actually orange chicken. I believe that will be the final push that will send him into super-villain territory."

"Back to the task at hand, please," Leonard cut in loudly. The last thing he wanted to think about was Sheldon's tipping point. At the moment, he could already be on the brink of a mental breakdown. The idea of Sheldon and Penny had mystified everyone else...it was only natural that Sheldon's reaction would be ten times worse.

"So what should we do?" Raj asked again. "Do we leave him there? Do we go pick him up?"

They all sat and pondered this for a moment.

"Well, I vote we just leave him there," Howard finally spoke up, raising a hand in the air. "I mean, I don't know about you guys, but if he's content to stare at his white boards all night long and refuse a ride home, then I'm perfectly okay with that. It'll be a Sheldon-free Friday," his voice became wistful and he smiled happily, most likely imagining a Sheldon-free world.

"We can't just leave him to his own devices," Leonard argued. "Who knows what will happen?"

"I say we let Penny deal with it," Raj finally spoke.

"What?" They both stared at him as if he were insane.

"She's the one that started this mess. I say we let her clean it up," he shrugged his shoulders and looked around. "And besides, if there is really something going on between them like we think there is...it should be a piece of cheese danish for her to convince him to go home."

"Piece of cake," Howard corrected him. "The phrase is 'piece of cake'."

"Yeah, I know, but I have a really bad craving for cheese danish right now," Raj replied easily.

"Cheese danish? Seriously?" Leonard asked, incredulous.

"Actually," Howard said slowly. "I could go for a bear claw," he shrugged his shoulders and cocked his head slightly.

Leonard stared at the two of them as if they were insane. Something was going on between Sheldon and Penny and they were concerned with pastries? Oh...

"I could go for a muffin," Leonard admitted out loud suddenly, looking off into the distance.

"Starbucks?" Howard suggested hopefully.

"Ugh, _Starbucks_. How pretentious," Raj scoffed. "What? Seven Eleven isn't good enough for you?"

"Okay, we'll go to Seven Eleven," Howard blinked and shrugged.

"No, Starbucks is okay," Raj said quickly and stood up.

Howard rolled his eyes.

…

"Oh man this place is like a maze," Penny muttered to herself as she roamed the hallways of Cal Tech, searching for one office in particular. "Have I been down this hallway already?" She paused and turned around, frowning. Footsteps and loud squeaky wheels came from her left, and Penny turned to see a cleaning lady pushing a maintenance cart in her direction.

"Oh, excuse me," Penny called out, hoping to get her attention. "I'm lost, do you know where Sheldon Cooper's office is?"

The lady looked up, but there was no recognition on her face. She shook her head slightly. "No...no English," she muttered under her breath before pushing the cart down the hallway again.

"Um, Dr. Cooper?" Penny tried again, desperate. Names were the same in Spanish as they were in English...right?

At the mention of 'Dr. Cooper', the lady's eyes opened wider than Penny thought possible and she threw a hand over her heart. "Doctor Cooper? Ay dios mio!" She quickly made the sign of the cross and quickly turned and ran the way Penny had just come, leaving her cart behind.

Penny blinked and watched as the woman ran away. "Okay," she spoke out loud, nonplussed. "If she ran in that direction, I'm going to guess his office is in this direction," she pointed down the opposite hallway and began walking toward it. Checking the names on the doors, she sighed and continued on. He had to be around here somewhere...

"Ah hah!" She cried loudly, pointing to the door with the name 'Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, PhD' on the front of it. "Found it," she smiled happily and rested her hand on the door. This was so exciting, she had never been inside his office before. After receiving a somewhat confusing call from Leonard, she had skipped over the sketchy details until she heard 'pick up' 'Sheldon' and 'office'. She had always wanted to see where they worked, and after taking her short tour of the University after her interview on Monday, she was now eager to see their offices.

Opening the door slightly, she saw Sheldon standing with his back to her, the red of his Flash t-shirt hunched over a white board in front of it. The room was small and sparse, with plenty of credentials and awards on the walls. It was also filled to the brim with white boards, each more confusing than the last. Penny leaned in closer to the room to try and read them, but she couldn't make sense of any of it. It must have been a complicated physics equation.

"Sheldon?" She called out, surprised that he hadn't turned around the moment she opened the door.

"Penny?" Sheldon's voice sounded surprised as he turned around and stared at her, eyes wide.

"What are you doing?" She asked, ignoring the way he was looking at her and skimming the boards once more.

"Penny, this is my office," Sheldon replied, blinking. "Penny, you can't be in my office."

"Why not?" Penny asked, frowning. "The other guys visit you here every day, don't they?"

There was a short pause.

"Penny, this is my office," Sheldon repeated. "Penny, you can't be in my office."

"Well I'm here," Penny sighed. "Leonard called me and basically said you'd finally snapped. Are you stuck on a physics problem or something?" She asked, genuinely concerned once she had mentally counted how many white boards he had going at once.

"Penny, please," Sheldon straightened and put the cap on his marker. "Don't you think if I were having a 'physics problem', I would have solved it by now?" He asked in his usual condescending matter.

"I don't know," she muttered under her breath, annoyed. She spotted a chair behind one of the white boards. "Hey, can I sit while you finish your work?" She asked, walking toward the chair.

"I'd rather you not," he replied quickly, which stopped her in her tracks.

"What? Why?" Her eyes widened, confused.

"This is my office, Penny."

"_Sheldon!_" Penny snapped, fully annoyed with his behaviour. "What is your problem all of a sudden? Why are you acting like this?"

"Because this is my office, Penny. There have been a number of changes regarding our relationship paradigm and acceptable levels of physical contact, but my office is my work space, Penny, and I will not tolerate any changes to it. There need to be _boundaries_," he stressed, a bit louder than the rest of his speech.

Penny stood there and her mouth dropped open slightly. It may have been yet another strongly worded speech from an annoyed Sheldon, but it stung harder than a slap in the face to Penny. The word 'boundaries' had especially added a level of instant upset to her stomach. In her mind, Penny assumed Sheldon was finally telling her that he wasn't comfortable with her around him. She had thought that this moment would come all-too-soon, but she had hoped that it would have taken weeks for Sheldon to realize that she was severely overstepping his personal boundaries. Penny nodded slowly, closing her mouth. It was only a matter of time. It was _Sheldon _for crying out loud. Had she expected anything else?

"Okay," she finally spoke, her voice almost a whisper. "I'm sorry." Penny moved toward the door, a sinking feeling making its way up from her stomach to her throat. She hadn't realized that in these two short weeks, she had become this emotionally involved. Perhaps on some level, she had been hoping it would work out. Not dating, of course, because this was Sheldon after all, but a close, intimate friendship would have been nice. After seeing how good of a friend Sheldon could be, she had wanted to discover more of that human hidden beneath his robot exterior.

Nevertheless, the robot had prevailed in pushing her away.

"I'll...move back into my apartment," she blurted out before she had changed her mind. She needed space before this got worse, or her feelings deepened.

"Your power is still off," he reminded her, his voice calm and rational, as usual.

"It doesn't matter," she stopped at the door and turned around to face him. "Clearly my presence is becoming an issue for you. I'll just...get out of your hair for a while. Sorry," she added sincerely as she turned to walk out the door.

"Penny," Sheldon blurted out from behind her.

She turned around. "What?" She asked, half hoping he would apologize and tell her she could stay.

_Yeah right,_ she told herself. _Since when to pigs fly?_

She watched as he shifted his weight before speaking. "You need to drive me home," he finally said.

Penny sighed. "Of course I do. Let's go," she walked out the door, not even bothering to care if he was behind her as she walked down the hall. After a minute of retracing her steps, heavy footfalls eventually caught up to her. Glancing to the side briefly, she saw that he had his messenger bag at his side. No doubt that was what had taken him to long to catch up. She suddenly felt bad for not waiting. After all, it was the least she could do after taking advantage of their couch and food supply for the past two weeks. Not to mention helping her find a new job.

They both continued to walk in silence to her car. Once inside, Penny carefully pulled out of the parking lot and ignored Sheldon's comments about her driving the whole way home. Once she had pulled into the parking lot at their complex, she started to notice Sheldon's shoulders were twitching. Obviously he didn't take kindly to being ignored.

They both exited the car and walked toward the front door. Falling into sync, they both began to climb the stairs up to the fourth floor, focusing their attention on the stairs in front of them.

Penny sighed. She needed to start thinking of Sheldon as her annoying neighbour again. This...whatever this was with her feelings would probably go away once she moved back into her apartment. It was probably the proximity that had brought it on to begin with. Penny's hand curled into a fist around her apartment key. She hadn't used it in a long time.

_How, exactly, am I going to live without power?_ She asked herself, but no answers came to mind.

Once they had reached the fourth floor, Penny turned to move toward her apartment.

"Where are you going?" Sheldon asked.

Penny's eyebrows furrowed as she slowly turned toward him. "Home," she replied as if we had lost it. Had he even listened to her at all in his office?

"You can't go home," he protested, his tone rising slightly in alarm.

"Why not?" She asked.

"Because it's Friday," he explained as if that explained everything.

"And?" She asked.

"It's Chinese food and vintage game night," he reiterated.

"For Gods' sakes, Sheldon..."

"I can't possibly eat our usual order all by myself," he explained, eyes widened slightly at the thought of any more changes to his schedule.

"Well I'm sure Leonard and the guys will be back soon," Penny reassured him and tried to turn around again.

"You can't possibly know that. Looking at the situation from a mathematical,-"

"Oh my God!" Penny yelled and turned back around, stomping across the hallway and yanking Sheldon's key out of his hand. She unlocked the door and slammed it open, storming inside. "Fine, I'll stay and eat Chinese food while you kick my ass at some stupid video game. You happy now?" She fell onto the couch in Sheldon's spot. "And I swear to God, if you even try to move me from this spot, so help me,-"

"You can't sit there," Sheldon immediately protested from where he was standing in the doorway, shocked at the emotional outburst from Penny.

"Why _not_?"

"Because we have to go pick up the Chinese food," Sheldon blinked, pointing toward the staircase.

Letting out a cry of frustration, Penny reached for the nearest pillow and pressed it to her face. "I swear to God, Sheldon, one of these days I'm just going to lose it," she spoke into the pillow after waiting two minutes for her body to calm down. Her voice was muffled, and no doubt incomprehensible to Sheldon.

Sighing, she threw the pillow to the floor, ignoring Sheldon's disapproving cough, and stood up. "Fine," she said, her voice somewhat calm. "Put your bag down, we're going to get Chinese food."

Sheldon immediately took a step forward and placed his messenger bag carefully on his desk. "Tonight we're playing Pong," he said suddenly, a goofy little smile creeping up on his face.

Penny smiled without even thinking of it. He was adorable. In his own little...creepy, geeky way. "Fine," she agreed and followed him to the front door. "Just let me put my purse in my apartment."

"Why?" He asked, stopping as they reached the open door.

"Because I'm going back to my apartment tonight," Penny sighed.

"Your power is still out," Sheldon said for the second time that night.

"It doesn't really matter, does it?" She said again.

"Penny, I see no logical reason why you would,-"

Penny cut him off. "Because clearly you have issues with my presence, Sheldon."

"That's a false assumption," he blinked, looking down at her.

"What do you want, Sheldon?" She sighed. "Do you want me to stay so that you'll have to go all neurotic on me tomorrow morning when your show comes on and I'm still sleeping in your spot?"

"Of course not, I've purchased an alarm for you so you can get up while I'm pouring my bowl of shredded wheat," he replied.

Penny closed her eyes. Of all the ridiculous...

Her body slumped of its own accord. She was tired. She couldn't do this any more.

"Fine," she said. "But I'm not getting up," she pointed a finger into his chest. "Six in the morning is too damn early. I'll get up and move my head to the other side like last week."

Sheldon blinked and paused for a moment. "Agreed."

"Good," she perked up slightly and started walking for the stairs. She waited for Sheldon to lock the door and catch up to her on the stairs before she resumed her descent. She nodded her head, pleased. "Good."

00000

_A/N: Whew...two updates in one week! Horray! I couldn't just leave the story hanging for too long. Hope you liked it! _


	19. Chapter 19

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Nineteen_

Penny jumped as an alarm sounded next to her head. Groaning, she threw her hand over to the side table and managed to locate the snooze button without even opening her eyes.

"Penny," a warning voice came from above her.

Opening her eyes and squinting up, she saw Sheldon standing next to her head, a bowl of shredded wheat in his hands. He raised his eyebrow and gave her an expectant look.

"Fine, fine," she croaked and threw her pillow to the other side of the couch. Once she had re-situated herself on the other end, leaving Sheldon's spot open, he sat down and reached for the remote. Resting the soles of her feet against his thigh, Penny thought nothing of it and closed her eyes again, easily falling asleep despite the relatively quiet sound of the television.

…

"KITE-HO!"

Penny shrieked and jumped from her spot, her arm flailing in front of her, subconsciously defending herself from harm.

"Oh, oops," Howard's voice came from the open front door, sheepish.

Penny glared at Howard and Raj as they stood in the door, each staring at their respective kites to try and avoid her wrath.

"What the hell?" She finally managed to shout out, entirely annoyed that she was once again woken up that morning.

"What's going on?" Leonard came out of the hallway, tying the belt on his robe and shifting his glasses up higher on his nose.

"It appears that Howard and Raj have decided to skip the farmer's market this morning," Sheldon replied calmly from his spot on the couch, remote in hand.

Penny turned toward the television, confused as to why he wasn't scolding everyone for interrupting his show. She was surprised to see that he was currently watching the news. Apparently his show had ended quite some time ago. _Wait a minute,_ she thought to herself. _He usually gets up after his show is over..._

"Why do you guys have your kites?" Leonard asked as he reached for the coffee maker and started a new pot.

"Because they matched our outfits so well," Howard rolled his eyes.

Raj leaned over and whispered into Howard's ear.

"Yes, yes, it brings out the colour of your eyes," Howard reluctantly admitted. Raj beamed.

"You guys want to fly kites at eight in the morning?" Penny asked, incredulous, as she sat down on the couch, blanket askew.

"Kite fighting," Sheldon corrected her, his attention still focused on the television screen.

"Sure, why not?" Howard asked. "It's perfect weather for kite fighting. The wind is strong, the sun is out..."

"Most women go jogging in the park on Saturday morning," Leonard finished, mockingly.

"Well, yeah, I suppose they'll be there too," Howard nodded, trying to look innocent.

"Uh huh," Penny's eyebrow raised.

"And then afterward we can all go out to Souplantation," Howard continued, reaching into his back pocket. "My mother gave me a coupon," he sang and waved it in Sheldon's direction.

"I never understood that name," Sheldon's eyebrow dropped. "Souplantation. You can't grow soup."

"No, but you have have it delivered," Penny turned and winked at him.

Sheldon slowly turned his attention from the television to the girl sitting next to him. "I would rather you not remind me of that particular incident."

"You mean one of your 'human moments'?" She asked sardonically.

"Yes, that," he replied and turned back toward the television.

"Well, I'm up for a little kite fighting," Leonard cut in, taking out two coffee mugs from the cupboard. He sounded a bit excited about the idea. "We haven't done that in a long time."

"Penny, would you like to accompany us this lovely morning?" Howard smoothly sat down on the couch next to her, leering. "I have a spare kite that would match those lovely Hello Kitty shorts you're wearing."

"Quit staring at my legs, Howard," Penny said flatly, standing up and walking into the kitchen, ready for some coffee. She saw Raj throwing his arms out at Howard, an angry look on his face. He then leaned in and whispered into Howard's ear.

"Who cares if it's your kite? Penny's just going to borrow it," Howard argued.

"Seriously, kite fighting?" Penny asked Leonard as he poured her a cup of coffee.

"You don't have to go," Leonard assured her. "Guaranteed it'll be over in three minutes when Howard goes running off to chase some hot girl in the park."

"Well, I don't really have any other plans," Penny trailed off and sighed. "Hey Sheldon, are you going?"

"Does a nitrogen atom have five valence electrons?" He asked mildly, eyes still glued to the screen.

"Oh wait, don't tell me this one," Penny brought her hand to her forehead. "I know this. Um," she trailed off, sneakily glancing at Leonard as he jerked his head in a slight nod. "Yes!" She finally announced, smiling.

"Very good, Penny," Sheldon praised.

Penny beamed and took a sip of her coffee.

"A word of warning," He finally reached for the remote and turned off the television before turning his attention fully to Penny. "I'll be asking you the same question later when Leonard _isn't_ around," he stressed before standing and making his way down the hallway to his room.

Penny's smile disappeared and a frown replaced it. _Damn._ What was the question again?

"Hurry up and get ready," Howard urged them, glancing at his watch. "We're going to miss all the joggers stretching."

"You mean we're going to miss the opportunity to get a good spot in the park?" Leonard tried to correct him, eyebrow raised.

"Yeah, I've given up trying to mask my intentions," Howard shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. "Hurry up, I can hear the spandex calling already."

"Howard, you're disgusting," Penny rolled her eyes and made her way to the front door.

"Don't worry, my cheesecake-scented goddess, I haven't forgotten about you!" Howard called after her as she walked across the hallway. "Remember, it's a bit nippy out, so, you know...wear something NIPpy!"

Penny shot him an unpleasant gesture and smiled as she heard Raj's shocked cough behind her.

…

"You know, I was wrong, kite fighting is fun," Penny's eyebrows lifted over her sunglasses as she took a sip of her frappuccino from a straw.

"You've tied your kite to the arm rest of the bench that you're sitting on," Leonard sighed, focusing his attention on the skies from four feet in front of her.

Penny gave a short laugh. "Yeah, and Howard and Raj still haven't managed to cut it down."

"Penny, you're not taking this at all seriously," Sheldon shook his head as he nimbly maneuvered his kite in the sky.

"You guys gave me a cheap Hello Kitty kite," Penny protested. "How am I supposed to take this seriously?"

"Oh, they're moving into position," Sheldon cut her off. "Once Howard moves to execute their plan, we'll spring the 'Flying Scissors' plan," he said rather excitedly.

Penny smiled to herself. It was endearing to watch him engage in an activity he was obviously enjoying. You know, other than lecturing other people on physics, or reminding them of how intelligent he was.

_Not to mention those long fingers are quite skillful with that kite string..._

Penny flushed and choked on her frappuccino a little bit. She cleared her throat and shook her head. This was not the time to be focusing on stuff like that. Sheldon made it quite clear that he wanted his space.

_And yet he seemed perfectly find with your feet against his leg again this morning._

Penny blinked. She had forgotten about that. A frown suddenly crossed her face. Why hadn't he mention that this morning?

"Damn, rope burn!" Leonard yelped and clutched his finger, kite string slacking.

"Leonard!" Sheldon scolded. "Now is not the time to worry about slight injuries! They've caught onto our plan. We'll have to abort, retreat, and execute another maneuver."

"Like what?" Leonard asked, throwing his arm out. "We've tried everything! I don't understand why Howard hasn't lost interest and gone to run off after some jogger yet!"

"It's nearly nine thirty," Penny reminded him, glancing at her watch. "All the joggers have already finished their laps for today."

"And if _somebody _hadn't wasted our time by insisting we stop by a particular coffee shop to get a frappuccino, we wouldn't be in this predicament, would we?" Sheldon turned around, a slight frown on his face.

"Sheldon, you woke me up at six. Deal with the consequences," She took another sip of her frappuccino. "Oh, look out!" She suddenly yelped and pointed to the sky, where Raj's kite was ducking under Sheldon's string.

Sheldon let out a cry and immediately went to work, maneuvering his kite string and trying to avoid the inevitable cut.

"Shit, what do I do?" Penny put down her drink and jumped up, grabbing her kite string.

"I need a distraction," Sheldon replied. "Somebody cut close to Raj. It'll spook him."

Penny tried to steer her kite in the direction of Raj's kite, but she wasn't exactly skilled at flying kites. "Damnit!" She cried, fingers caught up and twisted in the string.

"I got it!" Leonard called out, his kite flying smoothly into Raj's path. As expected, Raj immediately lost his nerve and swooped back out from under Sheldon's line.

"Yes!" They all shouted triumphantly. Penny stood there with her kite in the air, handle in hand. She gave a few experimental jerks and watched as her kite veered right and left.

"Oh hey, I think I'm getting the hang of this," she said proudly as she continued to experiment. "This is kind of fun."

"Has anyone seen Howard's kite?" Leonard suddenly frowned, scanning the sky. At that, they all stopped what they were doing and looked around.

Penny yelped as Howard's kite suddenly came flying in from behind her and swooped under her string. With one solid tug, her kite came loose from its string and fell to the ground, cut. Penny watched with wide eyes as her kite fell about twenty feet away.

"Where the hell did that little creep come from?" She demanded, annoyed.

"Not the time, Penny," Sheldon replied, already turning around and maneuvering his kite toward Howard. "Leonard, move to the left," he ordered curtly, suddenly very serious.

"Got it," Leonard replied, steering his kite into position.

Penny turned her attention to the sky. Howard's kite was flying directly in the middle of Leonard and Sheldon's kites. He seemed to realize this too late, because he suddenly tried to fly higher right as Sheldon and Leonard both executed a scissor move, cutting Howard's line.

"Yes!" Penny shouted, throwing her arm up in the air excitedly. She laughed. "This is fun!" She turned back around to see Leonard grinning.

"See? It's not that bad, right?" He asked as he quickly turned his kite back around in the opposite direction to look for Raj's kite.

Penny grinned and turned to look at Sheldon. The grin disappeared once she saw that he was staring at her intently. "What?" She asked, blinking. "Do I have whipped cream on my face?" She asked, reaching up to try and wipe whatever it was off of her face.

She watched as Sheldon slowly shook his head, then turned back around, joining Leonard in his search for Raj.

"You should retrieve your kite," Sheldon finally said once his back was turned to her.

"Oh, right," Penny picked up her frappuccino and started walking in the direction of her fallen kite. She frowned.

_What was all that about?_

00000

_A/N: Sorry about the long delay, everybody. I've had a bad case of homesickness this past week and I just haven't been feeling up to writing. :(_

_So here's a short little chapter just to get me back in the swing of writing! I promise the next chapter will be much better._

_Next up: Souplantation and a serious discussion._


	20. Chapter 20

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty_

"Okay, so how does this work?" Penny asked as she grabbed a tray and a plate from a table near the entrance of the restaurant.

"What are you talking about?" Leonard asked, frowning slightly as he chose a tray and plate for himself. "You've been here before, haven't you?"

"No, I meant with Dr. Whack-a-doodle here," Penny jerked a thumb towards Sheldon, who was carefully going through the pile of trays, attempting to find a suitable one.

"Oh that," Leonard laughed. "Well...you'll see."

"Wouldn't want to spoil anything for you," Howard jumped in. "See ya!" He quickly dashed toward the salad bar. Leonard and Raj quickly followed.

Penny frowned to herself. What were they up to?

"Apparently this restaurant operates under the assumption that drying is optional ," Sheldon's voice cut into her musings. She turned around to watch him as he continued to search for a suitable tray.

"What's the big deal?" Penny asked, frowning. "So what if it's a little wet? You can dry it with a napkin."

"Penny," Sheldon turned around and straightened, pinning her with a condescending look. "I think I'm well aware of my options at this point." He turned back around. "It's not the water on the tray that bothers me, it's the millions of potentially infectious microbes that have been stewing in the water while they have sat in the pile."

Penny blinked just as her stomach churned. "Okay, new rule: never, ever mention gross stuff while I'm in a restaurant with you, got it?" She pointed a finger in his direction. "That means no mentioning of bacteria, things that cause infection, or bowel movements."

"I fail to see how perfectly natural bowel movements are constituted as 'gross'," Sheldon muttered before finally selecting a rather dry tray from the bottom of the pile. He sighed. "I suppose this will have to do."

"Oh, thank god," Penny sighed and turned toward the salad bar.

"Now I need a plate..."

…

"Sheldon, I'm sure it's fine," Penny assured him as she lifted her tray and began walking to an empty booth.

"The woman wasn't wearing _gloves_, Penny," Sheldon came up next to her, leaning down as he protested. "In what universe is that 'fine'?"

"Um, ones where cashiers aren't required to wear gloves?" Penny countered, eyebrows lifting. "Such as this one?"

Sheldon huffed. "The exchange of potentially-,"

"Sheldon," Penny warned him and stopped walking.

"This is a booth," Sheldon looked down at the table in front of them. "I don't eat in booths here, Penny."

"I'm not stopping here to...oh forget it," Penny sighed and started walking again, this time to the table that Leonard, Howard, and Raj were already sitting at. She glared at them as soon as it became apparent that they were laughing at her situation.

"Very funny," Penny dropped her tray on the table, taking a seat a the end of the table. "Now I know why you guys ran through the salad bar," she muttered to herself and sat down, watching as Sheldon carefully sat his tray down and folded himself into the empty seat across from her. "Oh, and thanks for that lovely coupon you forgot to share with us," Penny glared at Howard before turning back to Sheldon. "You're keeping track of how much I owe you, right?"

"Twenty-four dollars and fifteen cents," Sheldon supplied automatically as he stretched a napkin across his lap. "That doesn't include the frappuccino from this morning that you insisted I pay for."

"Good, because you deserved to pay for that one," Penny muttered as she took a bite of her pasta salad.

"The coupon was actually expired," Howard interjected. "I really need to get my mother's eyes checked. With any luck, they'll tell me she's blind and needs to be put down," he muttered before taking another bite of his salad.

"Charming," Penny rolled her eyes.

"Hey, that huge house will be pretty lonely once she's gone, if you catch my drift," Howard leaned closer from his position on the other side of the table, eyebrows waggling suggestively.

Penny responded with a blank stare and a raised eyebrow that suggested he was treading on thin ice. Howard quickly focused his attention on his plate. Penny sighed, then turned her head back to her plate, but not before noticing that Sheldon was also staring at Howard with a similar expression on his face. Penny frowned, then checked to make sure that Sheldon had all five of his napkins. Yep, they were all there. Why was he looking at Howard?

Penny shook her head, and took a bite of her salad. A silence fell over the group as they began eating. After a minute or two, Sheldon finally turned his attention back to his plate and carefully speared a cucumber with his fork. Examining it from both sides, he then brought it to his mouth, the cucumber apparently passing inspection.

After about five minutes, one by one the others left the table in search of food from the buffet, leaving Penny and Sheldon alone with their salads. In between bites, Penny glanced up at the man across from her and was surprised to see he was looking at her, fork still in hand. Penny quickly swallowed her lettuce and took a sip of water.

"What's up?" She asked, putting down her fork.

Sheldon also placed down his fork and carefully took the time to wipe his mouth with a napkin before speaking. "Penny, it has come to my attention that the time we have spent together has caused an unusual disturbance in our friendship paradigm," he explained, as technical as ever.

"Okay," Penny blinked. "So what does that mean?"

Sheldon sighed. "A _disturbance _is-,"

"Sheldon," Penny snapped. "I understand the meaning of the word. I just want to know what your point is."

"It would appear that even though my intelligence denotes further advancement in the evolutionary scale, the _Homo novus_ is still hindered by the biological weaknesses of the _Homo sapiens _species," he replied, then paused heavily.

Penny blinked once more, then felt her eyebrows raise. Was she supposed to add something here?

"Um, okay," she supplied once it was apparent that he wasn't going to continue without some kind of response from her.

"Penny, as you are aware, social behaviours and constructs elude me at times-,"

"_Most _of the time," Penny muttered to herself.

"And I fail to see the gain of romantic relationships," he paused. "After all, most of what I have been exposed to has been from living with Leonard, living across the hall from you, and simply being in the same room as Wolowitz."

"Yeah, and?" Penny pressed on. Where the heck was he going with all of this? Shaking her head slightly, she went back to slowly eating the last of her salad.

"I have been having some confusing thought processes as of late, and I've done some research on the matter," Sheldon continued. "And after conferring with several sociological and anthropological sources, I believe we are, in fact, dating."

Penny choked on her lettuce, reaching for her water and gulping down half the glass before coughing loudly. Several other restaurant patrons looked over to see what the noise was all about.

Sheldon remained calm and watched as she kept coughing and clearing her throat from across the table. "Have you successfully removed the lettuce from the entrance to your larynx?"

Penny coughed one last time and glared at him. "Continue," she managed to get out, her voice a bit hoarse from all the coughing.

"Oh, good," Sheldon re-situated his position in his chair. "Although I'm familiar in the necessary steps taken in application of the Heimlich maneuver, I'm afraid my knowledge is only of a theoretical nature."

Penny took another long drink of water, wishing desperately it was some sort of alcohol.

"As I was saying," Sheldon continued, placing his arms delicately on the table. "My research into the matter has concluded that we are, in fact, dating."

"How do you figure?" Penny frowned. "And since when do you care, anyway? I thought you wanted space from me."

"The research on courtship rituals, trivial as they may be, are quite clear on several matters, the most important of all ancient rituals was the presenting of food to the female on behalf of the male," Sheldon explained. "I have paid for several of your meals," he continued on.

"So?" Penny asked. "That doesn't mean we're dating."

"While I agree that the social sciences are complete hokum, Leonard has pointed out to me that there have been several...physical and physiological changes that have unknowingly occurred in the past several weeks," Sheldon continued.

"What does that mean?" Penny asked in a rather quiet voice, still frowning. What was he trying to say? That he actually liked her? That was impossible, this was Sheldon. There was no way that he would actually admit to having regular human emotions or needs. The man actually referred to himself as a _Homo novus, _for crying out loud.

"I believe it means," Sheldon replied, then paused for several minutes, seemingly struggling to actually say the words. "That...I enjoy your presence."

Penny sat there for a moment, then slowly smiled. "Aw, sweetie, I enjoy hanging out with you, too." She smiled again and reached across the table for one of his hands. Without thinking much about it, she simply placed her hand lightly on top of his. Feeling the warmth of his skin under her palm, Penny smiled and ran her thumb against the top of his hand. Looking up, she laughed to herself as she watched Sheldon's eyes fixate on their hands with an expression of mild panic on his face. His eyebrow began twitching like mad.

"You coughed into that hand," he finally managed to say after a minute of silence.

"Yep," Penny grinned.

"Your hand is on my hand."

"Uh-huh."

"Penny, you're touching my hand."

"Yep, and enjoying it, too," she grinned. "They're surprisingly soft," she said as she stretched her other arm out toward his other hand. She laughed as Sheldon immediately pulled both hands away from the table and frantically dug into his pocket. He pulled out an antibacterial gel and immediately opened it to rub it all over his hands.

"What's going on?" Leonard's voice came from behind her.

Penny turned to see that the three boys had come back from the buffet, each with full plates of food as they sat back down.

"Oh, nothing," she smiled. "Dr. Whack-a-doodle is just being crazy again," she gave Sheldon a wink and felt a slight thrill as he froze in his seat, eyes slightly widened. She stood up and sauntered over to the buffet, chuckling lightly. Not only was the ball back in her court, but the rules had now changed into something a bit more familiar to her.

Things just got interesting with Sheldon.

00000

_A/N: Yay, an update! :) Actual __progress__ here on Sheldon's part. Thanks so much for reviewing, guys. Everytime I see a review in my inbox, it lets me know that people are reading and want the story to continue. Thanks everybody!_


	21. Chapter 21

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty-One_

"Penny, have you misplaced your orientation packet?" Sheldon stood in front of the couch, blocking her view of the television.

"You mean that huge binder you gave me?" She asked, popping a slice of orange in her mouth. "It's in my apartment. Why?"

"Am I to assume that the language used was far beyond your reading capabilities?" He asked, eyebrow raised.

Penny froze before peeling the next slice off and looked up to glare at Sheldon. "Am I to assume that you're being a giant ass this morning?" She asked in a sweet tone that did not reflect her attitude.

Other than an eyebrow twitch, Sheldon seemed to ignore the comment. "You used the bathroom this morning," he stated.

"At 8:25, my scheduled time," Penny replied, going back to peeling her orange.

"You changed the toilet paper roll."

"Oh god, is that what this is all about?" Penny threw her arms down on the couch and sighed. "What, did I replace it with the wrong _kind _of toilet paper?"

"No, you faced the roll the incorrect way."

Penny stared at him with a look of disbelief on her face before turning to the man sitting in the lounger. "Is he for real?"

Leonard warily dragged his gaze from the television to meet Penny's gaze. "What do you think?" He asked in a tired voice.

"Oh my god," Penny huffed and stood up, deftly maneuvering around Sheldon and making her way into the bathroom. Walking straight for the toilet paper holder, she removed the roll and faced it so that the end of the roll was on top and hanging down toward the floor. "There, happy now?" She grumbled as she set the roll in place.

"I'm not unhappy."

Penny jumped as Sheldon's voice came from right behind her. She turned around and looked up at him, hands on hips. "Anything else?" She asked wearily, eyebrow raised.

"Not at the moment, but at this rate, I'm sure there will be," Sheldon crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at her with a superior look on his face.

Oh, but she wanted to rip that look off his face some days. Today, in particular, was no exception as he had once again set the alarm on the coffee table for seven in the morning and insisted that it was a reasonable hour to wake up at after she had torn into him for ten minutes. She knew it would be an easy thing to do. She could just move in closer or pretend like she was going to touch his face.

Yeah, surely the thought of running her sticky, orange peel-covered fingers all over his clean face would be enough to wipe that look off his face. Penny smirked slightly and took a step closer until they were toe-to-toe. When he didn't back away, Penny was surprised. He merely continued to stare at her. If anything, his eyebrow notched a bit higher at her sudden move.

_Oh, a challenge, _Penny thought to herself with a grin. Urged on by this thought, she immediately reached up with one hand and placed her palm flat on his cheek, reveling in the warmth that his skin radiated. She watched as his eyes widened in surprise, but made no other movement. He seemed to be frozen in his spot, arms still crossed over his chest.

Smiling slightly at the awkwardness that she had created, Penny allowed her thumb to brush lightly against his cheek. She was surprised at how soft his skin was.

"Penny," Sheldon finally found his voice, although it was a bit strained. "I'm...not entirely certain I'm comfortable with your proximity." A nervous tic developed just below his eye. Penny ran her finger over the area and watched as the tremors increased into full spasms around his eye.

"Then I guess you're not going to appreciate this," Penny whispered as she gave in to temptation. She reached for his other cheek with her other hand and pulled his head down easily. Leaning in, she allowed her lips to touch the end of his nose briefly before letting go and taking a step back.

She smiled warmly as Sheldon froze in that position, still bent over and staring at the floor while his eyebrow jerked up and down involuntarily.

"Sorry about the toilet paper," she said in earnest before winking at him and stepping around him. As she left the bathroom, she could still feel the tip of his nose on her lips. Rubbing them together slightly, she sighed. She was in big trouble once he finally snapped out of his self-induced coma. She couldn't figure out why she did it. She had only planned on stroking his cheek, just enough to wipe that self-important look off his face. She certainly hadn't expected to kiss him...and on the nose, of all places! Considering it was probably the last time Sheldon would let her within two feet of him, she should have at least given in and gone for that soft cheek...or his lips. Penny sighed once more and she reached the couch and sat down. Sheldon's confession yesterday had been a huge deal, and she recognized that. For Sheldon to admit that he wanted her around, well, it felt like a bigger deal to her than any love confession from her previous boyfriends. Still, there was no way he'd be cool with her just...

"Leonard, you'll be happy to hear that the toilet paper debacle has been rectified," Sheldon announced from the hallway, as calm as ever.

"Oh thank god," Leonard announced, bringing his head up. "I was _really _starting to worry for a minute there."

"There's no need for sarcasm, I'm well aware of your nonchalant attitude regarding the toilet paper clause of the roommate agreement," Sheldon remarked as he took a seat next to Penny on the couch. "Which is, by the way, something to be brought up at the next roommate meeting, so be prepared for a full inquiry."

Leonard sighed and allowed his head to fall in his hand. He then turned and went back to watching the television.

Penny looked up at the man sitting next to her. He gave no indication that he noticed her in the slightest as he faced the television and retrieved the remote from the coffee table.

Penny smiled to herself as he turned down the volume slightly. Well...maybe this would work after all. She leaned her head on his shoulder and joined them in watching their science fiction show. She felt a small gloat of victory as she felt the tension slowly ease from Sheldon's shoulder after about five minutes. Today was going to be a good day.

…

"No, no, no."

"Sheldon!" Penny snapped as she threw yet another outfit back into the 'no' pile. "I'm perfectly capable of dressing myself for my first day tomorrow. I don't need your help," she insisted as she picked out another skirt and held it up to her body.

"Just like you're capable of putting laundry into the laundry basket?" Sheldon sat on the edge of Penny's bed, his arms crossed and eyebrow raised at the large pile of dirty laundry sitting in the corner of the room. Sitting next to the pile was a rather large, unused laundry basket. Sheldon bit the inside of his cheek and felt his foot start tapping anxiously. He wanted to walk over there and sort the laundry himself. The idea of the whites mixed in with the other colours was starting to wreak havoc on his mind.

"Okay, how about this one?" Penny held up yet another outfit for him to see. Sheldon turned and examined the black skirt with the leopard print blouse.

"I would assume you reserve that outfit for excursions to the local zoo?" He asked, still running his eyes up and down the outfit.

Penny made a disgusted noise. "Fine, then I give up!" She threw the clothes down on the bed next to him. "Here, you pick it out. You're obviously not going to leave until you're happy with what I'm wearing," she waved a hand in the direction of her closet. "Geez, it's like you think I'm going to embarrass you or something."

Sheldon made his way over to the closet, stepping over several pairs of shoes to get there. "I already know that you're going to embarrass me, I'm just trying to soften the blow," he replied easily, sorting through the closet with one finger. "I see no organizational system whatsoever," he said to himself, looking through the rack. Shirts were mixed with pants. Skirts were mixed with nightgowns...

Sheldon felt his finger brush the material of the nightgown in particular and froze slightly. Blinking down at the garment, he allowed his finger to rub against the material one more time before forcing himself to move on through the closet. He wasn't sure why he felt the need to stop and admire the garment, but he gave in nonetheless. It seemed to be something he was doing a lot more of in the past couple of weeks.

"Here," he said, finally locating a plain white blouse. He handed the hangar to her. "With that black skirt," he pointed to the conservative knee-length skirt that had been thrown across the bed a few moments earlier.

"This?" Penny took the hangar and wrinkled her nose. "It's so...boring." She put the blouse down on the bed next to the skirt. "How come you guys get to wear t-shirts to work and I have to get dressed up?"

"Because I am a well-known theoretical physicist with a masters degree and two doctorates. I am also on the precipice of confirming _string theory_, thereby changing the view of the universe as we know it," Sheldon paused and stared at her for a moment. "You eat _string_ cheese."

Penny pointed a finger in his face. "Don't you mock the cheese," she warned him before standing up and staring down at her new outfit. She sighed. "Okay fine, I'll go all dressed up. I hope Dr. Muller lets me dress down every once in a while," she said, picking up her outfit and rearranging it. "This is just too boring."

"It's professional," Sheldon replied. "Now if we are finished here, I would like to leave this swirling vortex of entropy and return to my apartment. As you know, it's Wii bowling night."

"Hey, it's not that bad!" Penny frowned and took a look around her room. "Well...okay, it could stand a little cleaning..."

"A little?" Sheldon turned around and raised an eyebrow.

Penny made an unpleasant face at him and began making her way toward him. "Not everybody's a neat freak like you," she said as she reached up and pat his cheek. She then moved around him and made her way out of the room.

Sheldon stood where he was a felt the ghost of her touch still on his right cheek. A unfamiliar feeling made its way through his body, but he couldn't pinpoint the feeling. Was he uncomfortable? Was he annoyed?

He continued to think about it as he turned and made his way out of the room. He followed Penny out the front door and into the hallway. As he turned to shut the door behind him, his arm brushed against Penny's. Shifting his head to the side, he felt that unfamiliar feeling yet again. Shaking his head, he put his thoughts aside and followed Penny back into his apartment.

"What took you guys so long?" Leonard asked once they had entered the apartment. He had already changed into his team shirt.

"Sheldon," Penny replied simply, walking over to her spot on the couch. Leonard nodded.

"What were you guys doing over there, anyway?" Howard asked, frowning as he opened a bottle of water.

"Sheldon was helping me pick out clothes for tomorrow," Penny replied, watching as Sheldon put on his button-up team shirt over top of his t-shirt.

Raj suddenly leaned in to whisper something to Howard. They both sniggered.

"What?" Penny asked, frowning.

"Well, Raj was just wondering if 'picking out clothes' is a new euphemism for, well, something else," Howard waggled his eyebrow.

Penny stared at the tiny man from across the coffee table, still frowning and mouth opened slightly. "What?" She asked angrily.

"They believe you and I were engaging in coitus, Penny," Sheldon cut in, his attention focused on attaching his wrist brace.

"Yeah, I got that Sheldon," Penny snapped, face turning slightly red at the suggestion. "I just don't see how it's any of their business, or even why they think that you and I would _ever_ ," she faltered slightly, the thought of sex with Sheldon suddenly at the forefront of her mind. Yeah, she could just see it now. One tiny kiss on the lips and he would suddenly go off on a fifteen minute lecture about how unsanitary it was and how they were exchanging thousands of different bacteria in the process.

But oh...if he could turn off that genius mind for several wonderful hours...

Penny bit the inside of her lip as she imagined running her fingers over his chest once more...but in a slightly different setting and certainly without the VapoRub.

"Well, I would assume that Wolowitz and Koothrappali have noticed the increase in-,"

"Yeah, yeah, got it. Moving on," Penny cut him off. "Isn't it time for the game to start?"

"Oh, right," Leonard stood up and turned on the console. "Are you playing with us, Penny?"

"No, I'm good," Penny replied, crossing her arms and legs. "I'll just watch you guys."

"Or you could go pick up a pizza," Howard shrugged and looked at her expectantly.

At the mention of pizza, the other three sets of eyes immediately turned toward her.

"Ugh, fine," Penny stood up and straightened her shirt. "I'll go get dinner." She made her way to the door, where her purse and keys were sitting in the bowl next to it. "It's not like I'm going to miss anything anyway," she grumbled to herself as she opened the door.

"I'm feeling pretty good tonight," Howard's voice came from behind her. "I think tonight's going to be the night I break my record 60 points."

Penny rolled her eyes and closed the door behind her.

00000

_Author's Note: Woohoo! A longer chapter. ;) I wish I could bring my laptop to work with me...then I could finish these updates a lot faster. Oh well. _

_I'm hoping Sheldon and Penny get a bit more physical in the chapters to come...it looks like it's headed that way! :)_


	22. Chapter 22

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty-Two_

Penny stood back and admired her handiwork. The desk was completely cleared of papers, books, and other general clutter. She glanced at the clock on the wall.

_Not bad, _she thought to herself. It had only taken her three hours to wade through the mess and organize everything. She smiled and ran her hand over the top of the desk. She was proud of herself. When Dr. Muller had explained what her first task would be, Penny had blanched. She hardly ever cleaned her own place, let alone an office she had spent ten minutes in.

_You know, _she thought, _this doesn't look half-bad. _Maybe she should try to clear off her kitchen counter when she got home.

Penny paused, then snorted to herself. Yeah right. Who was she kidding? Besides, nobody would pay her to clean at home.

"Oh my!"

Penny turned around to see Dr. Muller standing in her office doorway, glasses askew and papers clutched to her chest. "I don't think I've seen the top of that desk in months!" She stared at it in amazement. "You've done a splendid job. Where are all the papers?" She asked suddenly, looking around the room.

"All in here," Penny pat the top of the filing cabinet proudly. "I wasn't sure I'd be able to tell what went where, but all of the papers were colour-coded with these little tabs," Penny replied, holding up a blue tab that she had found on the floor earlier.

"Oh yes," Dr. Muller sighed. "My last assistant was _very _meticulous about the filing system. Not that it matters, of course. As long as you know where everything is, then we should be fine," she shifted her papers around. "Now, I have a class to teach. Since it's nearly noon, would you like to take your lunch break now?"

"Uh, sure," Penny blinked. Having a lunch hour was going to take some getting used to. At the Cheesecake Factory, she would sneak a couple of bites of her lunch in between customers.

"I should be back by one-thirty," Dr. Muller said as she walked to the door. "Don't forget to lock up before you leave and put the sign up saying you'll be back," she called out as she shut the door behind her.

Penny frowned. Lock up? With what keys? She looked around the room. Dr. Muller never gave her any keys. She ran to the door and searched up and down the hallway, but the tiny professor was gone.

"Damn." Penny went back inside the office and shut the door. Now what? She sighed and looked at the clock. She couldn't just leave the door unlocked while she was gone. Her stomach growled. Then again, she couldn't exactly wait an hour and a half before eating, either. She went over to the desk and sat down in the chair to consider her options.

Delivery? Too expensive.

Leave? Risk getting fired.

Stay? Be miserable for an hour and a half.

Penny suddenly jerked forward as a sudden thought occurred to her. Grabbing the phone off the desk, she quickly looked up a number in the directory and dialed it.

"Hello?

"Leonard?"

"Penny? Where are you calling me from?"

"From the Humanities office. My cell phone was cut off, remember?"

"Oh right. What's up?"

"Listen, I'm stuck in this office until one-thirty and I'm starving. Would you mind-,"

A screeching noise came thought the other line, interrupting her.

"Uh oh, contamination alert here in the radiation lab! Gotta go, bye!" Leonard's panicked voice came through the line before a sudden click ended the call.

Penny stared at the phone, an incredulous look on her face. She finally found her voice after several minutes. "I called your _office_, you geeky bastard!" She yelled into the phone before hanging it up. What the hell? She huffed and picked up the phone again, this time dialing a different extension.

...

Howard barely glanced at the caller ID on his phone before picking it up. "Hello?" He answered smoothly, still tinkering away with a metal object in his hand.

"Howard?"

He immediately straightened and dropped the mechanism back on the table. "Why, hello there Penny," he replied in his best sultry voice. "And how are you this lovely afternoon? You know, you should really stop by my little engineering lab here. I might even let you touch my rather large-,"

"Hang up right now," Leonard burst through the door, out of breath and doubling over.

"I'd choose that next word very carefully, Howard," Penny's voice brought his attention back to the conversation.

"Well, I was going to say 'soldering iron', but hey, if you're up for a little-,"

"Hang up!" Leonard whispered furiously and made a cutting gesture across his throat.

Howard pulled a face that clearly asked 'What the hell is your problem?' before covering the mouthpiece with his hand. "Can I help you? As you can see, I'm kind of busy here," Howard's eyebrows shot up and made a gesture toward the phone.

"Penny's about to ask you to get her lunch," Leonard quickly explained.

"So?" Howard asked as if Leonard has lost his mind.

"Four words: Bill's Hot Dog Shack," Leonard replied simply.

Howard's face fell blank for a moment. He then removed his hand from the mouthpiece. "Sorry Penny, gotta go," he quickly hung up the phone, ignoring Penny's cries of frustration echoing in the ear piece.

"The Hot Dog Shack," Howard's voice whispered reverently. "It's been nearly four years."

"I know, but we need to catch Raj if we're going to pull this one off!" Leonard turned on his heel and ran back out into the hallway, Howard hot on his heels.

"Oh man, could this have worked out any better?" Howard asked as they ran. "An opportunity for a Sheldon-free lunch _and _a new opportunity to be a bad Jew on a Monday!"

"I hope they're as good as I remember," Leonard replied wistfully as he ran down the hallway. "Man, if I had a time machine, I'd go back to that day when Sheldon saw them drop a packet of ketchup on the floor and put it back in the condiment basket."

"Or that time when the lady behind the counter coughed into her hands and didn't wash them before grabbing our order," Howard added.

Leonard came to a full stop in the middle of the hallway. "Actually, Sheldon might have the right idea about that place," he frowned, turning to Howard.

"Three words, my friend," Howard leaned in and grabbed his shoulders. "Onion Ring Tower."

"Then again, who doesn't mind a few microbes here and there?" Leonard shrugged, arms out. "Quick!" They both sprang into action, running to Raj's office and bursting through the door. Quickly assessing the situation, Howard grabbed the cough syrup out of Raj's hand just as Leonard grabbed the phone and hung it up.

"Dude, what's going on?" Raj asked, bewildered.

"We'll explain in the car. Come on, we're going to lunch," they said as they guided him out of his chair.

...

"What the-," Penny frowned as she felt her annoyance rise up. She slammed the phone down. What the hell was everyone's problem? Sighing, and mentally preparing herself, she picked up the one one more time and dialed the last person she knew at the university.

…

"_Oh ho_, you thought you could hide from me?" Sheldon muttered as he finally located his missing neutrino. "I applaud you for eluding me for the past two hours," he continued distractedly, still staring at his board.

As his eyes ran over the diagram once more, he felt his eyebrow twitch in surprise as the phone rang. Capping his marker, he walked over to his desk and took a seat. Smoothing out his shirt, he waited until the second ring had finished before picking it up. "Hello?"

"Sheldon, thank god, listen, I need-,"

"Penny?" Sheldon felt his eyebrows tilt into a frown. "This is my work phone."

"Yeah, I know. I dialed it, remember?" Her sarcastic reply came through in a tinny voice.

Sheldon reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Staring at the bright screen, he frowned again.

"Penny, my cell phone is functioning correctly. Why are you calling me on my work phone?"

"Of for Gods' sakes!" Sheldon heard a click before the line went dead. He hung up his work phone just as his cell phone rang.

Waiting calmly until the second ring, he finally deigned to pick it up. "Hello?" He answered.

"There, happy now?" Penny replied abruptly.

"I'm not unhappy," Sheldon replied, then frowned. Had there been a female echo to that comment from the other line?

"Yeah yeah, listen," Penny continued. "I'm stuck in the Humanities department office until Dr. Muller gets back and I'm starving. When are you leaving for lunch?"

Sheldon blinked, then glanced at his watch. "In exactly twenty-three minutes," he replied.

"Okay, listen-,"

"Twenty-two," Sheldon updated just as the second hand finished its rotation.

There was a pause from the other line.

"Got it Sheldon," Penny replied dryly, and Sheldon put his wrist back down. "Would you mind leaving a little bit early and getting me some lunch from the cafeteria while you're down there? You could just swing it back up here before you head back to your office."

"I don't eat in my office, Penny," Sheldon replied.

"Yeah, _whatever_," Penny replied, all traces of patience gone. "Can you just bring me some freaking lunch?"

"I would love to, Penny, but I'm afraid I can't do that," Sheldon shook his head lightly even though she wouldn't be able to see it through the phone.

"Why the hell not?" Penny's high pitched question reverberated in his ear.

Frowning, and lifting the phone off his ear, he continued. "Today is Monday, which means that the cafeteria is serving ham and cheese sandwiches and a side of fruit salad. Koothrappali will consume his usual order of a bacon cheeseburger from the grill, Wolowitz will partake in his chicken noodle soup with a side salad, and Leonard will have the sandwich but insist on asking for a side of pudding instead of the recommended fruit salad," Sheldon explained, and then paused. Surely Penny would understand that any deviation to the day's schedule would be out of the question.

There was a short pause. "And?" Her voice came through the line, confused.

Sheldon sighed. Overestimated, yet again. "And, given the time needed to order, allowing for extra time for the various food substitutions, by the time we will have reached our table, we will have exactly eighteen minutes to consume our meals and exchange in pleasant, albeit unnecessary, conversation. There's simply no time for me to add a fifth meal request to our usual order, let alone enough time to allow for delivery."

"Sheldon," Penny's whine came through the phone. "Please? I'm really hungry here!"

"Penny, you should have heeded my advice about bringing a sack lunch on the first day of work," Sheldon replied, eyebrow raised.

"Who the hell brings a sack lunch to work anymore?" Penny scoffed. "I don't want to look like a loser on my first day."

"Yes, well, I'm very busy," Sheldon continued. "Goodbye," he said just as he hung up the phone. Putting it back in his pocket, he had barely stood up out of his chair before his cell phone rang yet again.

Frowning, he sat back down and took out his phone. Glancing at the caller ID, he frowned again. "Hello?" Sheldon picked up, confused as to why Leonard was calling him eighteen minutes before their lunch.

"Hey buddy," Leonard's voice came through the line.

"Buddy?" Sheldon asked in a high-pitched voice, confused.

"Hey, sorry, but we're not going to make it to lunch today."

"What?" Sheldon half-stood out of his chair, a panic slowly rising in his throat. "Why not? It's Monday."

"Yeah, um, there was an emergency departmental meeting," Leonard replied quickly. "You didn't receive the email because it's only for experimental physicists and astrophysicists."

"What about Wolowitz?" Sheldon's eyebrows furrowed deeper.

"Uh, he had to come too because..." there was a pause. "They needed an engineer."

"For what?" Sheldon asked, flabbergasted.

"For...a problem with the water dispenser," Leonard continued, his voice a bit higher than usual. "Listen, we're not going to be there for lunch, but I hear Penny might be alone for her lunch hour, so you should go eat with her. Have fun, bye!"

_Click. _Sheldon jerked the phone away from his ear and stared at his phone. Mild panic once again rose up in his throat at the thought of the upcoming change in his weekly routine. Was he to sit by himself? What if he needed to use the restroom? Who would watch his food?

Slowly putting his phone away in his pocket, he stood back up and walked back to his white board.

Staring at his board, he allowed the formula to enter his mind, he tried to conceive of every possible alternative outcome. No, that wouldn't allow for the time parameter. No, that just wasn't feasible.

No, that wouldn't allow for an acceptable bowel movement at four o' clock.

"Drat," Sheldon finally spoke aloud.

…

Penny heard a noise from the door, and she lifted her head from her arms. Blinking blearily, she was shocked to see Sheldon standing in the doorway with two trays in his hand.

"Sheldon?" She asked, frowning. "You actually...got me some lunch?"

"So it would appear," he replied, corners of his mouth turned downward. Without saying another word, he simple stepped forward and looked down at the desk. "Is it clean?" He asked skeptically, eying it carefully.

"Cleaned it with Pledge," Penny held up the can from under her desk. "Twice."

Wrinkling his nose, but still accepting the answer, Sheldon placed both trays down on the table. "I shall require a more suitable seat," he said, looking at the small plastic chair that sat beside him.

"Oh, here," Penny stood up out of her executive chair. "Take this one. I'll use the plastic one," she said, walking around the desk and pulling up the chair so that they would be sitting opposite one another.

Sheldon eyed her chair carefully before walking around to it and giving the seat a cautious wipe.

"Lysol's under the desk," Penny said distractedly as she opened the styrofoam box nearest to her. Ham and cheese sandwich with a side of fruit salad.

Sheldon reached for the spray and applied a thin layer of the disinfectant to the chair with an expert flourish of his wrist. Seemingly satisfied, he then took a seat and adjusted the chair closer to the desk.

"Which one is mine?" Penny asked, not wanting to touch any of his food.

"This one," Sheldon reached for the box that she hadn't opened yet.

"What did you get?" She asked softly, trying to initiate conversation. She could sense a bit of awkwardness starting to settle over the both of them in the quiet office.

"Cheese and ham sandwich with a side of fruit salad," he answered simply, opening the box and reaching for his six napkins. Penny watched as he arranged them in a particular order on his tray.

"So it's the same as this one?" She asked, pointing to her own box before opening it.

"No, that would be a ham and cheese sandwich with a side of fruit salad," Sheldon replied, not taking his eyes away from the task at hand. Once all of his napkins were in the proper order, he then reached for his sandwich and took a bite.

"Oh," Penny nodded, opening her container of fruit salad. She then paused and frowned. "Wow, it's sad that I totally understood that."

"Understood what?" Sheldon's head raised slightly, a mild look of curiosity on his face.

"Nothing," Penny shook her head and took a bite of her sandwich. Her stomach wept. "This tastes amazing," she commented as she took yet another bite.

"My meemaw makes better," Sheldon replied distractedly, reaching for his fork and examining the fruit salad carefully, picking out an acceptable grape.

"Really?" Penny's eyebrows shot up. She hadn't heard Sheldon talk about his grandmother in quite some time. "Well, I guess I'll just have to invite myself over to your grandmother's for some sandwiches sometime," she teased, taking another bite.

Sheldon didn't reply. Instead, he seemed to ignore that last comment and picked out an acceptable piece of melon with his fork. She did, however, catch the tiny twitch of the muscle around his eye.

A short silence fell over them as they continued to eat. Penny was surprised to feel that it wasn't exactly uncomfortable, or even awkward. It was just...quiet.

"Sheldon, thank you so much for getting me some lunch," she finally spoke up. "I really appreciate it."

"There was no other acceptable outcome to the situation," Sheldon replied as he took another bite of his sandwich.

Penny shook her head lightly. "Well, anyway, thank you." She took the last bite of her sandwich and took a sip of her water.

The silence fell over them once again as Penny began to consume her fruit salad. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sheldon glancing around the office curiously as he ate.

"It's a pretty nice office, isn't it?" Penny tried to strike up another conversation. She looked around and admired the bookcases full of classical texts. She had no idea who the authors were, but they looked great. Just looking at it made her feel more intelligent.

"For a Humanities department, I suppose," Sheldon took another bite of his sandwich, finishing it.

Penny smiled and watched as he began to inspect the rest of the fruit in his fruit salad. "I cleaned this whole office, you know?"

He didn't respond.

"Organized everything into a filing cabinet, put the books into alphabetical order by author's name, took out some paper towels and cleaned every surface in this room," Penny listed off her accomplishments and smiled. "Pretty amazing, huh?"

Sheldon responded by picking out another grape and bringing it to his mouth.

"Yep, pretty amazing," Penny nodded her head slowly, still smiling.

Finishing off his fruit salad, Sheldon wiped his mouth with his napkin and organized everything on his tray. He then reached across and did the same for Penny.

"Perhaps you can use your new-found skill to clean your apartment this evening?" Sheldon finally spoke as he gathered up his unused napkins and placed them carefully on the tray.

Penny smiled. She recognized it as a backhanded, Sheldon compliment.

"Maybe," she allowed. "You going back to your office?"

"It's where I work, Penny," Sheldon stood up from his seat and gathered the trays. "I have exactly four minutes and twelve seconds to return these to the cafeteria and make it back to my office."

"Thanks for lunch, Sheldon," Penny stood up and opened the door for him. "You're keeping track of how much I owe you, right?"

"Thirty-seven dollars and twenty cents," Sheldon supplied as he walked out the door.

"Perfect. I'll see you at the end of the day!" She called out to him before he rounded the corner.

She could have swore she heard a sigh, but she ignored it and smiled.

She had lunch with Sheldon. At work. In her office. At her desk.

"Excellent first day," She said to herself, hands on her hips.

"Indeed, dear."

Penny gasped and jumped as Dr. Muller maneuvered around her and headed straight for her office.

Holding a hand over her heart, she shook her head and followed her, eager to get back to work.

…

_A/N: Okay, first off, I want to apologize for not updating in a month. x_x Sooo sorry about that. I got caught up with working 11-hour days, one of my students began stalking me (yeah, long story), I got homesick...yet again, and some other stuff that I'm not going to complain about here._

_Yeah, it hasn't been a pleasant month. Good news though, I've finished my contract and the semester is over! Woohoo! I fly back home on Sunday, so there will be more regular updates! YAY!_

_Sorry if this chapter wasn't exactly the best one I've ever written...I'm slowly trying to ease back into it. I tried watching several episodes of TBBT last night to try and make it easier. I think I'm going to have to re-watch seasons two and three before I write the next chapter. I need my concept of Sheldon and Penny fresh in my mind again._

_Anyway...REVIEWS ARE TINY HUGS! I like tiny hugs. They encourage me to write. ^^_


	23. Chapter 23

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty-Three_

Sheldon felt a mild brush of contact against his cheek. His nose wrinkled automatically in response. It was dark in his room and even though his eyes were open, he couldn't see a thing. Writing it off as a draft, he mentally reminded himself to examine the window himself in the morning. He settled back into his covers and closed his eyes again.

Only this time, the brush trailed up his chest. Jumping slightly, he opened his eyes again. There was still nothing but darkness. Reaching up and touching his plaid-covered chest, he was reassured that nothing was there. Shaking his head, he again settled back in.

Closing his eyes once more, he felt the beginnings of sleep creep into his mind, but continued to elude him for several minutes.

He nearly jumped out of bed when the feeling of contact returned on his cheek. It was light and...hot? Sheldon's heart began to panic as he mentally prepared a list of possible medical conditions that may have befallen him. Night terrors, sleep paralysis...

Hand?

Sheldon swallowed. No, that was definitely the feeling of five fingers lightly brushing his chest. Frozen, he kept his eyes screwed shut.

_Danger, danger!_ His mind screamed.

His body lay prone on the bed, fingers grasping the edge of the bedspread tightly.

The fingers made their way up his chest, lightly circling his chest. Counterclockwise.

Sheldon swallowed again.

Hot air poured over his cheek and he felt a presence hovering over his face. Gritting his teeth, his mind was going a mile a minute, calculating the weight that was slowly sinking onto his body. Nails lightly scratched his side as the hand dipped down to his navel and came back up to his chest.

Female.

He felt lips trail their way from his cheek down in an arc toward his own lips. He licked them without thinking about it. A female voice chuckled above his head.

Sheldon's eyes flew open in surprise.

"Pe-," he manged to get out before a hand covered his lips with a small noise of censure.

"Shh," Penny's voice came from out of the darkness. "You'll wake up Leonard."

Sheldon's eyebrows shot up in confusion. Penny was in his room. _Penny_ was in _his_ room.

Nobody was supposed to be in his room.

The hand quickly left his mouth and soft lips replaced it. Sheldon let out a noise that sounded suspiciously like a squeak to his own ears. Another sound quickly followed as he felt something warm and wet slide across his top lip.

Penny's tongue.

Sheldon's mind shut down at the thought of the many, many bacteria that were-

Oh.

Sheldon's heart began pounding in his ears as light fingers made their way from his collarbone to the juncture behind his ear. His eyes slid shut involuntarily.

_Mononucleosis. Streptococcus. Hepatitis. Herpes Simplex Virus-1._

Something akin to a groan made its way out of Sheldon's throat as a heavy weight- a thigh?- slid across his groin slowly.

A physical reaction not unknown to happen occasionally (much to the disbelief of his small circle of friends and colleagues) began to take place, and Sheldon felt a mild panic catch in his throat.

Oh lord, it was happening.

Simple, unavoidable biology was beating out reason and logic.

Frustration mounted, but his mind couldn't seem to focus on more than one thing at a time. Currently, the tiny nibbles at his bottom lip were gaining the attention of his full focus, much to his dismay.

The situation that was making itself known in his Monday night selection of sleepwear suddenly caught the attention of the girl above him. Feeling a smile against his lips, he felt the body above him reach down and deftly move back his waistband.

Sheldon gasped.

...and jumped up, clutching the covers up to his neck. Startled, he glanced around the room, lit by the morning sun. Frantic, he moved his hands over his chest and looked under the covers. An irrational thought, he knew, but there was nobody there.

It had been a dream.

Panting heavily, Sheldon swallowed and slowly reached down his body. Feeling himself through his pants, Sheldon let out a frustrated sigh. It appeared as though the effects of the dream had left him in a real physical state of sexual frustration.

The knock coming from his door was light, but Sheldon jumped nonetheless.

"Sheldon? You up?" Leonard's confused voice came from the other side of the door. "It's your scheduled bathroom time and you're still in bed. Are you okay?"

Sheldon quickly turned to the clock next to his bed.

"Drat."

…

Penny pushed up her sleeves and caught her lip between her teeth. Sucking on it lightly, she weighed her options. She had to move carefully and quietly so as not to spook her prey. Grasping her weapon of choice lightly in her arms, she waited until her target was too close to run away before quickly bursting out into the hallway.

Spooked, Raj jumped and immediately began moving in the other direction.

"No, please wait!" Penny jumped and grasped the sleeve of his sweater vest. She thrust the new _Batman _comic book into his hand. "Here, see, I brought you something!" Penny tried to smile convincingly as she kept her iron grip on Raj's vest.

Raj blinked, distracted momentarily by the shiny new comic book in his hands. Then he suddenly caught himself and turned to Penny with a questioning look in his eyes. The mild panic was still at the forefront, but Penny figured it was because she was standing so close to him.

"Listen, Raj, I need your help," She quickly began as she steered Raj out of the hallway and into the Humanities office. She shoved him into the visitor chair and shut the door so he couldn't leave. Dr. Muller was lecturing for the next hour, so she had plenty of time to get the answers that she needed.

Sheldon hadn't spoken to her since Monday evening. It was now Friday. Hell, he hadn't even so much as _looked _at her and it was starting to really piss her off. What could she have possibly done?

Well, aside from leaving her mugs in their kitchen sink...or replacing the toilet paper roll backwards again...or touching his food after a particularly condescending comment during dinner on Monday night.

Even if it had been one of those things, Sheldon would have surely taken the time to point them out to her. Except he hadn't. He'd simply begun ignoring her on Tuesday morning.

Making her way around the large desk, Penny sat down slowly in her chair, taking the time to cross her legs and lean in on the corner of the desk. Staring Raj down with narrowed eyes, she clicked and unclicked a pen, attempting to add tension to the room.

Raj sat unblinking in his chair, hands rubbing his thighs nervously. His head was ducked down and his eyes were darting to and fro. Several times he cleared his throat and looked like he was trying to say something, but then he glanced at her face and nothing came out but a light squeak.

"Why is Sheldon avoiding me?" Penny just came out and asked it.

Raj's eyes seemed to bulge out of his head.

"Come on," Penny leaned in closer. "I know you guys talked during Halo night. He must have mentioned something," She narrowed her eyes. "Has he given me three strikes?"

Raj shook his head vehemently and shook his hands in front of his body for emphasis.

"Is that a no?" Penny asked, confused. "Or are you trying to get out of having this conversation?"

Raj shook his head no again, then gave her pleading eyes.

"Nope," Penny shook her head. "I'm not letting you out of this, Raj. You've got to help me." An idea came to her suddenly. "Will a pad of paper and a pen work?"

Raj paused, seemed to consider this option, then shrugged lightly.

Penny pulled a piece of paper off the pad and handed it to him. She then clicked the pen in her hand one final time before handing it to him.

Raj wrote frantically, his hand shaking slightly. Penny waited patiently until Raj finished and turned the paper around so she could read it.

"What do you mean you have no idea?" Penny demanded, frowning. "Come on, you guys talk about everything!"

_Sheldon_? Raj wrote.

"Well, I guess you have a point there," Penny sighed, falling back into her chair. Sheldon would talk about a lot of things, but she had never known him to talk about personal problems to anyone.

Raj shrugged again, and seemed genuinely apologetic.

Penny pursed her lips. "Well, thanks anyway."

Raj gave her a thumbs up, then stood up, the _Batman _comic book in hand.

"Wait," Penny stood up and reached across the desk, swiftly grabbing the comic book out of Raj's hand.

Raj stood there with a 'What?' look on his face, arms outstretched.

"Hey, no answers, no comic book," Penny shrugged lightly, throwing the comic book down on her desk. "Sorry."

Raj's head dropped down and he made his way back out into the hallway, giving a half-hearted wave on his way out.

Penny sank down in her chair. She fingered the edge of the crisp comic book. It seemed as though a new approach was needed.

After a quick search on the internet, she quickly picked up her phone and dialed a number.

"Hey, it's Penny. Listen, I need a favour..."

…

"Furthermore, it seems to be having a negative affect on the limited space-constraints available, which is causing a veritable increase in time spent on useless dialogue rather than valuable theoretical debate."

"Sheldon," Leonard heard the whine in his voice. "Raj put one picture of his family on the desk. Is it really that big of a deal?"

"What part of 'it seems to be having a negative affect on the limited space-constraints available, which is causing a veritable increase in time spent on useless dialogue rather than valuable theoretical debate' did you not understand?" Sheldon frowned as they both made their way up to the fourth floor of the building.

Leonard shifted the hot pizza box in his arms and sighed. "I give up. You're right, as usual."

They approached the front door, and Sheldon took out his key to put in the lock. As it slid in, Sheldon jerked upright and froze.

"What is it?" Leonard asked, shifting the box again.

"It would appear as though the door is unlocked," Sheldon frowned, turning around to the other man.

"That's impossible, you locked it this morning," Leonard shifted the box. "Can we just go inside please? Preferably before I have third-degree burns all over my arms?"

"That would be impossible, given the temperature of the pizza box and the layers of clothing between it and you," Sheldon remarked distractedly before slowly opening the door and peering inside.

"Oh, hey guys!"

Both Sheldon and Leonard froze.

Penny stood in front of the television, hooking up an old, original Nintendo system. She was wearing shorts and a rather large t-shirt with _The Flash_ symbol in the middle of her chest. On the table there was a pizza box and one small bowl of spaghetti with what appeared to be cut-up hot dogs.

"Ready to get your geek on, boys?" Penny finished hooking up the two controllers and stood up proudly, hands on her hips.

"What the-," Leonard heard the words escape his mouth as he looked around. He glanced up at Sheldon, and was surprised to find his eyes glued to Penny's shirt.

"That's my shirt," Sheldon finally remarked after a few minutes of silence.

"Nope," Penny grinned. "It's mine. I bought it from the comic book store."

Sheldon blinked again, then looked around. His eyes caught the bowl of spaghetti.

"It's pizza night," he said distractedly.

"That's why I got pizza," Penny pointed to the pizza box on the table. "The spaghetti is just for you. In case you wanted it," she smiled.

He turned to the Nintendo system. "It's vintage game night."

"Hence, the vintage games," Penny's voice sounded a bit more unsure as she pointed to the Nintendo system.

There were a few more minutes of awkward silence. Leonard shifted the pizza box several more times before giving up and throwing it on the nearby desk.

"Penny?"

"Yes Sheldon?" Penny asked cautiously.

"I'm not happy that you stole our emergency key back," he said as he lifted the messenger bag off of his chest. He walked over to his desk and placed it down carefully.

"I know, I figured that," Penny replied wryly.

"However, in light of the situation, I find that your actions were most acceptable," he continued before eagerly making his way over to his spot.

Penny beamed, turning around to smile at Leonard as well. He smiled back. Even though he wasn't exactly happy about the way things were going between Penny and Sheldon, he had to admit that it was nice that they were getting along nicely.

"Here, have a chocolate," Sheldon held out a chocolate from the side table.

Leonard felt his head drop into his hands.

"Oh, yum!" Penny smiled, oblivious. She leaned forward and took the chocolate from Sheldon's fingers, frowning when he jerked his hand back after he released the treat. Shrugging it off, she turned around and sat down in the lounger.

"So, do we eat first, or play first?" She asked, smiling when she saw Sheldon eying the bowl of spaghetti. She knew he wouldn't eat it, it was Friday, of course. But just the act of making it for him seemed to break down whatever it was he was angry about. She was thrilled he was actually looking at her and talking again.

"Well, we should probably wait for Raj and Howard to get here," Leonard trailed off as he, too, put down his bag.

"I trust they won't be late this week," Sheldon said as he stood up and picked up the bowl of pasta. As he walked into the kitchen, Penny remembered the time she made french toast and he threw it out. Turning around and narrowing her eyes, she watched as Sheldon walked into the kitchen. As he passed the trash can, she relaxed slightly and watched as he pulled out a plastic container. Smiling proudly, she watched as he transferred the pasta from the bowl in the the container before placing it in the fridge.

_Victory_, she thought to herself. It was a small one, but she would take it.

She watched as he came back from the kitchen and sat down in his spot. He seemed to be uncomfortable with her stare, but she didn't care.

Phase one of her plan. Complete.

Phase two was going to be a bit more difficult...

_A/N: Yay! Another update! We're actually moving forward!_

_Thanks for the reviews, guys. You're all awesome. :3_


	24. Chapter 24

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty-Three_

Penny was not happy.

Taking one last look at the dark clouds outside the window, she sighed and realized that the second part of her plan was going to have to be canceled.

Nerds do not play paintball in the middle of a thunderstorm.

A sudden clap of thunder made everyone in the room jump slightly.

"Well, I guess that settles that," Sheldon finally spoke and stood from his computer desk chair, dressed in his paintball jumpsuit. He made his way down the hallway toward his bedroom, disappearing from sight.

"I guess we should probably change too," Howard said, looking away from his phone to glance at the window. "According to the news, it's expected to rain all day."

Leonard sighed and leaned back into the chair he was seated in. "Comic book store?" He offered lightly after a minute.

Raj immediately slid off his bar stool and walked over to whisper into Leonard's ear.

"I know we just went on Thursday, but what else are we going to do?" Leonard threw his arms out, looking up at Raj.

Raj, in turn, shrugged, and went back to his bar stool.

"Any good movies out?" Howard asked, already bringing up the page on his phone.

"No, there's nothing really good out," Leonard sighed again. "I checked yesterday."

"Hm," Howard nodded in agreement as he scanned the list of movies out on his phone.

Penny rolled her head on the back of the couch to face forward and sighed. Great. Part two of her plan to figure out why Sheldon had stopped talking to her was now up in smoke. To make matters worse, it appeared as though her efforts from last night had no lasting effect either. After a night full of pizza and watching the boys play video games, she had woken up this morning to the alarm that Sheldon had set. Waking up, she noticed that he was standing over her, bowl of cereal in hand. She had moved to the other side of the couch, but as soon as she had placed her feet against his thigh, he had stiffened and asked Penny to move. Mentally sighing, and feeling quite depressed, Penny had tucked her legs in closer to her body and tried in vain to return to sleep.

What had she done wrong?

Penny closed her eyes and shook her head lightly. She couldn't think of a reason why Sheldon would just stop talking to her altogether. She almost wished that he had given her a strike; at least then she would know what she had done.

Then again, a small part of her brain was reminding her that perhaps Dr. Whack-a-doodle was just being Dr. Whack-a-doodle for no particular reason. After all, it _was_ Sheldon.

The sound of footsteps came out from the hallway and Penny opened her eyes to watch as Sheldon smoothed down the sleeves of his layered shirts and made his way to his computer desk. As he sat down, he booted up his laptop and immediately began typing away.

"What are you doing?" Leonard asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"Typing up an email to the local news station about firing their meteorologist," Sheldon replied shortly, as if it were obvious. "This is the third time this week that he has incorrectly predicted weather patterns." His voice lowered to a scathing mumble. "A three-year-old with a Magic 8 ball could have done a better job."

A collective sigh came from the group behind him, but no comments or protests were made.

"Well, I suppose if nothing else we could always just walk around the mall," Howard offered with a shrug.

Penny immediately frowned, suspicious. Since when did Howard express any interest in walking around a shopping mall? Turning her head toward him, she quickly snatched up his phone from his hand. Scanning the page he had open on the screen, she groaned. "Victoria's Secret Angels to unveil new store opening this weekend?"

At that, both Leonard and Raj seemed to perk up. Raj's eyes were wider than she had ever seen them.

"Seriously?" Leonard gave a short, awkward laugh. He seemed to have caught Penny's glare from the couch and immediately changed his tune. "I mean, well, you know...I have to go to the mall anyway, for...socks," he finished lamely.

"See," Howard lifted his arm toward Leonard and turned to Penny. "The man needs socks, Penny. We have to go."

Raj began nodding frantically from his perch across the room.

"You guys are pathetic," Penny shook her head. The last thing she wanted to do was trail behind a group of nerds while they gawked at a group of tall, gorgeous supermodels in tight clothing.

"I'll throw a pair of shoes in it for you if you come and pretend to be my ex-girlfriend," Howard replied, eyebrow waggling.

"Not in a million years, Howard," Penny replied flatly.

"Oh come on," Howard pleaded. "I need somebody to talk me up and subtly suggest that parts of me aren't directly proportional to my height," he finished with slight pleading look.

Penny stared at him, eyebrow also raised. "Your head?" She asked dryly, and finished with a sweet smile that did not reach her eyes.

"Your freakishly small feet?" Leonard added.

At that, Penny frowned and looked down at Howard's feet.

"Dude," Howard stared at Leonard with an angry look on his face. "You said you wouldn't bring that up again." Scoffing, he slowly turned back to Penny to find her comparing her foot to the size of his. "Damn it, would you-," Howard jerked his foot away and tried to move them out of sight under the coffee table.

"Wow, they really are small," Penny replied, watching as his shoes disappeared under the coffee table. "Do you have to buy shoes in the little boys' section?" She asked, trying to get another peek at his shoes.

"Can we just forget about my feet for one second here and get back to the fact that seriously hot supermodels are going to be at the mall in the next hour or so?" Howard interjected angrily.

"So go," Penny shrugged and leaned back into the couch. As much as she desperately wanted to go shopping, she hadn't been paid from the university yet. Sighing, she tried to think back to the last time she went shopping for herself. Was it that top or those earrings? Either way, it had been three months ago. She hadn't gone this long without shopping since she was twelve. Her inner shopaholic was dying inside.

"We can't go to a women's underwear store alone," Howard scoffed. "We'll come off as creepy."

"You are creepy," Penny replied.

"Just come with us and stand near us for a little bit," Howard cajoled. "I'll throw in a pair of shoes and lunch."

Penny sighed. If she didn't give in, Howard was going to press her all day. She opened one eye to look at him. "You promise I won't have to pretend or say anything?"

"Promise," Howard assured her, laying a hand on her shoulder in an effort to appear sincere.

Penny frowned and looked down at the hand. "Off."

He removed the hand, a bit slower than she would have liked.

Penny sighed again. "Fine," she threw a hand up in defeat.

Raj jumped up from his chair and pumped a fist in the air.

"Awesome," Leonard grinned. "I'll go get changed. Should we all just meet there in an hour?"

"Sounds good to me," Howard said as he jumped up and ran for the door, Raj hot on his heels. The door shut behind them.

"You coming with us, Sheldon?" Leonard asked quickly, stripping his helmet off.

"I would rather stand in a puddle outside and hold onto a metal rod," Sheldon replied, not looking up from typing his email.

"Great," Leonard grinned. "We'll be back in time for dinner," he called out as he ran down the hallway to change.

Penny frowned as she watched him go, put off by the fact that they were ditching Sheldon again.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" Penny asked without thinking. Not really expecting an answer, she stood up and stretched, her muscles cramped from sitting for too long. "You can expand your next research thing to humans in their natural habitat," she teased lightly.

At that, Sheldon's shouldered stiffened slightly. "I am not conducting research," he said firmly.

Not understanding what he was talking about, Penny frowned. "Then what do you do all day at the University?" She threw a hand out.

"Oh," Sheldon replied as he stopped typing on his keyboard. He half-turned his head as if to answer her, then turned back to his laptop and began typing once more.

Penny rolled her eyes. "Whack-a-doodle," she mumbled. "Come on, come with us," she tried once more. The thought of leaving him alone didn't seem to sit well with her. Besides, she still had to figure out why he hadn't talked to her at all this past week. "I think they have Icees in the food court," she cajoled.

Sheldon stopped typing.

"And I'm pretty sure you can buy Red Vines in that candy store," Penny continued hopefully.

"Drat," Sheldon said after a pause. "I do love Red Vines."

"See? Come on, I'll buy you Red Vines. It'll just come off the money I owe you," Penny pointed out.

Sheldon stood up cautiously from his seat. "I suppose a few hours wasted in a social arena occupied by prepubescent delinquents and a multitude of consumers led by the false promise of misplaced advertising wouldn't be so bad."

"Plus, if we're lucky, we'll get to see Howard get beat up by a group of supermodels."

00000

_WHEW! I got the ball rolling at least. Sorry for the delay, everybody. This past month has been insane. I just caught up on the last three Big Bang Theory episodes last night. I can't believe I missed them! Either way, I have a plan for the next chapter and I promise it won't take as long as this update took._

_Thanks so much for sticking with me and my little story everybody! Reviews are love!_


	25. Chapter 25

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty-Five_

"What about that one?"

"No."

"That one?"

"No."

"Oh, how about that one?"

"Penny, I've explained this before. Bears are terrifying," Sheldon insisted, his eyes glued to the window display of teddy bears that Penny was pointing to.

Turning in time to see the slight quiver of his lip, Penny smiled slightly. He was gripping a package of opened Red Vines tightly to his chest with both hands. She could see that this was bothering him, but for some reason, she didn't exactly want to stop. He was finally talking to her again. Granted, it was just little comments here and there, but she'd take it.

"Seriously? Even that little one over there?" She pointed to the window once more. "It's smaller than your hand."

"Penny," Sheldon began in his usual condescending tone. "That bear stands at approximately twenty-two centimeters-,"

Penny rolled her eyes as she reached over and grabbed his closest hand. After grappling with it over the Red Vines package, she then pushed his hand against the store window, placing her hand on top of his so he couldn't move away.

She frowned. "Oh, I guess it is bigger," she said, slightly distracted by the feel of his warm hand under hers. Even though his hand was trapped beneath hers, he completely dwarfed hers in size. Taking a moment to admire the look of his hand under hers, she felt his muscles under her wrist tensing and pulling slightly. Allowing his hand to jerk back away from hers, Penny turned around and looked up to make sure she hadn't broken him again.

He was cradling his hand to his chest and looking down at her hand with an odd curious look on his face.

"What?" She asked, frowning.

There was a long pause before he finally answered. "Small hands," he finally replied, still looking down at her hands.

Penny held her hands up in front of her face for inspection. "Really? How small are we talking here? Cute small, or freakishly small?"

She didn't receive an answer but saw him shake his head and turn to begin walking down the corridor once more. She turned and followed him slowly, still inspecting her hands. They weren't _that_ small, were they? They were normal sized hands for a person of her size...right? Feeling a bit like a freak, she tucked her hands into her pockets. She suddenly felt bad for making fun of Howard's feet.

Catching up to Sheldon, she made sure he was right next to her and matched his pace. The last thing she wanted to do was lose him in a crowded mall. "Is there anything you need while we're here?" She asked him lightly.

"I don't shop here," he responded quickly, fishing out a new Red Vine and taking a small bite.

"I think they have something like a comic book store here," Penny said quickly, remembering that weird store near the food court.

Sheldon sighed. "Penny, in a world where I already have a comic book store to shop from, why would I go to something 'like a comic book store'?"

"Just suggesting," Penny snapped, a sudden frown appearing over her face. Damn but he was being difficult today. She was hoping the Icee and the Red Vines would have put him in a better mood, but it appears that plan clearly failed.

"Do you want to-," Penny started before she was cut off by Leonard's voice.

"Penny!"

Both Penny and Sheldon turned around quickly and located the sound of his voice. Penny's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open slightly.

"What happened?" She asked as the three boys approached them.

Raj and Leonard were supporting a limping Howard, who also sported a nice dark red spot over one eye. He seemed to be unfazed by his injuries, though, as a rather creepy looking grin was plastered on his face.

"Two guesses," Leonard replied sharply, clearly annoyed by the situation.

"Why two?" Sheldon spoke up. "In most cases, the usual number of guesses proffered by the party withholding information is three."

"Because we have to get out of here before Security finds us, and the answer is fairly clear, Sheldon," Leonard bit out.

"Models?" Penny asked wryly, eyebrow raised.

Raj slowly nodded, shifting his weight so he could support his friend.

"He asked one of the models if they were Victoria and if he could see her 'secret'," Leonard sighed. "She stomped on his foot while another model knocked him out with her fist," he nodded toward the black eye Howard was sporting.

"I got a nice closeup of of her cleavage," Howard was saying softly in a dreamy-like voice. "It was worth it."

"Well, it wasn't worth it for us," Leonard insisted. "Now we have to get out of here before Security finds us." He shifted Howard's weight on his shoulder and dug into his pocket for his car keys. "Here," he said, handing the keys to Penny. "We have to take him to a hospital. He passed out for a minute after he was hit. We're thinking concussion."

"So, you want me to drive?" Penny glanced at the keys, confused.

"No, we're taking Raj's car," Leonard pointed to Raj, who was holding up his set of car keys.

"Hey!"

They all turned in time to see three Security officers running toward them from half-way down the corridor.

"Shit, have to go," Leonard and Raj began rushing Howard toward the exit.

Penny blinked as the three Security officers went running past them, chasing the three nerds down.

"Think they'll make it?" She asked Sheldon distractedly. A moment later she straightened. "Are-are they already in the car?" She asked, squinting to try and look through the glass exit doors fifty feet away.

"It would appear so, given by the fact that the Security guards have given up and are now focusing their attention on that vending machine," Sheldon commented lightly, taking another bite of his Red Vine.

Penny sighed, then glanced at the keys in her hand. "Well, now what?"

"I'm given to understand that there are vendors in this shopping mall that dedicate their entire inventory to women's shoes."

Penny frowned, then looked up at Sheldon. "Are you suggesting that we go shoe shopping?"

"You bought me an Icee and Red Vines. Social protocol dictates that I must now offer a favor in kind," Sheldon replied, not looking happy with the situation at all.

"Oh, sweetie, you really don't have to," Penny shook her head and smiled. It was kind of cute how nice he was trying to be, even considering he had been an ass the whole morning.

"No," Sheldon shook his head. "It's a non-optional convention. In order to preserve the perceived level of friendship between two parties, one must give as much as one receives," he explained, eyebrow twitching into a slight frown.

"But it's shoes," Penny lifted her hand to rest on the edge of his t-shirt sleeve. "Shoes, sweetie. You can't stand listening to people talk about shoes, how on earth are you going to spend three hours shopping for them?"

Sheldon's face snapped away from his Red Vines and sought out her gaze. "Three hours?" A slight Texan twang overtook his speech. "Sweet Jesus, how on earth can you muster the mental capabilities to handle something as banal as shoe shopping for three hours?"

Penny smiled. "That's how long it takes to find the right pair, Sheldon," she pat his arm. "So, you ready to go?" She leaned in teasingly, having no real intention of dragging him around to go shopping for shoes. She could tell by the lack of colour in his usually pale face that he hadn't realized what he had gotten himself into.

She watched as Sheldon sputtered for a few moments, mouth opening and closing rapidly. She could tell he was trying to think of a reason not to go.

She decided to take pity on him. Grinning, she leaned in closer. "Actually, I'm really not in the mood to go shoe shopping."

"You're not?" Sheldon finally managed to find his voice, and it sounded relieved.

"No," Penny shook her head before looping her arm in his and nudged him toward the mall exit. "Come on, I have a better idea."

…

"See? Wasn't this a better idea?" Penny spoke around a mouthful of pizza.

"You have a piece of cheese hanging from your lip," Sheldon replied distractedly, taking a bite of his slice.

"Really?" Penny picked the piece of cheese off her bottom lip and held it up. She laughed. "String cheese," she winked at Sheldon.

Something akin to a slight smile appeared to take over the right side of his mouth before disappearing with the next bite of cheese. He clearly remembered his insult from the week before.

"I really like this place," Penny nodded to herself and took a look around. She had driven straight to the little pizza slice shop from the mall and had received surprisingly little protest from Sheldon. He had insisted on waiting for a new pizza to come out of the oven, and he had insisted all employees behind the counter immediately wash their hands and put on gloves. Other than that, it was a surprisingly normal lunch with Sheldon.

She smiled to herself. She wasn't sure why he'd been avoiding her the past week, but since he was talking to her now, she decided to just chalk it all up to Sheldon being Sheldon.

"They have a more appealing ratio of bread to sauce to cheese," Sheldon agreed, taking another bite.

"So is this a Sheldon-approved restaurant now?" Penny asked teasingly.

"Considering that you've dragged me here twice, I believe I don't have much of a choice," he muttered, wiping his mouth with a napkin.

"Oh, come on, it's not that bad," she grinned, finishing off her pizza slice and wiping her mouth as well.

"Penny, I have a rather serious subject I need to discuss with you," Sheldon suddenly spoke after a long pause. He picked up his five napkins as he spoke and arranged them neatly on top of his plate.

"What's up?" Penny asked, leaning back in her seat, completely at ease. She frowned and leaned down to pick a piece of lint off her top.

"I would like to discuss with you a possible change in our relationship paradigm," he began.

"Okay," Penny frowned.

"Currently, we seem to be friends," he said. "Would you consider this a fair assessment?"

"Sure," Penny shrugged, reaching for her drink. "So what's wrong with that?" She asked, taking a long drink from her straw.

"Nothing, except, lately I've been considering entering in a possible relationship with you."

Penny's eyes bulged as she choked on her drink. Coughing and sputtering, she gripped the edge of the table as she tried to dislodge some of the liquid in her airway.

"What?" She asked, a bit higher and louder than she had intended.

"Have you sufficiently-,"

"Yes I've sufficiently removed the damn soda from my...whatever," Penny waved a hand in the air. "Now would you mind repeating what you just said?" She demanded, shocked.

"I've been considering entering in a possible relationship with you," Sheldon repeated, as calm and collected as ever.

Penny froze and stared at him. "Is this a joke?" She asked, looking around the store. She half-expected a film crew to jump out at any moment. A thought occurred to her suddenly and she laughed. "Oh, I get it! Bazinga, right?" She pointed a finger at him. "Oh man, you really had me going!" She laughed again, and felt it falter to nothing when he continued to stare at her with a serious expression on his face.

"Oh god, you're serious?" Penny leaned in closer, her voice almost a whisper.

"I've been giving the matter some thought for the past week now," Sheldon continued, seemingly not affected by her reaction at all. "I've been distracted at work for weeks now and I couldn't quite place the reason. There have also been some...sleep issues that have been plaguing me for the past week," a slight pink seemed to settle over the tops of his ears. "I believe the reason is due to the shift in our relationship paradigm, Penny."

Penny stared at him for several long minutes. Was this really happening? Was Dr. Whack-A-Doodle really turning human in front of her eyes? She closed her eyes softly and sighed. On one hand, she was mentally screaming 'yes' over and over again. On the other...

...this was _Sheldon_.

Did he really understand what he was asking? There would be _touching_ involved for crying out loud!

"If you'll recall, you've been touching me for quite some time now, much to my resistance over the past couple of weeks."

Penny's face flushed as she realized that she had spoken those last few mental questions out loud.

"Sheldon," Penny started. "Do you really understand what you're asking? I mean, have you ever been in a real relationship before?"

"I believe I've conducted enough research online to be sufficiently knowledgeable on the subject," Sheldon nodded his head once.

Penny sat back, considering his answer. She really didn't have much to think about, though. Her mind was made up. She was going to try this. Even if he gave up after one day, it would still be worth it. She'd never get another chance like this. And since she had already known for quite some time that she had feelings for him...

Penny smiled slowly. "Okay, let's do this."

Sheldon nodded once, then stood to clear away his trash from the table.

"But you do realize what the means, right?" Penny asked, suddenly in a teasing mood.

"What?" He asked, walking right into her trap.

"Lunch was on you, _sweetie_."

00000

_A/N: FINALLY! I finally had time to write today. YAY! And look! Sheldon is finally ready to expand into the human experience of dating._

_Quick thanks to CatherineJosephineMarie007 for giving me the idea to have supermodels stomp on Howard's freakishly small feet! ;)_

_Major HUGS to all my reviewers! I'm trying to write as often as I can, and I love your support! _


	26. Chapter 26

**The Paradigm Alteration**

_Chapter Twenty-Six_

* * *

Leonard sighed as he finally reached the top of the stairs. Juggling his messenger bag, the mail from downstairs, and a plastic bag full of new comic books, he found his key ring and slid it into the lock of his front door. Frowning slightly, he realized that it was unlocked. Pulling the key back out, he turned the knob and opened the door.

"_There's nothing disgusting about it. It's just another life form, that's all. You get used to those things."_

Leonard froze in the doorway, his hand halfway to the key bowl. Penny and Sheldon were sitting on the couch watching Star Trek. Penny was leaned into Sheldon's shoulder, totally focused on what was happening on the screen. Sheldon was sitting in his usual spot, a water bottle between his hands on his lap. He, too, was engrossed in the television screen.

Leonard coughed, hoping to shake away a sudden feeling of being uncomfortable. "Um, hey?" He called out to the pair, kicking the door shut behind him.

"Oh, hello," Sheldon turned his head and called out. Leonard could have swore he saw the slightest hint of a smile in the corner of his mouth.

"What are you guys doing?" Leonard asked cautiously, removing his messenger bag and dropping his comic books on his desk. His eyes never once left the odd pair sitting on the couch. He couldn't believe Penny was actually watching Star Trek. He looked around for her phone, maybe she was playing with it and just pretending to watch?

No, that couldn't be it, Leonard frowned as he noticed her cell phone, turned back on, was lying on the kitchen counter, charging.

"We're watching Star Trek," Sheldon replied, this time with a definite curve in his lips as he continued to watch the show.

"I can see that," Leonard fiddled with the cuff of his jacket. "Penny? What are you up to?"

Before she could answer, Sheldon's eyebrows furrowed. "She's watching Star Trek. Can't you see that, Leonard?"

"Yeah, I see it," Leonard muttered, mostly to himself. "I just don't quite understand it," he trailed off.

"It's Anything-Can-Happen-Thursday," Penny said happily before laughing at something McCoy said. "You know, I really like McCoy. He's funny."

"He does provide a certain comical experience to an otherwise humorless occupation on board the ship," Sheldon replied.

Leonard felt his facial featured contort in confusion. She was actually _watching _the show enough to know the characters' names? Whenever he put Star Trek on, she either buried her face in her phone or left to go back to her apartment.

Shaking his head, Leonard removed his jacket and placed it on his desk chair. "I thought Anything-Can-Happen-Thusdays were only once every three weeks," he mumbled.

"Yeah, so did we," Penny's voice reached him. It sounded a bit sharp.

Leonard hung his head slightly. Yeah, he supposed they had turned it into a weekly thing...mainly to get rid of Sheldon for an evening. But hey, who could blame them? They needed a break from Sheldon every once in a while. He was a lot to handle.

"I'm going to get changed," Leonard said as he began walking toward his room. "A pen exploded all over my shirt today." He quickly ducked into the hallway, avoiding the two people on the couch, who seemed a bit too comfortable with one another.

Penny watched as Leonard disappeared from view. "What's his problem?" She asked.

"I assume a large stain of ink that is unlikely to wash out," Sheldon replied automatically, not looking up from the television.

Penny snorted. "I meant his behaviour," she clarified. "He's acting funny."

"I see no difference in how he usually acts." Penny felt Sheldon's shoulder shrug lightly against her head.

"Really? Well, maybe it's just me," she turned back to the episode they were currently watching. She sighed happily. If anybody had told her six weeks ago that she would be happy to sit on a couch with Sheldon and watch Star Trek, she would have laughed. Things have changed, Penny thought to herself. She was enjoying spending time with Sheldon. Nothing unusual or special had really occurred since Sheldon had informed her that he would like to start dating last week. She hadn't really expected anything to. He seemed more at ease with her touches, and he even once tolerated a quick hug goodbye before Penny had left to spend time with her girlfriends (not without attempting a lecture on the various diseases that could be transferred through touch, naturally).

Of course, he wasn't seeking out physical contact, either. Penny was quite content to lean on his shoulder, even if a tiny voice in her head reminded her that it would also be nice if Sheldon would put his arm around her.

Quelling those little reminders seemed to be easy for Penny. She knew that Sheldon was just coming around to the idea of being in close proximity with her on a daily basis.

"Hey," Penny said suddenly as her stomach growled. "What are we doing for dinner?" She sat up and looked over at Sheldon.

"Well," Sheldon reached for the remote and paused the episode. "On Thursdays we usually order pizza."

"Yeah, but this is Anything-Can-Happen-Thursdays," Penny reminded him. "Any chance I can drag you to that great Mexican restaurant around the corner?"

"Highly unlikely," Sheldon replied, and Penny's heart sank a little. "I doubt you could even drag me out the door."

Penny blinked.

"Bazinga."

She laughed, and felt a little thrill somewhere in her belly as Sheldon's face cracked the tiniest of grins.

"What's going on?" Leonard asked as he came into the room once more, smoothing out his new shirt.

"I'm going to try and drag Sheldon to that Mexican restaurant around the corner," she gave a little wink Sheldon's way. "Want to come with?" She asked, fully expecting him to decline.

"Actually, yeah, that sounds great!"

"Oh," Penny's smile faltered slightly. "Really?"

"Sure, I had no other plans for dinner. Raj and Howard are going over to Howard's place tonight. Howard's mom made a brisket," he explained as he rifled through the mail pile and threw two envelopes on Sheldon's desk.

"Oh, okay," Penny slowly stood up. It wasn't exactly how she had planned on tonight going, but it was okay. She couldn't see a problem with Leonard coming with them. After all, she could get more alone time with Sheldon later, when they came home to finish the episode they had started.

"Great, let's go," Leonard grinned and grabbed his coat.

* * *

"Hey wait a minute," Leonard turned around from the driver's seat to glance at Penny. "This isn't a Sheldon-approved restaurant," he exclaimed suddenly as they pulled into the parking lot.

"It's fine," Penny waved a hand as if to wave away his concerns. She unbuckled her seat belt as Leonard parked the car.

"How is it oka-," Leonard began.

"Penny is familiar with the restaurant criteria I require," Sheldon replied, unbuckling himself and stepping out of the car.

"What does that mean?" Leonard came around the car as they began walking toward the entrance to the restaurant.

"One of my friends works here," Penny explained. "She assured me that they have a special cleaning crew to clean the kitchen, they use an outside, Sheldon-approved laundry company to clean their napkins, and I checked out their health inspection reports online."

Leonard stared at her for a few moments while they entered and waited for a waitress to seat them.

"You did all of that?" He asked, perplexed.

"Yeah," Penny sighed.

"Why?" He asked, bewildered. "Why go through all that trouble just for Sheldon?"

"It wasn't for Sheldon," Penny grumbled. "I wanted to eat somewhere different for a change. If I had to go through all of that just to eat something other than thai, chinese, or pizza, then I didn't have much of a choice, now did I?"

"Oh," Leonard nodded, satisfied. "I'm surprised Sheldon trusts you enough to-,"

"Hey Penny!" Leonard was cut off as a waitress with dark hair hurried over to give Penny a quick hug. She was quickly introduced to Sheldon and Leonard before the waitress motioned them to follow her to a table. After taking their drink order, she quickly ran off to fill it. Leonard watched as Sheldon began arranging his napkin and cutlery.

"Well, this is exciting," Leonard exclaimed happily. "I haven't been to a Mexican restaurant in years. This is going to be great!"

"We have to leave," Sheldon said suddenly.

"What?" Penny asked, startled. "Why?"

Sheldon merely pointed to his fork. A three-tine fork.

Leonard sighed.

"You have _got _to be kidding me," Penny glared at Sheldon. "Seriously? I'm not going to walk out on my friend after she's already taken our drink order."

"I would like to refer you to page twenty-six of the relationship agreement," Sheldon said as he pulled out a mini-composition book out of his back pocket. "_A non-approved restaurant may be deemed acceptable should the following conditions be met,_" He turned to the next page. "_2c: The restaurant in question must have standard cutlery._ Three-tine forks are not standard cutlery," Sheldon finished, holding up the fork in question.

"Wh-, wait, the _what _agreement?" Leonard demanded, his voice higher than usual.

"Wait a minute," Penny grumbled as she reached inside her purse, pulling out a similar-looking composition book. Flipping through the pages, she triumphantly slapped the book down on the table and reached back into her purse. Pulling out a little sealed packet containing a plastic fork, knife, spoon, and napkin, she put it on Sheldon's plate. "There. Standard, unused cutlery. An acceptable substitution."

"Can somebody answer-, wait, you walk around with take-out cutlery in your purse?" Leonard asked, bewildered.

"I work for the stereotypical absent-minded professor," Penny replied, tucking her composition book back into her purse. "I also carry tissues, red pens, and extra copies of her meeting schedule."

"And you're okay with that?" Leonard asked.

"Leonard, she pays me enough to buy a new purse every week. She can put whatever she wants in there," Penny snapped her purse shut and turned to Sheldon, watching as he carefully lifted the take-out cutlery packet, a frown on his face. His lips were pressed tight, as if he were holding back objections, but everyone knew that he had no recourse. He had written the agreement himself.

"Back to my original question...you guys have a _relationship agreement_?" Leonard asked, trying to reason with himself. Surely it wasn't referring to an actual relationship in a dating sense. It must have been that Sheldon and Penny were at odds with each other often enough that Sheldon had decided to draw up an agreement for their friendship. Friendships are technically relationships, right?

"Oh, yeah," Penny smiled. "Sheldon and I are testing out a new relationship," she beamed.

"What kind of relationship?" Leonard asked slowly, eyes moving between Penny and Sheldon.

"We're dating," Sheldon said simply, his attention focused on opening his cutlery and arranging it around his plate.

Leonard felt his stomach and jaw drop at the same time. Recovering slightly, he slowly closed his mouth, watching absently as Penny accepted the unacceptable three-tine fork from Sheldon and place it amongst her own forks.

"Okay, I have your drinks," the waitress walked back and placed a cup in front of each of them. "Are you guys ready to order?" She asked, pulling out an order pad.

"I am," Penny said.

"Is there any chance I could get a barbeque bacon cheeseburger, barbeque, bacon, and cheese on the side?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Sheldon! This is a Mexican restaurant. They don't have cheeseburgers. Just pick something from the menu!"

The waitress watched as Penny and her friend squabbled over the menu. Turning to the other person at the table, she smiled at his open menu. "Are you ready to order?" She smiled, pen at the ready. The man continued to stare at the other two people at the table, a bewildered look on his face.

"Sir? Are you ready to order? …sir?"

* * *

_A/N: I'm so sorry I abandoned this story for so long. :/ Well, I didn't really abandon it...it was always in the back of my mind. I've been so busy lately. x_x However, I should have more time now to finish the story! Yay! _

_Sorry if this chapter isn't up to my usual writing...it's probably going to take a chapter or two to get back into the swing of things. I watched all four seasons of TBBT to get back into the characters' mindsets. It's so difficult now because I think Amy's character is hilarious and I'd like to add her in, but I'm afraid that might change the story entirely. :/ Oh well. Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you so much for reading and sticking with me all this time. _

_More to come soon! _


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